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Cat picture for scale

So the printer sent me a note today — that big job I was working on last week — saying they couldn’t work with jpegs, could I send .pdfs?

Easy, I thought. I went to pdf school back in the day, I thought. I got this.

Well, not so easy. All the built-in ‘print to pdf’ options only recognize standard copier paper size. These are big posters. But it’s all print to file, so it should be easy to make a custom paper size, right? Nope.

Back when I was in pdf school (she said, leaning back and hooking her thumbs in her lapels), when we ran into a thorny problem, we’d load a generic postscript printer driver, print to .ps file, edit the .ps file in a text editor and use Adobe Distiller to convert to .pdf. Doesn’t look like I can recreate that process without joining up to the dreaded Creative Cloud.

Or maybe I could, but I got tired of chasing my tail. What I did was print to copier paper size at an obscenely high resolution. I hope that translates to big poster at a normal dpi.

Also, I took a snapshot of the kitten with my phone.


Comment from Mark Matis
Time: January 28, 2019, 11:30 pm

If’n you needs to do sumthin’ similar in the future and your current process don’t give the desired results, y’all could dual-boot to Ubuntu 16.04, install GIMP and open the file therein, and print to PDF in whatever size and resolution you might want. Just sayin’.

Dual boot works fine. And you can set it to default to whatever OS you want with Grub Customizer.

Comment from ChristerH
Time: January 28, 2019, 11:34 pm

Or use Gimp for Windows: https://www.gimp.org/downloads/

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: January 28, 2019, 11:52 pm

He looks very soft—and contented.

Comment from Pupster
Time: January 29, 2019, 12:29 am

Printer won’t work with jpegs? For a poster? Seems like a pretty standard print job. Maybe they are cranking the yank?

Comment from Weaseltablet3
Time: January 29, 2019, 1:29 am

Gimp will do it? Huh. I have Gimp.

It’s a freebie, Pups. Mine is not to question why.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: January 29, 2019, 8:49 am

Are you sure GIMP will do that, Mark? I’ve only played with it a few minutes this morning, but it looks like page size is determined by the printer driver…

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: January 29, 2019, 2:37 pm

Under GIMP in Ubuntu 16.04, “File” “Print…” “General” “Print to File” then “Page Setup” “Paper size” and scroll all the way to the bottom of the list to “Manage Custom Sizes…”

I don’t have it installed in Windows 10 since I only use that for a limited number of applications to avoid the malware. If you can’t find it in the Windows version, and if ChristerH can’t help you locate it, let me know and I’ll install it there and figure it out for you.

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: January 29, 2019, 2:53 pm

Then go to “Image Settings” and set the “Size” “Height;” and “Width” that you desire. The “X resolution” and “Y resolution” will automatically change to scale your image to the selected height and width.

Comment from BJM
Time: January 29, 2019, 4:09 pm

Hey Stoatie, didja notice that Epic declared war on Valve, and doing it on Steam was a bold move ya gotta love.

We’re gonna need moar Cheetos.

Comment from DurnedYankee
Time: January 29, 2019, 6:07 pm

I know that cat look.

That’s “Go ahead, rub my tummy – heh, no, really, go on”

Comment from OldFert
Time: January 29, 2019, 7:21 pm

I read the problem description, and the suggested fixes, and found that as I read it, I heard Charlie Brown’s teacher’s voice in my head.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: January 29, 2019, 7:41 pm

Not to worry, Mark. I’ll try it next time I have it fired up, but my stupid bodge worked for now. I heard back from the printer and they’re happy.

Jesus, BJM – who hasn’t tried that? There’s GOG and 2K and…I’m sure there are others. It’s gotten so I won’t buy a game if I have to sign up to another platform.

I know why they all want to be Steam, I just don’t know why I’m expected to go along with it.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: January 29, 2019, 7:43 pm

He’s a very sweet and docile boy, Durned. He will tolerate belly rubs. I’m not sure he likes them, but he’s not a bitey beast.

Comment from DurnedYankee
Time: January 29, 2019, 7:54 pm

Ours, when she’s not hunting the Dachshuahua/Chihuahund (I admit, we are amused) likes to lie in my office chair in the sunlight, and has the most serene sweet kitty look as she rolls over onto her back and kitty smiles at me.

But I am not fooled, at least not more than twice.

I didn’t know that was a thing, but the internet tells me it is. As a lad, we had a cat and apparently she was most un-cat like because I have discovered my ‘cat wisdom’ was no such thing.

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: January 29, 2019, 8:07 pm

Actually, I went to W-10 and installed GIMP for the halibut, and it looks like that won’t work in Billyland. They’re stuck with the Microsoft PDF file driver, which don’t let you do the stuff what you can do in Linux. However, you can install a custom PDF driver for Microslop, such as:
and that one will let you “print” to paper sizes up to 129″ x 129″. There are probably other options out there as well, but I’m too lazy to look…

And their reason for axing for PDF might be to make sure you can’t claim they changed the file you sent ’em and therefor refuse to pay them for their work.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: January 29, 2019, 9:05 pm

No pay, Mark. It’s a freebie. Well, it’s a gubmint printing office — there’s no such thing as a freebie.

We’re a registered charity, and doing us some free posters once a year is a civic good deed. I guess.

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: January 29, 2019, 9:51 pm

Well they still probably do it to keep people from claiming they changed the pitcher in the process of printing it. Most reputable business stationery printers submit their proof in PDF for approval before bulk printing for that reason.

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