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Nertz to you

No, not you…them. You know. Them.

I’m sitting in the lobby of the building next door, soaking up a lovely five-bar wifi signal. I haven’t been over here for ages, but I used to work in this building. So half the people walking by are, like, “hey, Weasel! Where you been?”

“Oh, you know. Over there somewhere. I’m here to steal your wifi.”

“Great! Help yourself.”

And I might, too. I got a new laptop battery for my birthday, which untethers me considerable. O, I have slipped the surly bonds of cubicle.

Yeah. Some time in the recent past, I had a birthday. I’m not going to tell you exactly when. It’s not that I don’t trust you — gosh, you guys are the bestest minions a weasel ever had. Only, I’m one of those paranoid types. Date of birth, mother’s maiden name…brrr. Kryptonite. I believe there’s a bot out there right this minute crawling the web, one measly singularity shy of stitching it all together; sweasel.com plus alt.support.pee-shy plus the Class of ’78 High School Reunion Committee plus my recent credit card records equals…well, I don’t know, exactly. I’m not in a hurry to find out.

The battery came from a place that reconditions them on the cheap. I’m very pleased. They promise substantially longer battery life than a manufacturer’s original battery at about a third of the cost. The instructions recommend completely charging and discharging a new battery at least five times to get it up to the full charge. I’m on cycle #3 at the moment, and currently getting about three hours a go.

Have you ever opened up a laptop battery? Inside, there are…well, batteries. Like regular old rechargeable batteries, taped together in sequence. How the manufacturers have the gall to charge upwards of a Franklin for that is anybody’s guess. I suspect what these guys do is crack open the case and replace those batteries with newer ones of higher spec. You can send them your old one to refill at a very low cost, or buy the whole thing for a bit more. I opted for the latter, so I can use the new battery when I actually need battery power, and use my crappy old one as emergency backup when I’m plugged into the AC. That constant trickle charge is apparently the battery slayer.

Well, I’m babbling. Gosh, it feels grand.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: May 7, 2007, 2:03 pm

All together now: “Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday, dear Weasel,
Happy Birthday to you”

What do you mean, I have to pay royalties now?

Comment from SteamBoat McGoo
Time: May 7, 2007, 2:18 pm

Holy Asparagus! I am feeling especially fond of batteries and lobbies right about now. Last week must have been another of those nasty ol’ ’60s flashbacks.

Weasel, the change in your mood/attitude is profound!!!! It was kind of your friends over in the 5-bar lobby (sounds like a good tavern) to let you make yourself at home.

I, for one, am liking it. Thank you. And Happy Birthday – whenever, and many happy wifi bars.

Comment from Skynet
Time: May 7, 2007, 2:23 pm

alt.support.pee-shy Target aquired, initializing weapon systems…

Comment from SteamBoat McGoo
Time: May 7, 2007, 8:53 pm

Well, we already knew that your blood type is W and that your RH factor is singlemalt. That narrows the field considerably.

Seriously, do you ever do a google/yahoo search on your real name? I’ve done it (on my name) several times to reassure myself its not anywhere it shouldn’t be. So far, so good.

Comment from Leeuwenhoek
Time: May 7, 2007, 10:35 pm

Hi Weasel, nice blog. I have been enjoying it with my morning coffee. I must say, I learned some new things, I’m not sure I wanted to know about though. lol Just thought I would let you know, you write well. 😉

Comment from Leeuwenhoek
Time: May 7, 2007, 10:46 pm

Dang, forgot to say Happy Birth day. The reason I hit the comment button in the first place. All the best.

Comment from Pupster
Time: May 7, 2007, 11:16 pm

Pretty soon us minions are going to need name tags. T-shirts and hats are next. Cotton / Poly blend would be nice, with a front pocket if you can swing it.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: May 8, 2007, 5:30 am

Hey, I read the Microbe Hunters. I know about some of the stuff Anton van Leeuwenhoek peeped at with his little scope. Don’t go putting on airs with me.

That I should clothe minions in a cotton/poly blend! Geez, Pupster — sweat much?

Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: May 8, 2007, 8:27 am

That I should clothe minions in a cotton/poly blend! Geez, Pupster — sweat much?

Okay, maybe not. But hats? Definitely. And I sure could use some more shirts with pockets on the front?

Please? Pretty please? (And I promise to switch to squirrel sammiches instead of stoat ~ long as they’re on rye?)

Comment from Pupster
Time: May 8, 2007, 10:08 am

I’m a sweaty one, that’s for sure. Luckily I sweat through my tongue and the pads on my paws, so I’m OK with 100% cotton, but, they have to be available in XXL sizes. For the COMFORT!

And if you customize one of these with the S.Weasel corporate logo, I’ll buy one or three.

Comment from Skynet
Time: May 8, 2007, 11:08 am

Pupster – you go dawg! Those would be totally sweet with a weasel on them! Come on boss, we gotta get those!

Comment from blanco lagomorph
Time: May 8, 2007, 11:40 am

Me, I’d still like a sandwich.

Comment from blanco lagomorph
Time: May 8, 2007, 11:41 am

although the primarily red flame beanie is pretty sweet

Comment from lizardbrain
Time: May 12, 2007, 8:10 pm

Hey, a birthday was the whole reason for my 646-mile spinal abuse last weekend. If I’d known you were having one, too, I would’ve… um… just done what I did.

Happy Birthday, Stoatie!

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