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Holy shit, I forgot to post…!

I didn’t post yesterday. I clean forgot. First time in the ten years of sweasel.com. What’s more, I didn’t even realize it until I couldn’t sleep and decided to check my own blog on my tablet (note timestamp: 1:24 am. Wait, do you see post times in my time zone or yours?).

Sorry. I’ve been bringing home work. I didn’t think I’d have to do that. Ever again for as long as I lived. But the old dude who used to lay out our annual magazine decided he’s too old, and my boss was all, like, “say, you used to do publication design, didn’t you?”

Yes, yes…that only came up in the context of how much I flipping hated it.

Plus, I’ve got an art show coming up. I stay an associate member of the art club until I show two pieces in an annual show. I decided I hated everything I’ve done and I’ve thrown it all away and started from scratch. I have about a week.

So. Anyway. Excuses are boring. Those are mine. It’s gratifying that you noticed my absence (truly, it is). I don’t suppose it would do me much good if I fell down the stairs, as the emergency personnel would need more than “don’t know her name but she lives somewhere on the South coast of England.” But it’s still good to know if I fell off the earth, it would make a little ripple on the other side of the world.

I should get it all straightened out…in a couple of weeks (sigh).

p.s. Oh, for the record — yes, I have three tablets. Two Kindles, three tablets and an Android phone — and I use them all. HAHAHA! Well, except the first Kindle — the screen broke.

They’ve all been presents from Uncle B over time, but each one has a specific role and a specific place in the house. As you know, the batteries in these devices hate being run all the way down and there’s a constant drain while they search for wifi signal, so I expend a certain amount of daily effort rounding them all up and feeding them. They’re like livestock, really.


Comment from Uncle Al
Time: August 3, 2017, 7:44 pm

I’m very glad the missing post was not the result of, as you said, falling down the stairs. Or something even worse, such as falling into a television induced fugue while watching a “slow” program of Floridian retirees attempting to back out of handicapped parking spaces.

Unnecessary apology accepted (refusing would be rude and ungracious).

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: August 3, 2017, 7:55 pm

We’re great fans of slow television, Uncle Al. Or is that why you brought it up?

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: August 3, 2017, 8:05 pm

Mme. Ermine, Yes, I remembered your mentioning slow TV a little while back and amused myself by creating an imaginary (but not unrealistic) entry in the category, what with my being a retiree living in Florida and all. But I know how to park and un-park unlike some of my neighbors whose driving definitely qualifies as “veryveryvery slow”

FYI – I see your posts’ timestamps, as well as comments’, in your local time zone. At the moment, that’s a four hour difference from where I am.

Comment from peacelovewoodstock
Time: August 3, 2017, 8:14 pm

Well Ms. Stoaty, as this was the first time in 10 years you will be forgiven.

As a change of subject, check out this beautiful little stoat photo I stumbled onto on PopSci.com. http://bit.ly/2vxboLV

Trust me, it’s not a Rick Astley video or pron or anything

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: August 3, 2017, 9:03 pm

Ooooh…what a lovely little beastie! That’s a keeper.

(Why yes, I have a stoats file).

Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: August 3, 2017, 10:41 pm

If you want a greeeeeen way to charge those tablets, I succumbed to the temptation and bought a folio size 4 panel solar recharger I can recommend. Pretty nifty. Been using to recharge this (also #3 by the way) tablet all week.
You DO need sunlight though.
Check out Sunjack on Amazon.

Comment from Can’t Hark My cry
Time: August 4, 2017, 12:03 am

“They’re like livestock, really.”
Oooooooh! What a delicious metaphor! Thanks!

Comment from ea in ga
Time: August 4, 2017, 1:00 am

Take a little break. Pictures of Jack and the chickens and gardening tips from Uncle Badger would be great-for a few days.

Comment from Mr. Dave
Time: August 4, 2017, 1:38 am

We do not have handsome weasels in Weigh Station Closed, Texas and I consider us poorer for that.

Comment from Some Monkey
Time: August 4, 2017, 1:48 am

We still love you Stoaty – please don’t fall on your sword over one missed post:

“Even the monkey sometimes falls from the tree”

Old Japanese proverb

Comment from .
Time: August 4, 2017, 2:07 am

>>Wait, do you see post times in my time zone or yours?

Proxties… But Howdodey Work??!

Answer: It Is All In Settings…

While the new house was being built, I was fixting the old nasty pasture fence but who pulled up but my house builder along with his teenage son.
We were amiably catching up and he pointed at my orange Homer 5 gallon plastic bucket where the hammers, fencing kit, staples, bottle of water were.
“What’s in the bucket, .?”
“My fencing tools”
“No, I do not mean that, it’s alive”
I look around and there is a freaking live weasel jumping around the bucket.
“Oh, that? It’s a weasel”
“You bring a weasel along to fix a fence?”
“No, I do not, this one’s a wild one, I am not sure what he wants”

“… Oh, I see”

A few days before I saw a commotion in tall grass. A fat coon tried to flee and they usually are never in a hurry. This one fled with surprising alacrity and a grim, resigned expression. Around its neck was a long weasel, attempting to drill to his aortas. I do not suffer a coon to live, never have, but a weasel is A-OK in my ledgers. My egg vendor never in 50 years had a weasel kill his birds. ANY OTHER animal has killed his birds, except a sheep.

Too many devices does not security help. Time to trim the herd.

Comment from *not clickbait*
Time: August 4, 2017, 2:26 am

My name a Rick.

Comment from Mitchell
Time: August 4, 2017, 2:28 am

“I do not suffer a coon to live”

Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: August 4, 2017, 12:03 pm

Wouldn’t necessarily a ben better if’n he said he kilt em straight off after he seed em I don’t spect.

And I loved the story.

Reminds me of Uncle Mop from Down East telling his Maine Guide stories.
Though the best ones was about otters, my favorite bein how he took a shoot at one and missed, but got so close to the fellers nose it sucked the air out of his lungs and knocked him over stone cold dead.

Well, that and the one about growing macaroni ( which as any damfool can tell you will NOT grow that far north….)

Comment from Wolfus Aurelius
Time: August 4, 2017, 12:12 pm

Glad to see you back, Stoaty. I see post times in your time zone — it’s 7:10 am Central Sweating Time on Friday as I write this, and your original post was stamped as of 7:27 pm, I presume Thursday, unless you have a time machine.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: August 4, 2017, 12:35 pm

Speaking of coons—my Uncle Oddis raised coon dogs. His favorite, a dog named Diana—was so good, all Uncle Oddis had to do was show her the size board he was gonna use to peg out the coon skin, and Diana would bring back a coon to fit the board. One day his wife’s ironing board broke, and he took it outside to see if he could repair it. Ol Diana—she took off and ain’t been home since.

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: August 4, 2017, 5:33 pm

I swear that half the people in the UK walk around with machetes. There are actual machete gangs. smh…

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 4, 2017, 5:36 pm

Question, if I may – did you whip that graphic up for this oversight or was that already on file for ‘just such an occasion’

and (oh, two questions then eh mr smartass?)

is that weasel art because…day-umm – excellent!

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 4, 2017, 5:38 pm

@ric Fan
Yes, the other half wander around with spray bottles of acid.

while riding about on, or stealing, motor scooters.

so we must outlaw kitchen knives!

Comment from p2
Time: August 4, 2017, 6:18 pm

it appears posting times are WBT….8 hrs ahead of the local here in the frozen freakin north. glad ya havent fallen & cant get up.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 4, 2017, 7:39 pm

Time check – it’s 2:39 here in…..”Central” America (CDT)

So, mean old Greenwich time.

In 1 minute it will be 2:40 Balonia Watchtime

Comment from Allen
Time: August 8, 2017, 8:03 am

My favorite Weasel graphic, Samurai Weasel which was quite some time ago. Wait a minute, I’ve been perusing your blog for that long?

I saw a Japanese proverb up above, maybe someone would like a Finnish proverb that might fit. Some of them can be a bit odd.

“The insane have cheap thrills.”

Comment from Eric Smith
Time: August 17, 2017, 5:19 pm

Scary times in the US now. I’m seeing more and more Americans moving to Canada now. If Canada maybe for you check out my website: http://eric-smith.ca/

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