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All the Really Dangerous Fallacies I Learned in Kindergarten

instrument cluster

Have you ever wondered why your speedometer goes to 160, when you’re pretty sure your old hoopty couldn’t do more than 75, 80 tops? It’s because gauges are designed so that “normal” is somewhere toward the middle of the dial.

That porridge-nicking hussy Goldilocks probably started this, and the idea reinforces itself every time we burn our mouths: best is something in between. Not too hot, not too cold. Fair. Moderate. Reasonable. Normal.

This idea goes right down to the bedrock. It’s in our bones. We buy it instinctively. We want to be that thing. That normal, reasonable, moderate person.

Problem is, the best answer is usually not the one poised halfway between two extremes. Even simple concepts that lie along simple scales are more useful at the extremes. Hot is for pizza. Cold is for beer. Room temperature is for…bananas, I guess.

For more complex concepts, there often isn’t a middle ground, because the competing ideas are too different. There are too many parts, and the parts don’t lie along the same scale.

The pernicious belief in moderation even in the face of unreconcilable ideas is how we get extraordinarily bad Third Ways. Tony Blair. Bill Clinton. Edutainment. Christian rock. Culottes. Zombies. Intelligent design. Unitarians. Palestine.

Okay, there’s the spork. I’ll give you the spork.

Comments


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:22 am

I’d read many years ago that they scale or align aircraft instrument panel dials so that the majority of “normal” readings are either horizontal or vertical. This allows the pilot to quickly eye-scan the whole panel for trouble without actually “reading” each gauge.

This (scanning without reading) is why digital-number displays are generally not used for critical instruments in planes or cars: you have to actually “read” the number on a digital readout. A gauge needle that’s out of place is instantly noticeable.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:25 am

It’s much easier to calculate times with an analog watch, too. For half an hour, just mentally flip the minute hand across the dial. With a digital clock, you have to do math.

Brrrr.

Math.


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:31 am

*whimper* But I like Christian rock. (Now Christian rap and Christian heavy metal – those are other issues all together.)

Interesting. I did not know about the further end of the speedometer.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:34 am

Yep. Good point. The pattern-detecting and symmetry/flipping/mirroring ability in the brain is – I believe – way older and more hard-wired than higher math abilities.

I haven’t investigated, but I’d bet that analog-hand watches (even if digitally generated) sell better than digital watches.

Trivia question: (I am 99% sure you’ll know this) In a watch advertisement, what time is the watch almost always set to? Two possible answers.


Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:35 am

I dunno. All the cars I’ve owned or stolen have gone up to about 75% of the gauge. I got one of the little high-revving hatchbacks that I owned up to around 110/130 mi h^-1 on the way to the Lake District one time going down a hill with the wind behind me. That’s 84.6% of the gauge.
Oh, and I like cold pizza. Puts hairs on your chest.
Ooh, what does the D/R gauge do?
How’s Badger House? Still standing, I presume. Yeah, they built them to last back in those days.
We didn’t really get anything more than a strong gust up here. Maybe it’s in the post, so to speak.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:38 am

Discharge – Recharge? Generator/alternator status?


Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:42 am

Oh, I see. So if it swings leftwise, you’ve got discharge problems. Man, it never ends does it?


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:42 am

I liked your exponential notation, Gibby! I assume that when you were going 110-130, you were fleeing the cops or Interpol?


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:45 am

I’m convinced that many of Weasel’s lurkers are Nobel Laureates – secretly keeping their noggins freshly stuffed with important knowledge. It’s the only explanation.


Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:46 am

No, just trying to get there faster.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:46 am

Huh. Well. I did not know, McGoo…but so far, all the ones I’ve seen online look to be set at 10:08. Why is that?

And the D/R gauge is “Democrat/Republican.”


Comment from Anonymous
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:48 am

10:10 or 1:50?


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:50 am

Yep. They’ll almost always be set to 10:08 or the mirror about the vertical axis – about 8 minutes til 2.

The reason is that when casually looked at, the watch has a SMILE on its face rather than a frown, or whatever. It’s an ad-psychology-thing, so I’ve been told.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:51 am

The Anonymous has it!


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 11:56 am

Well, I’ll be damned. I did not know that.


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: March 10, 2008, 12:05 pm

Thanks, McGoo. I feel smarter knowing that. Good “show-off” trivia,


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 12:20 pm

Exactly, Musli. It’s great to know on a Sunday when the newspaper advertisements come out. You can bet someone that you know what time the jewelry-store ads will have on the watches. Matter of fact – I did this to my host last trip to Austin.

Now I can go nap.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 12:43 pm

Bill Kristol is on crack:

If any Republican can defend conservative principles and policies, at once acknowledging Bush’s failures while pivoting to present his own biography and agenda to the voters, McCain can.

…and…

Perhaps the most obvious way McCain could upend the normal dynamics of this year’s election would be a bold vice presidential choice. He could pick a hawkish and principled Democrat like Joe Lieberman.


Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: March 10, 2008, 1:42 pm

What? Nonsense. Billy Crystal is a fine comedic actor. Have you not seen City Slickers? And to a lesser extent – City Slickers II: the Legend of Curly’s Gold?


Comment from Princess Bernie
Time: March 10, 2008, 2:52 pm

Wow. I am Anonymous. Got a new PC at work and didn’t even look to see if my name was filled in when I posted that.

And then, I actually thought I’d posted a response about an hour ago and it’s not even there!

Damn Twilight Zone.


Comment from porknbean
Time: March 10, 2008, 3:57 pm

So if it swings leftwise, you’ve got discharge problems.

You bet. Along with itching and burning……
Bath house morality will do that to them.

BWAHAHAHAHA…and prostituting….Spitzer, you hypocritical lefty shitbag!


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:11 pm

Oooh! That was good, PnB!

I still wanna know what act his whore considered “unsafe”.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:12 pm

I’m just reading up on Spitzer now. These people are priceless, aren’t they? Pure ethics-free sociopaths.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:31 pm

Good grief! When The Weasel mentioned ‘a corrupt NY attorney’ she hadn’t used his name. Now I see who it is, I’m even more impressed – his infamy as a shakedown artist in the true tradition of the great Alphonse Capone and Bugsy Siegel hadn’t been lost on us.

What a piece of walking corruption.


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:33 pm

I still wanna know what act his whore considered “unsafe”.

These day? Probably lighting up a cigarette afterwards – that second hand smoke causes lung-cancer dontchaknow.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:43 pm

I wanna know what sort of services cost $30,000 a weekend. My imagination isn’t that good.


Comment from Muslihoon
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:49 pm

I can’t imagine what could cost 3,000/weekend. Difference with me is that I suppose I won’t want to know.

I have very little respect for such scumbags. D or R, they should be out. They’re elected to represent and administrate on behalf of the people, not to lord their privates around. (From what I’ve noticed, Republicans are very harsh on such corrupt pols whether the politician is R or D. Equal opportunty prudes we are.)


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: March 10, 2008, 4:52 pm

If you ask me, $30,000 wouldn’t even cover having to spend half an hour alone in a room with a piece of hypocritical filth like Spitzer.


Comment from Dave in Texas
Time: March 10, 2008, 5:52 pm

My watch is frowning at me right now.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 10, 2008, 5:57 pm

Dave, we warned you about the brown acid.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 7:01 pm

So has the shit-for-brains resigned yet?


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: March 10, 2008, 7:23 pm

You know how it is these days, McGoo – they are all students of the First World War admiral, Jackie Fisher, whose motto was ‘Never explain, never apologise’.

I can’t recall the last time a British politician resigned.


Comment from Cuffy Meigs
Time: March 10, 2008, 7:40 pm

Room temperature is for…bananas, I guess.

Actually, I looooove cold bananas!

Problem is, put ’em in the fridge and they turn black. The only place you can get a cold banana is on an airliner. And you have to take off your shoes and perform other tricks to get that cold banana.

Evolution, my ass.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 8:19 pm

Holy sheep shit, Badger! That was a storm!


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 8:20 pm

Dammit. How ’bout this?

-=snip=-


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 8:21 pm

I give up. Weaz – would you delete those?


Comment from porknbean
Time: March 10, 2008, 8:58 pm

Shit brains has not resigned yet. I am hearing rustlings of other dem pols saying he doesn’t need to resign over something ‘private’ that is between him and his wife.

Maybe the next prostitute ring he gets to romp with will be Chinese or Russian. I hear those kind like to talk politics while they service you. What’s a little sharing between business partners, eh?


Comment from porknbean
Time: March 10, 2008, 8:59 pm

…especially when their pimps have them wired or something.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: March 10, 2008, 9:28 pm

Shame about the links, McGoo. I watched the TV news tonight and it was (as these things always are) hideously sad for the poor bastiches who’ve been flooded out.

But, in the great scheme of things? I’ve farted worse. This was not a very big deal at all.

Funnily enough, the Ancient and Mad Maternal Badger opined that she reckons the news has got hysterical these days and that she’s sick of them hyping what people used to shrug about and say: ‘It’s winter. What do you expect?’.

As usual, the old mustelid is right.

We’re pussies. When she was a wee badger the skies rained bombs and rockets. WTF are we fussed about?


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 10, 2008, 9:39 pm

The link was just a photo of a huge wave by a lighthouse. But it was dramatic. Probably on the southwestern(?) region of your realm.

Yeah – a mini-hurricane does not compare to WWII.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 11, 2008, 5:25 am

I saw that photo, McGoo. I almost linked to another from the Mail, but I suspect the reason your link didn’t work is they fiddle with the filenames. So I din’t.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 11, 2008, 8:18 am

Interesting. It seemed to work from “here” but wouldn’t after being posted “there” so something was fiddled.

Good morning.


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: March 11, 2008, 9:21 am

So … the whore-banger hasn’t resigned yet? He’s actually going to try to – ahem – ride it out, I guess.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 11, 2008, 9:46 am

We shall see. If he doesn’t resign, he’s a busted flush. He was the great crusading reformer; how’s he going to put on a display of righteous wrath now?

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