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I am so not shitting you

And by “not shitting you” I mean “nobody in this house is allowed to take a shit for the foreseeable future.”

This is our weather forecast as is, was and ever shall be. Have I mentioned the moat?

Okay, it’s not really a moat. We just call it that. It used to be part of a network of drainage ditches that served to control runoff from the farm and pasture lands around us. Now many of them are cutoff and stand alone. Filling with water.

Filling and filling and filling.

Our sewage empties into it. Only, we don’t have a boring old septic system. We have a complex, computer-controlled shit processing factory. And the water level is now within five inches of the outlet.

God knows what happens if the water overtops the outlet. I’m guessing the central computer sings “Bicycle Built for Two” while attempting to shut down our life support systems. Stay tuned!

TOMORROW COMES THE DEAD POOL. I’m going to set it up to auto-post at 6pm Zulu Time. That’s 1pm on the East Coast and 10am on the Left Coast. Remember, no matter who you had before, it all starts again fresh — you have to show up and pick again. Let’s see if we can’t bring BlueHost to its knees!


Comment from Gromulin
Time: February 25, 2010, 10:35 pm

GB uses Farenheit? I though all of Europe was metric.
Are all the measurements like the US, or some horrifying mix of metric clocks and miles-per-hour?

Why yes, I AM an ignoramus.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: February 25, 2010, 10:37 pm

Well, if you and UB need any Gators for that moat, I have just the place….


Good luck, and watch your fingers…..

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 25, 2010, 10:47 pm

No, you have to punch a button to see it in Farenheit and miles per hour, Gromulin. I always, always do it…I just know some BBC functionary counts the number of users who don’t want metric and mutters darkly.

Sadly, though, it’s pretty solidly metric everywhere. I have real difficulty navigating.

Comment from Allen
Time: February 25, 2010, 11:34 pm

It will start beeping like a truck that’s backing up then start running in reverse.


I’ve got a couple choices for my pick, but I just can’t decide. One of them surprised me in two ways. First, he’s that old, and second he’s still kicking?

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: February 25, 2010, 11:37 pm

As do I, Gromulin – along with anybody else over 20.

The BASTARDS used metrication as part of a Gramscian plan. If you remove people’s cultural reference points and shared experiences, it makes it easier to slip other shit into their sandwich. They get so used to change, they barely notice.

The plan in the UK has been to make the country as unfamiliar as possible to its inhabitants. This isn’t change for change’s sake – it has had a very calculated and deliberate purpose. Once you get the people talking centimetres and Centigrade and kilometers per hour, how easy it is to remove replace the Home Office it with a ‘Ministry of Justice’ (just like you get in a real banana republic), abolish trial by jury, scrap habeas corpus, double jeopardy, degrade Common Law and so all the rest of the fun stuff that the Marxists have inflicted on us in the past decade or so.

Sorry? Was I ranting?

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: February 26, 2010, 2:16 am

Ugh…on the “septic” system, that is. I can’t wait for the dead pool!

Who to choose, who to choose?

Comment from Pavel
Time: February 26, 2010, 3:00 am

Here I’ve been all grumpy about not being able to see Pikes Peak when I get up in the morning because of the suckass weather. Then I met a man who could not flush.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: February 26, 2010, 3:39 am

LOL…. What part of town are you on, Pavel?

Comment from Pavel
Time: February 26, 2010, 4:10 am

Manitou, Scubafreak. You in God’s Own Chosen Country, too?

Comment from Scott Jacobs
Time: February 26, 2010, 4:35 am

I envision the computer crooning “Daisey, Daisey, give me your answer, do” as it fills your front yard with poo-juice…

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: February 26, 2010, 4:45 am

Security, working in Denver

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: February 26, 2010, 5:07 am

12 central?? I probably won’t even get home until 8! (I just got assigned to a new project requiring me to work lotsa extra hours.) All the good ones will be gone by then. 🙁

And sure, I *surf* from work. But I don’t *comment* from work. That is the Rubicon. This far, and no farther!!!111!!

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: February 26, 2010, 5:27 am

the commute is a pain, but the pay is better than what they offer in the Springs…

Comment from Pavel
Time: February 26, 2010, 5:46 am

Cool. I got much family in Fountain, just down the road.

Me, twentysome years in Denver, then I came back home. There’s no joy at all like that of looking out on the great grand Mountain of the Sun.

Comment from JC
Time: February 26, 2010, 6:50 am

You’ve heard, no doubt, about the new US Embassy in London, which will feature a moat. No link, indeference to the almighty spamscreen, but there’s a bit of chat about it at AoSHQ.
BTW, it looks like y’all on the other side of the water are following suit in the TEA party fun, or so I read in the Telegraph, Daniel Hannen’s byline.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 26, 2010, 12:19 pm

No signs of a Tea Party over here that I can see, JC. But judging from blog traffic, there’s a simmering pool of dangerous resentment bubbling under the surface. The big question is, how big is it and where will it go?

Cameron, the pretend leader of the Tories, is a Thatcher-denying, global-warmist Lefty ass. And he’ll get in pretty much by default.

Hey, Mrs P — since you were the only responder to the what time? question, I’ll let you pre-choose your pick. Because fair play is for people who don’t have a blog…

Comment from Wiccapundit, the Red State Witch
Time: February 26, 2010, 3:43 pm

“Open the water closet doors, HAL.”

“I’m sorry, Stoaty, but I can’t do that.”

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: February 26, 2010, 5:45 pm

That’s OK Mrs Peel. Just name anyone and I’ll get clan badger to bump ’em off for you 😉

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