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Round 59: Spring is just around the corner


It is my pleasure to announce the demise of Commie douchecanoe Pete Seeger, and not before time. Thank god we had a Harvard-educated Manhattanite to teach us the real purpose of banjer music, or it would still be all moonshine, pretty girls and fattening hogs for Winter. Congratulations to bigsmarthuman, who wins dick while Seeger bum-ditties in hell.

Not a fan, in case I’m being too subtle for you inbred hillbillies.

Right! Here we go! Wait, first an administrative note (I’ll incorporate it into the rules later): make sure you have a correct spelling of your choice somewhere in your comment. These threads get longish and I use search to figure out if we have a winner.

Like my sainted mother used to say, bad spelling thwarts dick winners.

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing on paper suffused with elephant shit particles. Because I didn’t have any dinosaur shit particles.

sock it to me

January 31, 2014 — 6:00 pm
Comments: 90