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Another internet myth, exploded

Oh, man…I don’t believe I forgot to tell you this story. It was damp on Christmas Eve, so I let the chickens into the kitchen while I made rolls. I threw a towel over an old chair, and they sat on it, burbling happily, while I kneaded dough.

And then one of them farted.

It wasn’t a prolonged, nuanced affair, but it was a definite blaart. And no, it wasn’t a poop that coincidentally made a noise. This is significant, because the topic has come up on this blog before. You’ll get over a million and a half returns on the Google query “do chickens fart?”

(My favorite is from Google Answers. The question was “Do chickens Fart? if so can you light the fart on fire?” And the answer voted #1 is “your father doesn’t beat you enough.”)

Anyhoo, the definitive answer is NO, chickens do not fart. The site Farting Chickens put the question to 22 professors and got a bunch of blah-blah-blah about incompletely digested carbohydrates and short colons and…well. No, they cried. Chickens do not fart!

Well, Poindexters, there were only the five of us in that room, and SOMEbody cut the cheese. Let rip. Played the butt trumpet. Fired a retro rocket. Popped a fluffy. Stepped on a duck. Baked an ass biscuit. Fill in your favorite euphemism.

I didn’t see who, but my money is on Mapp. She’s the Eric Cartman of chickens.

sock it to me

December 29, 2011 — 10:33 pm
Comments: 62