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This isn’t a Photoshop, either

This old snapshot is Kim Jong-il and Kim Jong-un, having what probably passes for fun in a psycho dictator family. Geez, talk about your awkward family photos.

Right. I’m going to queue up the Dead Pool to autopost for tomorrow. Which means — I’ll see you on Boxing Day! Have a fan-fucking-tabulous Christmas, everyone!

Except that Tiny Tim guy. He really pisses me off.


Comment from mojo
Time: December 22, 2011, 10:37 pm

Who’s the leader of the band
that’s starving you and me?

K-I-M, J-O-N, G-I-L, ok?

Comment from Oceania
Time: December 22, 2011, 10:39 pm

Not as pissed as you are for losing those Patriot missiles ?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 22, 2011, 10:49 pm

Yeah, that really frosts my ass, Oceania. I know I had them on me when I left the house.

I bet that smelly guy in the library pinched them.

Comment from Happy Christmas to everyone, even to Oceania who may worship a god that carries a trident
Time: December 22, 2011, 11:08 pm

You’ve encountered a House Centipede (Scutigera coleoptrata). They occur in damp, dark places like bathrooms and basements. House centipedes feed on insects and are harmless to people, animals and buildings.

Don’t be scared!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 22, 2011, 11:59 pm

Whooee. I’m trying the first bottle of elderberry wine I made from our own elderberries in September of 2010.

I made some elderberry cordial by soaking berries in vodka for six months, then adding sugar and straining it through cloth. I drank a thimblefull; it was *delicious*. And then, ten minutes later, I blew like a firehose.

So I’ve been struggling with the fear I might be allergic to elderberries.

So far, so good. This is *nice*.

Comment from Alice
Time: December 23, 2011, 12:18 am

No doubt it was the cloth.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 23, 2011, 12:20 am

Ohhhhhh. You know, that hadn’t occurred to me. (I think it was cloth. Might’ve been coffee filters).

It mystified me, because…what the hell lives in vodka? (Other than me).

Comment from Armybrat
Time: December 23, 2011, 1:04 am

Hubby and I need to strain the cherries from the vodka we’ve had soaking 6 months. We’ve used pie (tart) cherries with sugar in the past. This year we’ tried bing (sweet) cherries with sugar. I’ll let you know how it turns out.

Comment from Sven in Colorado
Time: December 23, 2011, 1:19 am

That is a pic of a woman with a possible boy-child.

Wouldn’t surprise me that the Kim Jung il was really a “Kim” (female), and not a sexually dimorphic male.

The progeny, Kim Jong un ….still a crap shoot.

This is beginning to resemble a Robert Crumb comic from the late ’60s….I am waiting for Mr. Natural to come dancin’ onto the stage, along with Alice the Goon.

Stoaty dear, as for the elderberry spew….. Ya’ might find it best to brew with yeast and take the time to make “real” wine, not some distillation which lives up to its name….it distills the essential chemical mix, good and bad.

Just a thought.

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: December 23, 2011, 3:30 am

We have some cherry “bopp” that a co-worker made and gave us last year. It is deadly. And delicious. And I can’t drink more that a small shot glass of it without getting dizzy. Here’s to dizzy!!
Merry Christmas to all!!!

Comment from Elderberry Ishmael aka Some Vegetable
Time: December 23, 2011, 3:54 am

I was curious about the And then, ten minutes later, I blew like a firehose bit, so I did a little research. Where did you get your elderberries? Did you just see them, know they were good ol’ elderberries and proceed on the superstitious learning theory that ‘ya seen one elderberry, ya seen em all’ theory? Perhaps they’re not those elderberries like you thought but the other elderberries like you didn’t think. Recall there’s a ‘right whale’ and a ‘white whale’ and one will kill you.

Anyhow, I found this:

Avoid elderberries species with red fruit growing in rounded, instead of flat clusters. They may make you sick.

And even if you got the right elderberries, there’s THIS:

Avoid unripe, green berries as they’ll get you sick. Even raw ripe elderberries make some people nauseous. Cooking or drying dispels the offending substance, and greatly improves the flavor.

Rather than take the chance that Akismet will throw this important bit of knowledge into the abyss, to leave it sulking until Boxing Day, I’m going to post the link to this bit of trivia in the next post. If you don’t see it, you’ll know that Akismet thought it was a bit of porn for his (black fishnet) Christmas Stocking and decided to keep it for himself.

Comment from Elderberry Ishmael aka Some Vegetable
Time: December 23, 2011, 3:55 am

And here it is! Or ain’t till after Boxing Day – let’s find out!


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:00 am

I wonder if I should post the rest of that Picornaviradae code?
We’ve been working really hard on it, and feel it is time to release the entire 7884 base pairs to the World!

Comment from Deborah
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:24 am

I could never make my own booze; I like pretty labels on my bottles, like Springbank, Bombay Sapphire, and Jack Daniels. I do mix a dandy martini though—4:1, thank you.

Merry Christmas to Badger House, and all the critters therein.

Comment from MCPO Airdale
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:41 am

Happy Christmas to Weasel and Badger!

Comment from Oceania
Time: December 23, 2011, 9:05 am

Yes, the festive season is getting underway here.
It is stinking bloody hot, the nights are White, the crazies are out en force … murders, muggings and mayhem!

It is starting to look like the US was 30 years ago …
I shall have to Migrate further South.


24 hour Sun Sun Sun, ideal temperatures, local wild-life is savoury however the only humans are the Yanks over the hill.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 23, 2011, 12:05 pm

I don’t think I could’ve made a mistake, Some Veg. These were from two trees that grow in our drive. Well, one in our drive, one right by the front door. I’d made elderflower cordial and champagne from them in Spring, then gathered the elderberries in Fall. So the cordial and the wine were made from the same stuff.

Not this year. Damn fool kid who used to do some gardening for us chopped the front door tree to the ground. And he didn’t even ask permission (from us or the elder mother).

Luckily, elders tolerate being cut right back and it’s already towering over the front door again. So, more next year.

And I didn’t seem to have any problems at all from the wine.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: December 23, 2011, 1:56 pm

Ya know, this is why they have liquor stores.

Comment from Anonymous
Time: December 23, 2011, 2:26 pm

Stoaty: Maybe, you just got sick. I have on alcohol before. I hadn’t drunk to excess but for no apparent reason, it didn’t agree with me. Has anyone else drank the wine? I’m not sure an allergic reaction to elderberries (if you were serious) would cause “[blowing] like a firehose.”

Comment from Redd
Time: December 23, 2011, 2:50 pm

Whoops! The above was me. 🙂

Comment from Bill (the .003% of your traffic from AfStan)T
Time: December 23, 2011, 2:59 pm

The last time I made jungle juice from canned peaches and fruit cocktail, something malevolent took up residence inside the jug and turned the stuff as black as elderberry wi–

Ummm. *Bad* simile.

No cookie.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: December 23, 2011, 3:08 pm

I agree with you on the Tiny Tim guy, Weez. He totally did not deserve Miss Vicki.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:02 pm


My wife mixes the best (for me) martini 7:0.75–that is, 7 jiggers of Blue Sapphire, 3/4 jigger of vermouth. Oh, and four olives. ‘Cause I like a snack when I drink.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:08 pm

Last time I hurled, it was from some hot dogs I ate. Yet my wife ate hotdogs from the same package and did not get sick. Weird. I’m the guy who always drinks the water, whatever country I’m in. I also buy and eat that anonymous-meat-on-a-stick sold by street-venders everywhere. I’m pretty sure eating stuff is my super-power.

Comment from Allen
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:17 pm

It looks like they just got back from Tokyo Disneyrand. That’s one strange experience. I dated this woman in Tokyo who loved the place, she took me there twice. Yes, I also realize how strange that sounds, but this was the 80’s. She made a whole pile of money over there in the modeling business. You had to be there.

Anywho, until you’ve heard Mickey speaking Japanese you haven’t quite had the whole culture shock thing.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: December 23, 2011, 4:41 pm

Allen, you think the Japanese would let the head NORK into their country to take his tot to DL?

Comment from Deborah
Time: December 23, 2011, 5:02 pm

@jwpaine: Agreed on the olive snack. When I mix my own drink, I usually put in the three: One for starters, second olive mid-way through the drink, and the last one chased by the last swallow of martini.

The beauty of the 4:1 martini is that I can hold up 4 fingers on one hand and 1 finger on the other hand, and wave to the bartender and he knows what I mean. It’s gonna be hard to wave 3/4 of an ounce 🙂

Comment from Redd
Time: December 23, 2011, 5:15 pm

Didn’t Kim3’s older brother get busted for trying to sneak over to the Disneyland in Hong Kong? My lord! Could you imagine if they built a “happiest place on earth” in NorKo?


Comment from jwpaine
Time: December 23, 2011, 5:46 pm

I think the Happiest Place On Earth in Norko would be a place with a functional and well-stocked refrigerator. Or indoor plumbing.

Deborah: Yeah, unless you’re a high school shop teacher, that 3/4 finger’d be a bitch to do in BarSlan (bartender sign language).

Comment from Oceania
Time: December 23, 2011, 11:09 pm

You have to remove or [snip – ed.] President Obama urgently to avoid a nuclear war. Remove him under section 4 of the 25th Amendment of your Constitution and get him out of office ASAP. Dead or alive.

Your survival depends on this.

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: December 24, 2011, 12:27 am

MERRY CHRISTMAS to all Weaselfans, everywhere!

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: December 24, 2011, 1:54 am

Kim Jong Il was in terrible shape physically and about 5 feet tall. And he was the best-fed man in North Korea. What does that say about what a hell hole it must be for everyone else?

Comment from Oceania
Time: December 25, 2011, 6:23 am

Took you a while to snip that one 🙂

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