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Dead Pool Round 76: Dog Dayz Edition

So they finally let the poor kid go. The commenter Formerly Known as Skeptic wins dick with Bobbi Kristina Brown. A short, sad story and not much good to come of it.

Except, you know, Skeptic won dick.

Okay, you ready?

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody. Plus (Pupster’s Rule) no picking someone who’s only famous for being the oldest person alive.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay? Also, make sure you have a correct spelling of your choice somewhere in your comment. These threads get longish and I use search to figure out if we have a winner.

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing on paper suffused with elephant shit particles. Because I’m fresh out of fairy shit particles.


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:02 pm

Jackson 5 patriarch, Joe Jackson.

Comment from LesterIII
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:02 pm

Zsa Zsa Gabor, you may deserve to spend more time in this worldly hell, but should move on to your much deserved eternal one…

Comment from Harry
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:02 pm

Valerie Harper!!! Sorry, Rhoda…

Comment from Fawn
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:02 pm

Alan Alda.

Comment from Montenegro
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:02 pm

I’ll take Muhammad Ali !!!

Comment from Hutch
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:05 pm

Olivia de Havilland

Comment from BrendaM
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:06 pm

Carol Channing

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:08 pm

Hugh “Pass Me the Viagra, Sweetie” Hefner of cardiac and circulatory failure while in the midst of tongue-lashing his latest “girl friend.”

Comment from dissent555
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:18 pm

Still going with Irwin Corey.

Comment from tibby
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:32 pm

Maureen O’Hara

Comment from Mike
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:34 pm

I’ll go with Al Molinaro… I feel a little bad participating in this, but man, there’s FREE STUFF to be had.

Comment from gebrauchshund
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:37 pm

I’ll go with Fidel Castro, and I will not feel at all bad if I win.

Comment from Pupster
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:49 pm

I’m internet famous! Infamous even!

My pick is Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, ISIS honcho.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:55 pm

I’ll pick David Rockefeller Sr. whose reported death earlier this week was another disappointing but highly amusing Internet hoax.

Comment from JeffS
Time: July 31, 2015, 6:58 pm

Jimmy Carter.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:01 pm

Now that we have peace with Iran, Jimmah Carter can die, happily.

Grammar is so hard. I hope I have expressed that sentiment properly…

Comment from Thursby
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:15 pm

Chuck Berry

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:26 pm

Bruce—just call me Caitlyn—Jenner.

Comment from eirik
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:29 pm

Robert Mugabe

Comment from thefritz
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:38 pm

Game show host Peter Marshall for the block… aka Ralph Pierre LaCock.

Comment from JC
Time: July 31, 2015, 7:40 pm

Paul eherlich again

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: July 31, 2015, 8:20 pm

LesterIII, I think Zsa Zsa, the Rev. Graham and Fidel are having some super-secret zombie vitamin formulae being pumped into ’em. That’s why I didn’t try for Valerie Harper – the secret may be out.

Comment from gromulin
Time: July 31, 2015, 8:29 pm

Kirk Douglas FTW

Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: July 31, 2015, 8:43 pm

Dentist and lion hunter Walter Palmer; either killed by a Leftist who will not be charged [or an illegal alien hired by a Leftist], or by being extradited to Zimbabwe by the regime and killed there. Their legal system does not understand the concepts of either defense or appeals.

Comment from BJM
Time: July 31, 2015, 9:12 pm

Imma losing hope that Tutu will bite the big one…so I’m switching back to Phil the Greek.

Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: July 31, 2015, 9:39 pm

Mikhail Sergeyevich Gorbachev

Comment from Bill the Butcher
Time: July 31, 2015, 9:42 pm

Ramsey Clark — the swine!

Comment from Vince
Time: July 31, 2015, 9:51 pm

Dick Van rogue female biker club Dyke

Comment from gulliblepratt
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:12 pm

OK I’ll take Desmond Tutu

Comment from m
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:24 pm

Roger Moore

Comment from Nana 1
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:32 pm

Nancy Reagan

Comment from Pablo
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:35 pm

Hey, how about Rowdy Roddy Pip….aw shit.

I think I’ll take Roberta McCain for a spin.

Comment from Jeff Weimer
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:43 pm

Ann Margaret.

Comment from catnip
Time: July 31, 2015, 10:43 pm

Actress Marsha Hunt

Comment from Janna
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:08 pm

Billy Graham

Comment from Spad13
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:22 pm

Dan Rather

Comment from Ben
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:33 pm

William Shatner, die you hack!

Comment from RealMc
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:40 pm

Ok so he’s gonna live through another round…..

Clint Eastwood.

Comment from RimrockR
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:58 pm

John Glenn

Comment from cobrakai99
Time: July 31, 2015, 11:59 pm

Joe Biden will be found in a park shot twice by his own shotgun.

Comment from mojo
Time: August 1, 2015, 12:30 am

Fuck it. I am disgusted by my species. I hope they all die, slowly and in agonizing pain.

Does that count?

Comment from PatAZ
Time: August 1, 2015, 12:52 am

David Cassidy. He’s selling his nice home in Ft. Lauderdale and has a much younger, nice looking GF, plus he is looking really bad for 65 years old. Not wishing him ill though.

Comment from xul
Time: August 1, 2015, 3:36 am

Goin’ with Yogi Berra once again. I’m shocked that no manky poachin’ bastige got him yet. 😉

Comment from tonyc
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:09 am

Bernie Sanders, death from Vince Foster disease

Comment from Anonymous
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:17 am

Late to the party, but I made it. I’ll take Vermont Socialist (but caucusing with the Democrats) Bernie Sanders. There must be another psychotropic drug user waiting in the wings.

A perfect opportunity to both remove a roadblock for a former Secretary of State and create another poster boy for “reasonable” gun control.

Comment from RushBabe
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:18 am

Doris Day. Que sera sera.

Comment from Davem123
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:20 am

Crap! Excessive wordiness strikes again. Tonyc beat me to Sanders.

Harry Reid will have to do.

Comment from unkawill
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:35 am

back to abe vigoda

Comment from LesterIII
Time: August 1, 2015, 5:52 am

AltBBrown, I want artwork of THAT sick menage e trois…

“Zsa Zsa, the Rev. Graham and Fidel are having some super-secret zombie vitamin formulae being pumped into ’em.”

… as SWeasel art. Preferrably for my winning the dick!

Comment from dustoffmom
Time: August 1, 2015, 4:30 pm

Curse you Nana for claiming my steady gal Nancy……so I will have to choose another this round and will try James Baker.

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: August 1, 2015, 5:47 pm

Mistress Sweasy may charge extra for THREE profiles on one dick, LesterIII

Comment from weaselwannabee
Time: August 1, 2015, 6:41 pm

George H. W. Bush

Comment from Armybrat
Time: August 1, 2015, 10:52 pm

The not at all honorable Ed Markey, D(umbshit), MA.

Comment from RushBabe
Time: August 1, 2015, 10:57 pm

I’m thinking of putting D(eath) after any proglodyte pol’s name since they’re the party of dissection and death panels.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: August 2, 2015, 12:12 am

Tom Cruise. Maybe the’ll stop making those god-awful “Mission Impossible” films.

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: August 2, 2015, 12:37 am

mojo, I hope I successfully encouraged a relative NOT to upgrade to Win10 for at least 6 mos. – ya gotta year. I’ve got it on a VM and it’s nowhere near primetime ready.

Comment from mojo
Time: August 2, 2015, 12:44 am

AltB: Never will be. Phone OS, don’t need it.

Wait for SP1 before even thinking of upgrading. Shouldn’t be more than 2-3 months.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: August 2, 2015, 9:32 am

Maybe he’ll die so he doesn’t have to outlive his monstrous offspring: Jacques Delors, ex-President of the EU and begetter of the euro. (He declared in 2011 that the euro as implemented was doomed from the start; but he never said so at the time.)

Admin note: I’ve been reviewing the entries, and I find that Ripley could not have won Round 72 with B.B. King, because it was ipley who picked him. Ripley had previously picked Norman Lloyd.

If, as Ms. Weasel ruled, “ipley” was a typo of “Ripley”, then the “ipley” pick of B.B. King was void.

I may dig through the entries to find who did win. Or just forget about it. “What difference does it make now?”

Comment from Mr. Dave
Time: August 2, 2015, 12:27 pm

Bill the Butcher with the artful poach of Ramsey Clark so I will sit this one out and root for Bill to grab the dick. Bill, if you win I am making Ramsey Clark Is Dead Memorial Soup and you are invited for supper.

Comment from Timbo
Time: August 2, 2015, 2:06 pm

Cilla Black

Comment from As If I Cared (now with caps!)
Time: August 2, 2015, 3:09 pm

Noam Chomsky; Hell needs linguistic hacks, too!

Comment from J.S.Bridges
Time: August 2, 2015, 9:15 pm

First off: Congrats to Formerly Known as Skeptic FTW – (BTW: Just ‘tween us’ns, happy to see that the “family/med center bribery” thingy seems to have worked out well for you – was gettin’ a bit of a pain, waiting around for ’em to “man-up” and pop the cork without any added “incentive”, wasn’t it just?…Wait, whut?…you didn’t? – REALly?…Ah – well then, nice timing, chappy! Congrats again!!)

Secondly: Wait, now…my much-aged-though-faithful-and-rather-beloved (whenitworksrightwhichitstoppeddoingdeadbangThursdaylateP.M.) ol’ Faithful Dell coughed, gagged an’ locked-up rather brick-ishly (not even a farewell Blue Screen Of Death, mind you…), late on Thursday eve – necessitating my consultation of The Oracle (i.e., Costco and Best Buy, the only-sorta-tech-savvy-an’-sorta-cheap-o-chap’s boon companions) on Friday eve (after a loo-o-ong day of Technical Slavery to the lesser gods of employment), with a (mercifully) brief return-engagement on Saturday AyeEmm, concluding with a rebirth to The Land Of Tha InnerToobs…all that delay an’ obfuscation an’ such fuss-‘n-feathers…yet still, my near-perennial Dead Pool choice of Red-Pants Janey Insaney Fonda remains available?!?

O, be (relatively) still, my beating heart…

Very well, Jane (the) Fonda (of whom one could hardly be less fond – ah), it shall be for me…so shall it be said, so mote it shall be. C’maaahn, Janey, croak it quick – you can do it, you know you can!!

Third (and Final): Someone please run by, an’ check up on SomeVeg, yes? He put in a brief appearance Friday PeeEmm, but made no pick atall (apparently), an’s not been seed since…Whatup, dood?

Comment from P2
Time: August 2, 2015, 10:29 pm

Whitey ford….. Long time pitcher for the Yankees, which suck very much badly…..

Comment from Cindermutha
Time: August 3, 2015, 3:00 am

George Soros

Comment from frotto
Time: August 3, 2015, 4:57 pm

Norman Lear

Comment from StPatrick_TN
Time: August 3, 2015, 5:09 pm

Little Richard, since Skeptic beat me to Gorbachev.

Comment from Harry
Time: August 3, 2015, 6:01 pm

Sorry Timbo–Cilla Black nee Priscilla White aka “The Voice” left this vale of tears on Saturday Aug 1. Good sneak, though…perhaps our hostess will grant you an “honorary” dick for the attempt…

Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: August 3, 2015, 6:46 pm

Sorry if I poached Gorbie, StPat (I don’t pay close enough attention to note regular picks anyway), but ya really need to be just a bit quicker off the dime.

Comment from sassamon
Time: August 3, 2015, 8:52 pm

Peter Sallis, voice for Wallace, of Wallace and Gromit fame. I don’t wish him ill, but aged 94 years, and no longer able to do voice overs, I may just get the dick soon.

Comment from Carl
Time: August 4, 2015, 10:11 am

Clive James

Comment from Mrs Carl
Time: August 4, 2015, 10:13 am

Denis Healey

Comment from Bikeboy
Time: August 4, 2015, 7:45 pm

Fats Domino.

Comment from David Gillies
Time: August 5, 2015, 12:37 am

Gordon Brown. My hope is that when Jeremy Corbyn is elected Labour leader sensible Labourites will realise that their troubles started when they chose Jonah Broon to be leader and will march in a pitchfork-wielding mob on his dour manse and spifflicate him.

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: August 5, 2015, 8:20 am

“Our fellow Americans have already seen their communities devastated by melting ice and rising oceans.”

Because of that quote, which proves that the man is a lying sack of fear-mongering ahite, I pick Barack Obama.

Comment from thefritz
Time: August 5, 2015, 1:42 pm

A NSFW trailer for the upcoming movie Deadpool.


If you like your violence with a big dose of humor…

Comment from Mike
Time: August 6, 2015, 3:46 pm

I’m now rooting for Timothy S. Carlson to win…


Comment from Anonymous
Time: August 9, 2015, 7:49 pm

RIP: NFL Legend Frank Gifford

Comment from RushBabe
Time: August 12, 2015, 8:41 pm

JeffS – Today comes word Jimmah has liver cancer that has spread to various parts of his body. Treatment at Emory to follow as well as a fuller statement next week.

Comment from joncelli
Time: August 13, 2015, 12:13 pm

Long past time for Michael Moore’s heart to take revenge on the morbidly obese ingrate. Dead from climbing the stairs, if all goes well.

Comment from Mike
Time: August 13, 2015, 4:43 pm

Looks like Jimmy Carter has cut to the front of the line….

Comment from steve
Time: August 13, 2015, 11:24 pm

Crocodile Dundee

Comment from jeff
Time: August 14, 2015, 8:01 pm

Boutros Boutros Ghali, because he did soooo much for humanity, he deserves his reward.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: August 14, 2015, 11:41 pm

@joncelli – Good luck with Michael Moore. I’d love to see that fathead lardass croak. My preference would be for him to choke while trying to swallow a bratwurst whole and then his rescuers find out he’s too fat for the Heimlich maneuver, but I’ll settle for the stairs if that’s what takes him out.

Comment from Spunkus
Time: August 22, 2015, 11:35 pm

Henry Kissinger

Comment from currently
Time: August 22, 2015, 11:57 pm

Edgar Mitchell (astronaut) – in aliens cover-up

Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: August 31, 2015, 11:01 am

Stan Lee

Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: August 31, 2015, 11:03 am

In other news, Wes Craven (of the horror movies genre) has passed away. (Nobody had him as a pick.)

Comment from thefritz
Time: August 31, 2015, 1:21 pm

Best-selling self-help author Wayne W. Dyer dead at 75

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: August 31, 2015, 9:53 pm

Also dead: Oliver Sacks. Author of Awakenings and the Man Who Mistook his Wife for a Hat.

A very good read, even if he did delight the NYT by coming out as gay on his deathbed.

Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: September 1, 2015, 12:10 am

I have that book! (MWMhWfaH). Outstanding read!

The “MWMhWfaH” was interesting, but I really got a sympathetic chuckle reading about the guy who kept throwing “that other person’s nasty leg” out of his bed – and discovering that he somehow ended up on the floor every time.

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 7, 2015, 10:43 pm

Martin Milner, ‘Route 66’ and ‘Adam-12’ star, dies at age 83 – @APEntertainment

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 8, 2015, 1:57 am

Judy Carne, the ‘Sock It to Me Girl’ on ‘Laugh-In,’ dies at age 76

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 8, 2015, 4:11 pm

Andrew Kohut, founding director of the Pew Research Center and president of the organization from 2004 until 2012, has died.

They’re dropping like flies people…just not the right flies.

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 11, 2015, 12:28 pm

RIP Dickie Moore, former member of “Our Gang”

Comment from JC
Time: September 17, 2015, 10:55 pm

There’ now space in the broadcast booth here in Houston. Milo Hamilton, he dead.

Comment from CheshireLion
Time: September 18, 2015, 6:03 pm

Queen Elizabeth II

Comment from Anonymous
Time: September 20, 2015, 1:58 am

British author Jackie Collins died of breast cancer on Saturday. She was 77. RIP

Comment from Veeshir
Time: September 20, 2015, 9:57 pm

Ed Asner.

Man, I didn’t realize I wasn’t in this round and I still get my favorite America-hating actor.

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 21, 2015, 8:23 pm

Jack Larson, television’s first Jimmy Olsen in ‘Superman’ series, dies at 87

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 21, 2015, 10:25 pm

Golly, Mr White, I can’t believe it!

Comment from thefritz
Time: September 22, 2015, 8:32 pm

Great Caesar’s ghost! we need a winner….

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: September 23, 2015, 8:19 am

It ain’t over till it’s over, but now it is over for Yogi Berra. Which means xul gets dicked! DP Round 76 coming up, Ms. Weasel?

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: September 23, 2015, 11:15 am

Congrats, xul! RIP, Yogi. Neato guy.

Comment from steve
Time: September 23, 2015, 10:01 pm

His wife once asked Berra where he wanted to be buried, in St. Louis, New York or Montclair. ‘I don’t know,’ he said. ‘Why don’t you surprise me?’

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