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Fifty-three percent less shiny than advertised

who is obama, really?
For a while there, I was kind of leaning Obama. Oh, I wouldn’t have voted for him, but I might not have voted against him, either. My reasoning was: they love their guy, I hate our guy, we can’t win them all and they can’t all be the most important election in history…so why not Obama?

I didn’t think it would be much of a contest, anyway. Put Mister Tall, Dark and Elegant on a stage next to that crusty little booger McCain, and I was pretty sure that would be the end of that.

But then Obama began making the nuttiest mistakes. A European tour? What the hell?

Joe Biden?!? Seriously — Joe Biden?!? Joe Biden is a creature composed entirely of mouth and stupid. Barney Frank would be a better choice — at least if you could make him put his teeth in.

And then that Greek temple thing. Jesus! Arrogant isn’t the word. Cartoony is the word. That’s exactly the sort of place I would have loved to see the President of the United States give a speech…when I was eight. Saturday morning, somewhere between the Herculoids and the Banana Splits.

But the worst was still to come: turns out, dude can’t take a jibe. His skeen is too theen. I don’t know how much of that extra sensitivity is the candidate and how much is his entourage, but we can’t have it. We can’t have a president we’re not allowed to make fun of.

It’s positively unAmerican.

sock it to me

October 7, 2008 — 10:48 am
Comments: 83