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Hey, how about a tall, frosty glass of…

What the hell…?




Well, actually, it’s Orangina (and very nice it is, too), but I have to stop and remember that whenever I open the fridge.

Wednesday is Life Drawing class, so I’ve been spending the last few hours staring at a naked lady. The model was a couple of minutes late, and she swept in with a little old blue-haired lady in tow.

“I have my mother with me tonight. She can just sit in the back, if that’s okay.”

The whole class froze. The embarrassment threshold of British people is generally set somewhere well below sea level. Then a little voice to my right piped, “I’m just going down the pub. See you in a couple of hours!”


Comment from QuasiModo
Time: November 16, 2011, 11:41 pm

Yeah, see you at the pub! 🙂

Comment from Cobrakai99
Time: November 17, 2011, 12:14 am

Is the little voice buying?

Comment from JeffS
Time: November 17, 2011, 12:32 am

Be glad the little old blue-haired lady didn’t strip and pose for your class.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 17, 2011, 12:32 am

I have to confess that Orangina is ackshly (gasp!) FRENCH!

It is one of the Badger’s fave soft drinks though… second only to Sanpellegrino Limonata.

Champagne tastes? Beer money?


Comment from Joan of Argghh!
Time: November 17, 2011, 2:11 am

We had our female model bail on us, so last night we were awarded with a David of a man. An affable, dark-featured and handsome man in a mellowing prime of youthful 30-something. With deep-set eyes and an attractive smattering of dark chest hair, he was all that. And a good model.

Thankfully, neither of his parents were there.

Comment from Can’t hark my cry
Time: November 17, 2011, 2:18 am

“Our Bev is doing real well since she started the Art School
She always dresses in black and tries to look so cool
But when she gets there
She puts her clothes on the chair
And she just keeps as still as she can
Oh, her wicked ways will have us all inthe workhouse.”
From “Workhouse,” by Jez Lowe. . .too bad I can’t find a You Tube!

Comment from EZnSF
Time: November 17, 2011, 2:26 am

LOL. I love this blog.

Comment from Deborah
Time: November 17, 2011, 2:41 am

What EZnSF said.
Too bad you couldn’t draw the model’s face beside her mother’s face. What a special drawing that would be.

Comment from catnip
Time: November 17, 2011, 3:14 am

Yes! I love the lightness of Sanpellegrino’s sparkling drinks and slightly prefer the Aranciata. They’re not very expensive in the U.S., are sold by the case at Costco, half lemon, half orange.

As a child, I sat for a life class, wearing a little sundress. It was insanely boring. The models deserve every penny they earn doing nothing.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: November 17, 2011, 4:03 am

I’ve had San Pellegrino fruit sparklers and they are quite good. Not sure if I’ve had Orangina.

Comment from Allen
Time: November 17, 2011, 5:55 am

I must admit what I love about the Brits, is their simultaneous restraint coupled with their exuberance.

Well boys, we’re off to Afghanistan to teach them a thing or two, but save a round for yourself. Oy vey what was it, Chelmsford, then Disraeli? Who are these Zulus?

Comment from Allen
Time: November 17, 2011, 6:02 am

While I think of it, NAAFI. I was attached to the Green Jackets many moons ago. Two things I remember, Fioina’s picture on the can of beer, and some special places in way, way south.

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: November 17, 2011, 7:07 am

If it’s endorsed by Badgers, I shall have to track some Orangina down.

Comment from Oceania
Time: November 17, 2011, 9:59 am

Humans are the ugliest of all animals on the Planet.

Comment from Ric Locke
Time: November 17, 2011, 11:50 am

Nah, Oceania, though it’s possible to see how you came to that conclusion. You need to get rid of your mirror and go out and expand your sample size.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 17, 2011, 12:05 pm

Ugly overload.

Comment from ermine
Time: November 17, 2011, 2:43 pm

During breaks our models would often go ’round looking at our nekkid drawrings of them, a bit awkward it was, more so if they were attractive…rare as that was.

Comment from Mrs. Hill
Time: November 17, 2011, 3:00 pm

Oooh! I used to help bottle that stuff!

Honest. Once upon a time, I did quality control for a bottling plant in Havre de Grace, MD, and Orangina was one of their contracts. Those little teardrop bottles were the very devil to keep moving — every now and then, one would just pop off the conveyor like a watermelon seed. The people on the line hated it for that. It was my favorite, though, because I had to test each run periodically for carbonation: shake up a light bulb, puncture the cap with the pressure gauge, record reading, dispose of sample, burp.

Comment from Mrs. Hill
Time: November 17, 2011, 3:25 pm

The floor of the studio where I took figure drawing was always covered in charcoal. If the model’s pose bared a sole, it was jet black — and of course I put that bit in; how could I resist?

Comment from Redd
Time: November 17, 2011, 3:50 pm

I remember that Orangina’s jingles used some sort of weird instrument that sounded like bed springs squeaking.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: November 17, 2011, 4:36 pm

My favorite soft drink moment comes from living in Japan (many years ago) where foreign celebrities are a lot more comfortable endorsing products than they are (well, used to be anyhow) here in the states.

There is a feremented milk (yes!) Soft drink popular in Japan called Calpis. I had the great pleasure of seeing the -entire- Osmond family dancing in a chrous line and singing “Cow piss!, Cow piss!, Cow piss!”.

The company later actually tried marketing the stuff in the states for a while, wisely renamed but not sooo wisely renamed as Calpico a name that suggests an understanding and misunderstanding of the problem at the same time;-)

I’m told the stuff isn’t bad, but I wouldn’t know personally.

Comment from beasn
Time: November 17, 2011, 4:48 pm

Where are the nekkid men?

Comment from beasn
Time: November 17, 2011, 4:50 pm

You need to get rid of your mirror and go out and expand your sample size.

Silly Ric, you have assumed it is human.

Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: November 17, 2011, 5:09 pm

Oceania’s projecting his own self-image on to the rest of us humans.

Anyhoo, At one time I had aspirations towards advanced doodling, and I needed a hu-manatee credit, so I took a general art class. At first it was all negative space and contrast and such, but then they brought out the nekkid people. I had no idea that this was going to happen, as it was just a first year art class.

The first model was rubenesque hippy-chick and I was mildly embarrassed, but I dutifully scrawled on the page. The next one was this magnificent black dude who looked like he was chiseled out of basalt. I almost fainted. He was beautiful. He had no clothes on.

I instantly reverted to my 12 yr old self and spent the rest of the time blushing and glancing surreptitiously at him. It’s possible that I managed to chalk in the general idea of a foot, but otherwise I was too busy trying not to giggle and make a spectacle of myself.

The teacher was not impressed by my lack of effort, when actually I should’ve received some kind of medal for the supreme effort of restraining my own immaturity.

Comment from Anonymous
Time: November 17, 2011, 7:53 pm

As a guy…I hated sketching the guy models. Prolly basic male sexual programming but aesthetically ladies win. Also, the guys were far to worried about action poses that they couldn’t hold long enough for a decent rendering.
(oops, its me, ermine)

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 17, 2011, 8:49 pm

Yes, I suspect for these hobby classes, they avoid having male models for just that reason. As a general rule, women aren’t as bothered by naked ladies as men are by naked men.

Comment from Jon
Time: November 17, 2011, 9:04 pm

Even better than Orangina, in my opinion, is the delightfully named Oran-Soda. I added a reviewing website as my namelink.

It looks like it might only be available from the bottler in Italy, but perhaps I missed a link.

Comment from BigBluBug
Time: November 17, 2011, 9:44 pm

I’m trying to learn how to sketch using books authored by a gentleman named Jack Hamm. Can ms swealse or anyone else suggest some good “teach yourself some sketching” books.

It’s getting a bit frustrating since I know what scenes I’d like to draw but they all end up looking like beatrix potter does flying zombie rabbits. Or night of the living undead swan that was deformed in a boating accident.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 17, 2011, 9:53 pm

I’d pay folding money for Potter’s flying zombie rat undead swan boating accident, Bugs.

Loomis is another good one, and his books are available for free as .pdf’s. Once again, I’m going to recommend the Concept Art Forums, which is the best online art resource I know. Lots of good hints and tips and downloads, plus you can get excellent, helpful critique in the Critique Center forum (or just watch other people get critiqued; most of the advice is the same for noobs).

There is no possible way your skill level is below the lowest there, I promise. And the best there are inspiring.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 17, 2011, 10:16 pm

Eh. Sorry about that, Jon. I just spotted you in the spam bucket. Don’t know what the filter didn’t like about you, but it’s got an itchy trigger finger.

Comment from JC
Time: November 17, 2011, 11:52 pm

Damn classrooms were always freezing.
Even in the Houston summer.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 18, 2011, 12:36 am

Golly, there are some interesting people on this blog!

Comment from Nina
Time: November 18, 2011, 12:46 am

There sure are!

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: November 18, 2011, 5:56 am

Beatrix potter does flying zombie rabbits.

New science fiction/action adventure/fairy tale series.
I’ll have to tell America’s 1St Sgt. about this!!!!

Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: November 18, 2011, 6:42 am

Reminds me of the children’s book Bunnicula. I’m rather surprised no one has made a 3D version of it, starring one of Hef’s girlfriends.

Comment from BigBluBug
Time: November 18, 2011, 3:47 pm

Reminds me of the children’s book Bunnicula.

Was that like the children’s book “Watership Drowned:
General Woundwort’s watery revenge”?

PS. Feynmangroupie is now my hero. Please allow anonymous comments on your blog so I may pester you with inanities.

Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: November 19, 2011, 5:19 am


I haven’t had a blog since 2005. I couldn’t handle the emotional highs and lows of waiting for people to comment. If I had one though, I would revel in the inanities 😀

“Watership Drowned” brings to mind the book “In Harm’s Way” about the survivors of the USS Indianapolis. Only now I have a creepy mental juxtaposition of the bloody-thirsty bunny in Monty Python’s Holy Grail and the aforementioned story.
I don’t think I’ll bother with sleep for the next couple of nights.

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