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Big dumb boy

Wow. Lindsey Graham is a hard man to caricature. Turns out, if you exaggerate any of his features, the result looks less like him. Fundamentally, everything about the guy is squish.

So I just made him shiiiiiiny.

Dear future visitors to this post: Lindsey Graham has said that free speech should have limitations.

Dear Republicans of South Carolina: DO BETTER NEXT TIME. KTHXBAI.

Though, if I’m reading it right, “next time” is 2014? Oof!

While we’re on the topic of speech, you do realize if the crowded theater really is on fire, you have every right to shout “FIRE!” in a crowded theater — and, in some places, a legal obligation to do so? Which makes shouting “FIRE!” in a theater you do not believe to be on fire less of a speech issue and more of a fraud issue, as far as I’m concerned. Like saying, “I’m a doctor; let me give you a breast exam” or “will you assassinate my wife for $10,000” aren’t really First Amendment issues.

Sorry for the digression, but that whole “FIRE!” thing gets on my nerves. It’s lazy and sloppy.

Comments


Comment from Mike C.
Time: April 5, 2011, 10:39 pm

Stick to the example of libel – not as simple, but a lot more solid. Incitement to riot is preety good, too.

And Ms. LG is a moron.


Comment from Mark Matis
Time: April 5, 2011, 10:46 pm

It may be lazy, and it may be sloppy. But that’s what makes it so “Lindsey.”


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 5, 2011, 10:51 pm

What do Constitutional Rights, a Soap bubble and Virginity all have in common?

One PRICK and they’re all gone….


Comment from Pupster
Time: April 5, 2011, 10:54 pm

BIG (dumb) BOY!

Excellent ‘shop, Weasey.


Comment from David Gillies
Time: April 5, 2011, 10:59 pm

The ‘crowded theatre’ meme is one of those handy rhetorical cues that let you know without further examination that the person speaking is a complete, drooling moron. And Oliver Wendell Holmes was a nasty, proto-fascist little shit, not all that keen on free speech and grotesquely over-rated by history. He’d fit right in with the current crop of demagogues, glad-handing welfare hucksters and race-baiting assholes that infests Congress.


Comment from Uncle Monkey
Time: April 5, 2011, 11:46 pm

NO SECRET SAUCE – NO!


Comment from Bruno Braun
Time: April 5, 2011, 11:48 pm

mmmm, special sauce….


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 5, 2011, 11:51 pm

Ann Lambert is about to become famous. Part 1 is chock full of awesome Lindsey beatdown. Part 2 features a Koran. Some people might be offended.


Comment from Mark Matis
Time: April 6, 2011, 12:51 am

Barnhardt, not Lambert. And Keepvid.com is a good way to save that for posterity lest TPTB decide to crush her. By the way, she is asking for others to follow her lead and let our fine friends of the Religion of Peace understand what we think of their prohibitions on free speech:
http://barnhardt.biz/


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 6, 2011, 1:27 am

Of course, you’re correct, Mark. What’s disturbing me most is that I have no idea where that particular brain fart came from.


Comment from JC
Time: April 6, 2011, 1:31 am

David is 100 per cent.correct about Holmes.O’T (not that that’s usually a problem here):
http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/List_of_weapons_that_don%27t_exist,_but_should#Radioactive_Zombie_Badger_Launcher


Comment from Mark Matis
Time: April 6, 2011, 1:41 am

Hey, Pablo – Maybe you’re an unintended victim of whatever mind ray the Government has been using on those news readers:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1372538/Are-government-microwave-mind-control-tests-causing-TV-presenters-brains-melt-down.html


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 6, 2011, 2:17 am

MARK – Even worse… Amy Winehouse has announced her intention to reproduce this year….

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/people/news/amy-winehouse-wants-a-baby-2263071.html


Comment from Nina
Time: April 6, 2011, 4:11 am

You guys just don’t get it do you? I get all the free speech I want, it’s y’all who need to just hush, because what I have to say is important and noble an’ stuff, while you wingnut tea partiers are just morons.

Or something like that.

🙂


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 6, 2011, 11:46 am

I didn’t make it all the way through the Barnhardt thing. Too long. But I did like the way she used strips of bacon as bookmarks. Nice.

Her video won’t be an issue over there, I bet. They seem to pick their things-to-be-offended-by almost at random.

Imam: riot!
Congregatation: ULULULULU!


Comment from Mark Matis
Time: April 6, 2011, 11:59 am

Eh, then maybe mine will be. Taking her suggestion that others do this as well. There won’t be bacon in mine, at least not the first one. Hate to waste something that good. And it will be a few days before I can make the video, since Korans are not readily available in the stores around where I live. But come next week, I’ll be starring on YouTube!


Comment from Mitchell
Time: April 6, 2011, 7:50 pm

She might get off on a technicality – if she’s reading / burning from an english translation then it isn’t really “The Koran”. Only those that are in arabic qualify as The Real Deal.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 6, 2011, 8:48 pm

Nope — she specifically said it as English one side of the page, Arabic the other, so it was a proper Koran.


Comment from Lemur King
Time: April 8, 2011, 3:55 pm

Big Boy’s Buffet Breakfast will never seem appetizing again, but it is still a wonderful piece of work.

As Steve Martin once asked: Is it ethical to yell ‘movie’ in a crowded firehouse?

Wait, Winehouse is going to reproduce? Asexually or the normal way?

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