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Doom. DOOOOOOOMMMMM…!

Holy shit, have you dipped a toe in the papers since Christmas? I haven’t seen such a doomfest since my Great Aunt Ruth was alive (to the extent she was ever alive).

You know, Uncle B has this theory that everyone is holding it together by brute force until Christmas is over, at which point the whole global financial doo-dah will shriek, burst its corset and spontaneously combust. I’m putting that out there in case he’s right, so he gets the bragging rights (and if he’s wrong, we can all rag on him together).

We’ve got cash, canned goods and armed farmers for neighbors. We’re positioned about as well as anyone can be, comes the shitstorm.

Graphic nicked from The Telegraph, on account of I am doing my best to squeeze a whole week out of the Christmas spirit — which, to me, involves equal parts gluttony and sloth (with a soupçon of dipsomania).

sock it to me

Comments


Comment from Armybrat
Time: December 27, 2011, 11:29 pm

Hubby and I are headed to Sicily and Malta on Jan 2 for a couple of weeks. Sure would be nice if y’all would wait until my vacation is over before you decide to let it all go to hell.

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 27, 2011, 11:30 pm

I’m not too concerned. I live in the Sunny Southern Hemisphere away from large populations of sub-human knuckle draggers.
Although I might pop out and purchase some more ammunition shortly.

Join your local Naval Reserve, and ask for an unissued SMLE. Cast your own projectiles, and for 303, you can replace some primers with 0.22LR rims and load cautiously with home made blackpowder, should you run low. It may puff, but it will blow the guts out of a [fairy princess – ed] at 300 meters!

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 27, 2011, 11:43 pm

Hmmmm checks the shiny 2012 diary the secretary left on my mantle piece.
End of March, a visit to Londonstan for a conference … oh no. Terrible Place. Smelly, dirty, depraved, diseased, backwards, lacking in morals and any common human decency … and those are just the immigrants. Disgusting creatures.

 


Comment from Sven in Colorado
Time: December 27, 2011, 11:50 pm

Our desktop has decided to die. I have an old Dell “Inspirion 4000” laptop…which is better than nothing at all (barely). At least I can keep up with the yammerings and natterings on the innertoobs, send and receive mail and keep an eye on stuff at work.

I’ve heard more than one of these doom and gloom prognostications. Not sure I believe that the whole infrastructure will unravel…But hey, my name ain’t Elijah or Isaiah.

We are kinda ready, and we are well armed. Water and heat are an issue this time of year. Food, well, plenty of rock and Eurasian doves…Duck and Canadian geese around. There are deer close by in riverbottoms.

Most predators are NOT this close in…at least the four legged ones.

 


Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:08 am

Obama is trying to keep the whole thing up with string and spit and old wrapping paper tubes until November of next year but I don’t think its gonna last that long. When it goes down, this one is gonna take down our civilization as we know it.

 


Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:29 am

They were advertising “Armageddon Week” on one of the cable channels recently. I happen to believe western civilization could collapse any time now, BUT, those Mayan’s were just lucky with the 2012 date.

Oh, yeah, on this same topic I guess I could mention my screen name is a character from the 1983 movie “War Games”. Stephen Falken was the odd character who lived on the island by himself and didn’t want to help prevent a nuclear war because he basically thought humans were beyond help and that nuclear war was inevitable anyway. I thought this would be a good screen name for me because sometimes I can be a bit of a pessimist.

 


Comment from Redd
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:39 am

That graphic is creepy. It looks like some guy’s shaved head with carvings in the skull.

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:53 am

If it all goes tits up – can you imagine living in a big city with no food and lots of mouths to feed?

 


Comment from MIke C.
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:54 am

Could use another thousand rounds of ammo just on general principles.

 


Comment from Mitchell TAFKAEY
Time: December 28, 2011, 1:13 am

The fall of western civilization would greatly inconvenience me. Please not to be falling down at this time. Thank you.

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 28, 2011, 1:51 am

I believe that has been the discussion, and it is a serious one. I personally blame multiculturalism. Period.

 


Comment from Mono The Elder
Time: December 28, 2011, 2:54 am

Well, I just found out that people are paying $8,000+ for shoes. Your country doomed, my countrys doomed, were all doomed. DOOOOOOMED. And its my fualt. Since I jinxed us.

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 28, 2011, 3:45 am

Not at all Mono old boy … the reason for the collapse is highly evident.
Lack of nationalist morals. Good old fashioned Ball Buggering Right from Wrong Morals. It would be like a debate between Dr Manning and Obama.
Should you tolerate a MacDaddy in your Whitehouse?

 


Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: December 28, 2011, 4:10 am

Multiculturalism is a symptom of a deeper problem of relativism and secularization. You can’t cut an entire culture free of its roots and ethical foundations then pretend everything will work out somehow.

 


Comment from Redd
Time: December 28, 2011, 7:29 am

I’m watching Kimmy2’s funeral. These people are nuts:

http://media.theage.com.au/news/world-news/live-kim-jongils-funeral-2861705.html

 


Comment from Redd
Time: December 28, 2011, 7:32 am

OMG. They have his flag draped coffin tied to the roof of what appears to be a 50 year old town car. lol!

 


Comment from JuliaM
Time: December 28, 2011, 7:58 am

“You know, Uncle B has this theory that everyone is holding it together by brute force until Christmas is over…”

Well, it’s the reason we have a sharp uptick in the death rate post-Christmas, after all…

Redd: “OMG. They have his flag draped coffin tied to the roof of what appears to be a 50 year old town car. lol!”

It’s resemblance to the ‘Ghostbusters’ car has already been noted on Twitter… 😉

 


Comment from Redd
Time: December 28, 2011, 12:21 pm

When I tuned in, the coffin car was zooming down the highway at about 50 mph. I was hoping the coffin would go flying off.

 


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: December 28, 2011, 2:55 pm

I think you all are just toooo pessimestic frankly. It’s an attitude problem on your (collective) part. In the spirit of the season I’m going to share with you some of the attitude training me bosses made me attend at great expense: there is never a crisis- there is always an opportunity. It’s never downsizing it’s rightsizing

In this case, don’t think of it as economic collapse and starvation – think of it as a chance to learn French cuisine.

After all they’ve been eating snails, moldy cheese, and froglegs for centuries and liking it . You will too. There! Feel better?

 


Comment from Mono The Elder
Time: December 28, 2011, 3:27 pm

PFfft. those things wil be the first to go! we’ll have to subsist on grass roots and irradiated water with stuff floating in it. At least, So I’ve heard.

 


Comment from sandman says : nothing to see here
Time: December 28, 2011, 3:38 pm

Personally, I have been investing in lead futures, ahem, for a while now. Just finished a lovely Simonov Karabine in the economical x 39mm and will be finishing my mattel rifle in late January. I did ten years in military, slept in the snow in the Arctic and the Texas and NM deserts. I can get by on about nothing if I have a firestick near to hand. I have purposefully lived a spartan lifestyle for years. Downsizing, rightsizing, whatever…It comes, it comes. Just the way it is…Like home cooked and grilled stuff I shoot anyway.
Knuckledragger here. Starting Systema traning January 8, so there’s that for the new year. Guess none of it bothers me anymore. Good Book says it has to happen anyway.
Might as well get on with it, so we can rebuild the whole fake facade again. Germany and Japan survived being flattened, so will we.
*sharpens ever present Kershaw lockblade*
*spit*

 


Comment from mojo
Time: December 28, 2011, 3:51 pm

Stick him in a clay pot and bury him. In a year, he’ll be Kim Chee.

 


Comment from A Fairy Princess
Time: December 28, 2011, 5:05 pm

I want you to know I’m hurt. Very.

Oh, and shoes for $8,000?! Does that mean the sales have started already?!

Must dash!

 


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: December 28, 2011, 5:17 pm

I suppose I should listen to my nagging husband and learn Morse and Semaphore code after all, if The Doom is really coming. We’ll be logging onto the interwebs via hand-crank and bitching about the apocalypse via telegraph.

Stoaty will have to do all her photoshop magic using a cropduster and smoke.

Oceania will have to stand on a soapbox, in front of his mirror in order to have an audience.

My cats and dogs already live together, and have for years, so I have long accepted the downfall of civilization.

ditty-dit-dah dah-dit dah dah dah-ditty dit-dah

 


Comment from mojo
Time: December 28, 2011, 5:26 pm

Are you in an area amenable to choke points on the roads, so you can screen visitors?

 


Comment from sandman says : nothing to see here
Time: December 28, 2011, 5:41 pm

On a mountainside, one way in, one way out. Familiar with most of my neighbors, including the hippie anti-gun types. They can fend for themselves if things get rough for a while.

Oh, well. Life, such as it is, goes on.

*yawn*

 


Comment from beasn
Time: December 28, 2011, 6:25 pm

A known chimp has died and I don’t mean Chuck U. Schumer or Oceania.

http://tinyurl.com/chatppz

 


Comment from sandman says : nothing to see here
Time: December 28, 2011, 6:34 pm

The Tarzan film chimp? Cheetah, 80. And Booie the smoking ape, who quit the cigs, at a Cali animal rescue foundation at 45, or thereabouts.Both will be missed more than Kim Dung Il.

And Ghostbusters want their pimped out hearse back. Kim is getting it all nasty with dead dick-tater and whatnot…

 


Comment from BigBluBug needs a hug
Time: December 28, 2011, 7:48 pm

Perhaps a ray of sunshine in a year that promises doom:

http://legalinsurrection.com/2011/12/meet-the-guy-who-can-take-down-sheldon-whitehouse/

 


Comment from MIke C.
Time: December 28, 2011, 9:25 pm

Nobody had Cheetah in the Dead Pool?

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: December 28, 2011, 10:03 pm

…In a year, he’ll be Kim Chee.

Mojo!

My wine-cooler went all the way up into my sinuses and now its all fizzy in there!! Thought I was gonna die! No fair! I wasn’t ready!

 


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: December 29, 2011, 12:42 am

Did anybody have McGoo in the dead pool?

THINKS:
1. Pick McGoo in next Dead Pool
2. Post “Jesus is watching” Parrot joke
3. PROFIT!!!

 


Comment from EZnSF
Time: December 29, 2011, 3:14 am

Sloth, Armageddon, Turkey/Ham satiation, no internet news since the 15th. Bring it on, I’m ready to not give a fuck anymore. Uncle B is mostly correct.

Happy Longer Days. Only six weeks till we unhibernate.

And to Oceania: If the SHTF, your pissant little island, whose modern economy exists only on the back of far greater economies, will go the way of a Bangladeshi bungalow in an Al Gore novel.

 


Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: December 29, 2011, 3:57 am

Britain’s borders close if euro goes

BRITAIN’S borders will be closed to continental Europeans if the euro collapses, it was revealed yesterday.

The emergency measure would block hordes of French, German and Dutch nationals who would be desperate to withdraw cash here with credit cards if banks in their own countries dry up.

It is feared a run on British banks could also result in them being unable to service UK businesses.

 


Comment from Bill (the .003% of your traffic from AfStan)T
Time: December 29, 2011, 6:54 am

Germany and Japan survived being flattened, so will we.

‘Cuz we had the spare cash (and the booming economy) to keep them alive for a decade or so…

*sharpens ever present Kershaw lockblade*

Gerbers. Plural.

Never-you-mind “how many?”…

 


Comment from Oceania
Time: December 29, 2011, 12:24 pm

I’m looking at one of these: http://members.storm.ca/~aiarms/M10-intro.shtm

 


Comment from Bill (the .003% of your traffic from AfStan)T
Time: December 30, 2011, 7:03 pm

The SMLE isn’t a “Short Magazine Lee Enfield” (no such critter as a *Long* Magazine Lee-Enfield), it’s a “Rifle, Short (in overall length), Magazine (previous L-Es had an internal clip), Lee-Enfield.”

Beware of weapons manufacturers who don’t get the nomenclature correct. Or, rather, who hire advert writers who wax poetic but don’t get the nomenclature correct.

Gratuitous tip: if you buy one, don’t try to sharpen it…

 


Comment from David Kilpatrick
Time: December 31, 2011, 3:26 pm

You didn’t nick the graphic from the Telegraph, you nicked my photograph licensed by the Telegraph (but not properly credited) and you altered it without asking. Not that I really mind or intend to pursue you for payment or a take-down notice. Since the Telegraph pays about twelve quid for an online use the value of any photograph today is debatable and I have little respect for my fellow professionals, especially in the USA, who see infringements like this as a chance earn a few tens of thousands from a court judgment. Had your blog not been worth reading, and if I didn’t keep hens, my reaction could be have different.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 31, 2011, 3:39 pm

Good choice. I doubt you could’ve squeezed more than four wet bantams and a banjo out of me on M’Lud’s crankiest day.

Everyone, wander over to Mister Kilpatrick’s links and see if you find anything interesting. Always happy to recommend the work of a man who declines to kick my ass.

 


Comment from Redd
Time: January 1, 2012, 4:40 pm

This brotherhood of chickens is amazing. :)

 

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