They’ve dug up the Gipper!
George Gipp (1895-1920) All American football player. Died of pneumonia and may or may not have said the following:
I’ve got to go, Rock. It’s all right. I’m not afraid. Some time, Rock, when the team is up against it, when things are wrong and the breaks are beating the boys, ask them to go in there with all they’ve got and win just one for the Gipper. I don’t know where I’ll be then, Rock. But I’ll know about it, and I’ll be happy.
Which was immortalized in Knute Rockne, All American, with Ronald Reagan in the role of Gipp. Which is why…etcetera.
Anyhoo! Somebody dug him up this Fall to see if he was that somebody’s babydaddy. Which he wasn’t. ESPN was invited to film the exhumation, which sounds like it was very badly done. Messy. Bad feelings and lawsuits all around.
I’m pretty sure that quote is bogus. I’m pretty sure most deathbed quotes are bogus. Surely, nobody dies talking about football, unless it’s a hammer murder.
I bet you anything the vast majority of last words are something
along the lines of, “HOLY SHIT MARGARET I’M DYING!!!!”
Posted: February 15th, 2008 under movies, personal, politics.
Comments: 45
Comments
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 4:01 pm
Best comment spam of the day:
Good day! dudes please tell me where can I found free porno
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 4:20 pm
You get good spam, Weaz.
I hope I die so fast I don’t have time for comments.
being at ground zero of a 20 megaton’er would be about right.
Comment from A freind (with a painted mustasche) ~^~
Time: February 15, 2008, 4:33 pm
Hey – it could have been worse for the Gipper!
They only dug him up, rubbed a litte DNA off the end of his tally-wacker and stuck him back in the dirt.
Now, Oliver Cromwell – They dug HIM up after he’d been dead two years and stuck his head on a pole.
Apparently, they were pretty damn’d mad at him.
(I keep this little fact on the wall of my office, framed, as a reminder that no matter how bad things are they can always get worse)
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 4:40 pm
Didn’t the Inquisition actually disinter (that spelling looks wrong) a guy and hang him up (well, his corpse, anyway) and flog him? Or was that a dream?
Hey! Mustache is spelled wrong too! So it can’t possibly be anyone I know….hmmmm.
Ya know – they ought to just make it policy to take a dab of DNA from every corpse from now on. It’s the only way to be sure. Make the sample SMALL-sized so we can store billions of ’em without having to build a friggin’ city for the storage bank.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 5:08 pm
Well, duh. How about decoding every corpse’s DNA and just storing the info? Duh… The cost for decoding is dropping rapidly. It could become a reality…
Comment from Muslihoon
Time: February 15, 2008, 5:37 pm
Next you’ll be advocating the Glorious Return of Christ by cloning Him from the Shroud of Turin.
Lots of rapture-hoping Christianists will be sorely disappointed, I tell you, if He returns in such a mundane manner. Er, relatively mundane.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 6:02 pm
They’ll be more disappointed when the DNA sample creates the medieval equivalent of a hobo, murdered to manufacture a relic.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 6:26 pm
Ouch! I figure the only DNA they’ll recover off the S of T is some flax plant genes.
That would be interesting though. There are enough supposed samples of “Christ’s blood” etcetera; we should clone all of ’em and see what we get.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:22 pm
My favorite relic is the Holy Prepuce. Worryingly, several of them have turned up. Several jokes come to mind there, but I’m going to hell enough as it is.
Cops are outside my back door shaking down some kid, incidentally. It doesn’t seem too angsty, but they’ve been searching her car for half an hour and it looks like they’re going to tow it away.
I’m generally a law-and-order kind of weasel, but Providence cops are bad news. And I’d like to get the cats in.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:29 pm
Yep. There goes the tow truck.
They searched her trunk on the spot. I couldn’t quite make out what they said to her, but I’m guessing they told her she’d be in trouble if she didn’t give them permission.
This is where I go all ACLU up on they ass.
Comment from A Freind shrouded in Mystery
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:29 pm
The Shroud of Turin makes very interesting reading.
EVERYONE (including the Catholic Church, by the way) agrees that the damn’d (or bless’d, as the case may prove to) thing is a fake.
Except that nobody can figure out how the fake was made. And a very, very good fake it is too. Particularly around the eyes,the Eyes, the EYES. Kind of creepy, actually…
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:50 pm
The Holy Prepuce?
Holy Doughnut, Weaz, how many of them were around back then? Wiki says 1-2 dozen. Whoa. I guess one could use ’em for a pinky ring.
What’re they shaking her for – drugs? Or maybe the car is hot.
Shroud of Turin. Heh.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:51 pm
I’ve always been a fan of the Shroud. A body wrapped in linen is the only way I can imagine reproducing it, hence my belief in the Hobo Sacrifice.
How they produced the burst of energy that seared the image into the cloth is…anybody’s guess.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2008, 7:54 pm
Now, the Weasel of Turin…
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 8:07 pm
Yes!
Burst of energy = flatulence.
It would be just like his hobo buddies to note the outgassing of the corpse and – well – light it.
Y’know – for science….
Comment from pajama momma
Time: February 15, 2008, 8:08 pm
Now, the Weasel of Turin…
I BELIEVE! I BELIEVE!
*takes another toke
Comment from Muslihoon
Time: February 15, 2008, 9:21 pm
Heh. Learn something new every day, I do. I had always thought everyone thought it was real because no one could prove it was faked.
And I did not know that prepuce meant foreskin.
True story: when I was reading a translation of the Qur’an, I came across the word “forelock”. I asked my parents what it meant, and they both refused to explain it. They seemed quite embarrassed. I think they thought I said “foreskin” rather than “forelock”, which would also explain why they did not want to or could not explain it. I’d never seen a foreskin, so how could they explain it? The Qur’an talks about leading people by the forelocks (I think to Hell). Or at least the stuffy translations do.
Mark my words: when someone comes out with a “street” translation of the Qur’an, bookstores the world over will go down in flames. Either by Act of Allah or rampaging Muslim mobs (but mostly rampaging Muslim mobs).
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 15, 2008, 10:08 pm
Musli,
I’m never gonna read the word forelock the same again.
‘Leading them by the forelock…’ Heh.
And the world already is going down in flames…one city at a time.
Comment from Muslihoon
Time: February 15, 2008, 11:45 pm
So either Allah will drag us by the hair or…on second thought, perhaps it’s good circumcision is performed on Muslims. I’m immune!
Comment from porknbean
Time: February 15, 2008, 11:53 pm
So when ya’ll blashphemers die and wind up looking into the face of the Lord as you sail right past to the Gates of Hell, I’ll be laughing my arse off….as I greet you with a cup of brimstone.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 16, 2008, 10:10 am
Awwww…man! I don’t want to go to Hell. Too much fambly there…
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 10:25 am
As Sam Hall complained, “All the whores are down in Hell!”
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 10:38 am
Not being a reference to your fambly Weaz – of course. You know what I meant…
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 16, 2008, 10:43 am
Hahaha…I didn’t even catch that, McGoo! It wouldn’t be entirely inapplicable.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 12:40 pm
This’ll be the third time I’ve tried to comment this morning.
Long story short: I know how you feel about certain fambly members,Weaz.
Look up “tinker’s damn” – I don’t give one about certain fambly members, and I suspect you don’t either.
Comment from Lokki
Time: February 16, 2008, 1:01 pm
Steamboat –
Akismet and I were up rather late last night… he wouldn’t get out of his bunk to post anything for me either… till I waved the last shot of whiskey over him (well, he thought it was the last) and threatened to drink it myself…
AS for your earlier quote of Sam Hall – I prefer the Samuel Clemens quote:
“Heaven for Climate; Hell for Companionship.”
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 1:13 pm
I like that quote, Lokki. Crisp and to the point.
BTW: whenever I finish off the whiskey, I simply tell my drinking companion(s) that “my share was on the bottom and theirs was in the way.”
Comment from Lokki
Time: February 16, 2008, 4:00 pm
One of my Japanese friends explained why a Japanes man always pours the beer out of the bottle for his drinking companion. (The custom there is large beer bottles and small glasses and you pour for each other).
The best part of a bottle of beer is in the middle of the bottle. The stuff at the top is too thin, and the all the sediment settles to the bottom of the bottom. So, you pour the thin stuff for the other guy, and then pour your own out of the center. The art comes in because the other guy wants the same thing and will try to pour for you. So, you have to time your drinks, because when there’s any space in the glass, the other guy will top off your glass, trying to get the good part for himself.
I think your whiskey theory is pretty similar…. I’ll remember it.
Comment from porknbean
Time: February 16, 2008, 4:40 pm
The best part of a bottle of beer is in the middle of the bottle.
So what if you gently tip the bottle upside down and back a few times to mix up the sediment, weak stuff, middle stuff?
Comment from porknbean
Time: February 16, 2008, 4:44 pm
Oh crap, family in hell. I think I will immediately change my ways whilst there is still time.
Comment from Lokki
Time: February 16, 2008, 4:52 pm
I don’t know about family in hell, but you’d certainly beter change your ways and stop shaking up the damn’d beer!
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 5:48 pm
Yeah – no shaking. Although PnB did say gently. Isn’t it the Germans that roll their next bottle gently on the table – mixing up all the layers? I think my Sis told me that. She lived over there for years.
Yep, the whiskey theory is similar except that “yours” is always underneath that of others, so you have to drink theirs to get to yours.
Comment from Pupster
Time: February 16, 2008, 7:18 pm
What…no restesing for the weaselly?
I thought about Stoaty and her Thanksgiving dress-shopping episode today, because I had to go buy a sport coat today for a business trip next week. Classic navy-blue-blazer-brass-button jobby, just like the grown-ups wear.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 7:27 pm
Whoa, Pupster. Mucho observant. I confess I did not notice. I bet she’s setting up her campsite downstairs.
Congrats on the blazer. Wait until they let you sit at the big folks table at dinner! It’s neat! I got to once, but … well … I misbehaved.
Comment from porknbean
Time: February 16, 2008, 7:56 pm
Yes! Rolling sounds much better than what I suggested. But then I am unsophistimacated when it comes to booze. Can’t stand the taste.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 16, 2008, 8:57 pm
I figure rolling one’s beer while drinking at one of those Oktoberfest thingys could be cool.
But if you didn’t drink fast it would get warm. But Eurotypes drink their beer warmer than us Yanks anyway.
(Some say ‘Mericans drink their beer cold to kill the taste, but I think that’s just Euro-snobbery.)
I guess I could roll my scotch bottle. But scotch doesn’t settle. Even (ugh) blends.
Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: February 16, 2008, 9:02 pm
Yeah, a marked absence of weasel about this place, if you ask me.
It went for a tramp in the woods today, I gather.
They’ll have the stitches out sometime in March.
Comment from lokki
Time: February 16, 2008, 10:46 pm
Who was it that said beware of ventures requiring new clothes or rolling the bottle?
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 17, 2008, 12:21 am
Is there reason for worry, Badger? It’s late.
Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: February 17, 2008, 7:15 am
I meant the tramp 😉
Weasel bites are nasty.
Sorry about that, McGoo.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 17, 2008, 8:19 am
Duh. I get it now. I feel so … stupid. You’d think the feeling would be familiar by now.
But I still see no mustalid.
Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: February 17, 2008, 8:39 am
Jesus Hercules Christ!
I had just read the words ‘But still I see no mustalid’ when that very instant the beast skyped me.
That’s, um, spooky.
Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: February 17, 2008, 1:37 pm
Badger – according to Christopher Moore, in Lamb – the ‘H’ stands for ‘Hallowed’.
If you haven’t read the book, get it. It will have you rolling on the floor – literally. I’ve read it about six times and still laugh out loud at some parts.
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