Friday, June 15
Because the other thread went to the swirly place, tune in here to see if Weasel stays sober enough long enough to learn what happened to the 1957 Plymouth Belvedere that’s been a-molderin’ in the grave for five decades. Me, I’m guessing the tranquilizers in that lady’s purse went bad and the ticket is WAY overdue.
Posted: June 15th, 2007 under blogging, personal.
Comments: 26
Comments
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: June 15, 2007, 8:24 pm
Funny about that car. I was still hopin’ it would be pristine – even when that guy said “its a happy occasion and sad, too” or whatever.
What was it that Hemlock said in Shibumi – “Hope’s cheap, anus. Indulge yourself.” I did.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: June 15, 2007, 8:31 pm
Make that “The Loo Sanction.”
Geeze….I gotta drink some more of that.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 4:36 am
Rusted to bits. The time capsule made it through okay, though…newspapers and everything. They should’ve put the car in a time capsule.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: June 16, 2007, 8:41 am
I think they thought that they *did* put the car in one.
Now those construction engineers were not dumb back then. They knew about water tables, porosity, and sealant aging and integrity issues. I wonder if one was even consulted?
All they had to do is get a big propane tank and weld the car inside it. Suck some soft vacuum and back-fill with a bit of dry nitrogen, and – voila.
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 9:25 am
Dang, shame about the car. 1957 was a very good year for me.
McGoo, I think your conjecture about not consulting an engineer is right on the money.
Sorry to go off topic, but I missed all the fun with the criminal jerk last night. As I mentioned earlier, my wife and I have had the unpleasant experience of dealing with a real honest to goodness stalker, and it sounds like whitishrabbit has acquired one.
I mentioned Proctor’s book at Amazon in my earlier post, and I’ll post some more links in a moment, but I’ll have to be crafty to not get put in detention again.
Unfortunately, Proctor’s book is titled “How to Stop a Stalker,” and while filled with some pretty good info; it doesn’t live up to its title.
In our experience, there are only three ways to stop a stalker. First, realize that he (and it’s almost always a “him,” even though there have been some “hers” as well) is trying to provoke reaction from his victim, and it doesn’t matter to him if it’s a positive or negative response. As long as he’s provoking a reaction, he’s getting the feeling of “control” that is his emotional reward for the behavior. So, the first way to stop him is not providing that emotional high for him: absolutely no response from you or any of friends/family may cause him to move on and leave you alone. And note it’s classic for the perp to claim to be the victim of the stalking.
Second is physical intimidation. And I don’t mean telling him that you are goiing to do something in the indefinite future. If you know somebody that’s Made, or some obliging bikers who might not be terribly in awe of the legal system, or perhaps a rural Sherriff and some deputies that don’t mind getting their hands a little dirty to keep the town clean; they might be willing to carry a message for you. There are two caveats here: there must be no visible connection between you and your agents who go snakeshit on his ass, otherwise it may backfire and give him the emotional response he craves; and it’s very unlikely that there will be a legal pretext for beating the crap out of him, so you’ve just entered into conspiracy to commit battery. This method is sometimes more effective than the first, but the potential legal pitfalls are greater.
And finally, the only method that really works is to kill him. If you live in an area that issues its citizens concealed weapons permits/licenses (CCW), get one. If you don’t already have a carry weapon, get one. Your life may well depend on it.
In my wife’s case, our stalker was stalking her a year before she broke up with him, and it was a year after that that we discovered what was going on. Don’t wait, take action now.
And sorry for being so off topic, but I think whitishrabbit faces a real threat to her safety. And no, I haven’t had a good chance to kill our stalker yet, but if they aren’t dead, they just don’t quit!
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 9:42 am
S’okay. Conversations about shooting people are always welcome at S. Weasel. Unless it’s people who are under the protection of the Secret Service, because I’m a coward like that.
Now, this is off topic: I just saw my cat go running upstairs, a sure sign that something weird is going down at the back door. She’s a very bad attack cat, but an excellent early warning system. Sure enough, there’s a whole family of light brown persons standing silently outside the open door. Five of them of various ages in their Sunday best (with hats), smiling broadly at me.
The youngest says, in very lightly accented English, “do you speak Spanish?” and I say, “no, sorry, I don’t.” And she thanks me and they wander off.
Huh. What the hell?
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 9:48 am
As I promised: another link. This time to Emily Spence-Diehl’s “Stalking: A Handbook for Victims.” It’s not as comprehensive as Proctor’s book, but it’s a good primer. There are also other resources at the NCVC’s “Stalking Resource Center,” an important one being their downloadable log to help you create a paper trail, which is important if you have to take legal action.
Two warnings about trying to get the legal system to help you. A restraining order is only as good as the paper it’s printed on, meaning, its not much of a weapon. And depending on your jurisdiction, the legal machinery may be less than, uh, enthusiastic. We couldn’t get a restraining order in the jurisdiction of my wife’s former home…even after repeated documentation of minor felonies. That district, even though home to several generations of my wife’s family has been so beset by crime in the last decade or so, that they just didn’t have the resources to commit to stopping this guy.
And to whitishrabbit and Dawn: it’s very important to realize that these guys can be extremely charming, persuasive, whatever you want to call it. There just isn’t any way to tell in advance~my wife still occasionally agonizes with guilt about the danger that she put her daughter in: but it’s impossible to tell a sociopath from somebody normal until it’s usually too late.
And Dawn, nice takedown! Although it was McGoo who really nailed what this guy is all about.
And again, apologies to all for hijacking Weasel’s blog and posting such depressing shit when Weasel is sposed to be restesing, but I think it is kind of important here.
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 9:55 am
S’okay. Conversations about shooting people are always welcome at S. Weasel. Unless it’s people who are under the protection of the Secret Service, because I’m a coward like that.
Huh. Some of my best conversations about shooting people have been with guys assigned to USSS protection details. Often involving what ballistics would do to the “principal.”
Huh. What the hell?
Uh, Weasel, you do tend to attract the …
I’m not sure there is a word for it. Outré, perhaps?
Comment from Dawn
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:00 am
There aren’t any brown people in MA. and with hats, you say? People haven’t worn hats with their Sunday best since ’57. Do you think Miss Belvedere is sending you some sort of message from beyond?
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:13 am
Rhode Island, actually. I just never got around to making a “Providence” graphic after I moved. Of course there are brown people here. You don’t think we mow our own lawns, do you?
Definitely hats. I most especially remember the hats.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:17 am
Briefly: Like anyone, I’ve occasioonally had issues with someone. Neighbor. Former associate. Stranger.
The problem with going to the authorities is that you “announce” the situation – and then cannot take unilateral “extra-legal” action if the opportunity presents itself – and one is so inclined. decisions, decisions…
Weasel attracts the outre? (Yeah, I know – the little apostrophe thingy ain’t there. Sue me.)
Well, I’ve been called worse. Recently.
Weasel, I’m still basking in the glory of my new label. I woke up this morning with that delightful phrase in my head. I am smugly content. It’s gonna put a sparkle on the whole day – I just know it.
And it happened right here on Weasels. Woot!
Comment from Dawn
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:22 am
Somehow this fits all three topics at once.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:32 am
From Three A’s:
“Would you say…that there are a plethora of presents, Jeffe?”
One of my favorite movie lines.
Comment from whitishrabbit
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:44 am
Grawg.
EW1- I appreciate the concern, and the info would surely be helpful to someone in a situation.
In all honesty, however, I started this by taking his blog and posting to him on it. I was the initiator.
I’ve never felt I was in danger with Will, and I’ve been in an abusive situation before so I’m somewhat versed in what that resembles.
We’re really fucked up, and probably shouldn’t be wreaking our crap on any other people, but I care about him a lot more than our fisticuffs probably betrays, and vice versa. I’m really hoping our shit will stay out of other people’s spheres, so I’m gonna lay low for awhile.
But he’s not like that. We both have our major issues.
tx for info
and sorry for all the weasel-interruptus
Comment from Dawn
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:52 am
Silly Rabbit! You still love him, too. (shakes head) Girl, I have been where you are and the only person who’s gonna change in this relationship is you. I did not form my opinion of him based on what you said. I read what he wrote way before you hijacked his blog. He has issues!
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 10:52 am
McGoo sez:
The problem with going to the authorities is that you “announce” the situation – and then cannot take unilateral “extra-legal” action if the opportunity presents itself – and one is so inclined.
An important consideration. Which is a second reason why it’s essential that there be no visible connection to the stalker between you and your “agents.” (In the case of a rural Sherriff, howver…the real life example that I know of came about not because of the wishes of the victim, but because the Sherriff decided that he warn’t gonna put up with it in his county.)
It’s too bad that they don’t quit until dead, but I have the advantage of being a former law enforcement officer trained in the use of deadly force: so when a jury is asked what a reasonable person would do, they have to consider that prior experience and training.
So, as far as I’m concerned, it’s just a matter of time.
(Yeah, I know – the little apostrophe thingy ain’t there. Sue me.)
Weasel is actually fairly forgiving about using raw HTML, it’s just the number of links that land me in detention.
For whatever reason, that little mark is called an “acute,”
and I think it works on all vowels:
&[put vowel here]acute;
and it’s a damn lot of work to get just one character, so if it’s missing, no legal action necessary.
I am smugly content. It’s gonna put a sparkle on the whole day – I just know it.
Oh, McGoo! As a Defender of Western Vices, Virtues, and Bad Booze; one should bask in the calumnies of your lessers, sociopaths, and evil morons! Enjoy!
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 11:26 am
silly wabbit:
I appreciate the concern, and the info would surely be helpful to someone in a situation.
Hon, realize it or not, you are in a situation.
In all honesty, however, I started this by taking his blog and posting to him on it. I was the initiator.
Er, no. We all make some dumb mistakes sometimes, and hijacking his blog might have seemed like a fun thing to do: but you didn’t initiate his intruding on this forum and putting his sociopathy on display!
I’ve never felt I was in danger with Will, and I’ve been in an abusive situation before so I’m somewhat versed in what that resembles.
Abuse comes in a variety of forms. I “feel” this guy is potentially more dangerous than a guy who ‘just’ loses his temper. Usually people recognize someone who is physically dangerous and get the hell out. (Not always, obviously. Had a patient years ago whose husband had shot her through the leg, and she refused to press charges!) But guys like criminal jerk are more subtle, and to my mind more dangerous…because everyone around you is at risk.
but I care about him a lot more than our fisticuffs probably betrays, and vice versa.
I do hope you mean “fisticuffs” in a metaphorical sense, otherwise you are in much more danger than I first thought.
We both have our major issues.
That may be, but yours aren’t as apparent on initial inspection as his are.
Do me a favor, download Spence-Diehl’s book from the link above, and read it. It may be that you need psychological help, but you can’t get it if you’re dead!
Again, sorry for being so pessimistic. Obviously, I could be wrong. As my friend and outstanding criminalist John Houde notes, “profilers” are psychobabbleists, so I hesitate to make such black & white judgements on so little evidence.
But I have identified three genuine stalkers just from their internet postings alone, and my wife, so AFIK, I’m 4 for 4 so far.
/And it can’t be considered Weasel interruptus, since we can still talk about shooting people! You saw how I worked that in above?
Comment from Dawn
Time: June 16, 2007, 11:32 am
Jacob Golden – Jacob Golden is the name of the new folk singer!
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 11:41 am
Oh, and you can get my email addy by going over to my blog from the link that Weasel allows. (Come to think of it, Weasel should be able to give it to you directly if you ask him.)
Feel free to contact me that way if you want to discuss offline.
/We now conclude today’s “Weasel Interruptus” dramatic presentation, and return you to your normal outré presentation of “Weasel Resteses!”
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 11:45 am
Jacob Golden?
Why is it that the Pacific Northwest (and I’m not excluding British Columbia!) was afflicted with so many hippies?
And why do I still have to suffer them?
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 12:20 pm
Did I mention that one of my other nic’s was Threadkiller!
Sorry.
Technical question to the Weasel: I had to turn off comments on my blog. Light traffic, high spam: you have more traffic than I do but you also seem to manage the spam better. And we’re both running WordPress, what gives?
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 1:26 pm
I didn’t realize you had a blog until you said something! Do you want some link, or would you rather not feel pressured to update more often?
I use the Akismet spam filter plugin, which is brilliant. Every once in a while it lets one through or quarantines one wrongly, but it gets it right 95% of the time. And it learns when you unquarantine something.
It’s free for personal use (if you’re making less than $500 a month on your blog — Ha! Ha!).
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 1:39 pm
Errr…that wasn’t a crack on your blog, btw. You make at least as much as I do on mine 🙂
Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: June 16, 2007, 1:51 pm
I didn’t realize you had a blog until you said something! Do you want some link, or would you rather not feel pressured to update more often?
Bloody hell. Only reason I mentioned it was so whitishrabbit could find me offline, if she wishes.
Having been on the point of death for many months, I finally did what a Vermonter or good Scot would do, and whittled it off. Which leaves me in my present, favored, state: Unemployed and drunk.
So no, thanky, but I would not care for any of them “linky” things that go my blog. Should it be that I find my circumstance changed in future, I will remember your offer.
But I will look at that “Akismet” thingie, it would be nice if my quarterly visitor would stop sending me emails that say”Your commenting is turned off!” (No Sh**, Sherlock. Didya miss the notice that is right out there on the Internet for anybody who can manage 300 baud to see?)
Thanks, Weasel. Have a nice restes. Think I’ll take a nap, as the EW1 will have to go on watch soon.
Comment from whitishrabbit
Time: June 16, 2007, 5:27 pm
Dawn-
I don’t. I guess, I realize, I don’t love him. I love who he was at the beginning. But he’s really not that person anymore. We’ve passed the point of no return numerous times. You know, that part where if you loved someone you’d not drive the knife in. If you really care and they’re hurting you don’t try to make them hurt worse.
I wanted to take some responsibility, I guess. But when I take a long, hard Iook at the things that have gone on between us, the truth is I did give of myself to the best of my ability and met with a sort of twisted anger and witholding in return.
How good do those convents pay, anyway?
I probably don’t want the answer.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 16, 2007, 5:29 pm
They don’t pay all that well, but they have a fantastic dental plan.
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