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I suppose I oughta

If you haven’t seen this picture today, welcome. Is this your first visit to the internet?

This shot was taken in a park in East London and, of course, contrary to appearances, this isn’t a happy Disney funride species mashup. It’s a stoat trying to kill a woodpecker for its supper. They both survived. Poor, poor hungry stoaty. I looked for a link to the original, straight news article but it was too late…

…the internet had exploded into tweets and memes.

(Thanks to everyone who sent me links. It gives me a warm, happy glow that a sizable chunk of the internet hears ‘weasel’ and immediately thinks of me).

True story. I read in one of my many volumes of weasel lore that a gamekeeper(?) once found a recently dead eagle that had an ancient, mummified weasel hanging off its chest. He figured the eagle had stooped to the weasel and broken its back, after which the weasel was able to extricate itself, pull its broken body up the body of the flying eagle, sink its fangs over the heart of the bird, die and go into spasm, there to stay forever.

The eagle lived out its life with a dessicated stoat hanging off of him. Let that be a lesson. I’m not sure what lesson that should be, but please let it be one.

March 3, 2015 — 9:26 pm
Comments: 22

It’s Spam appreciation week!

Spam Appreciation Week, I say! I’m sure Hormel sponsors this with the purest of motives.

If nothing else, you must listen to the Spam jingle from 1963. Scrub to 2:37 to hear the theme, words and all. Dude with a cut-glass accent teases it 4EVA.

My mama told me Spam was just made from the bits they had to trim off to fit Danish ham in those cans. It’s not true, but it’s nothing nasty. It’s just pork that’s been cooked in the can, like soup and dogfood. They’re cooked in the can, I mean. Not pork. We don’t feed cats and dogs pork and we don’t make pork soup, though I’m damned if I know why.

Anyhoo! Sliced thin, fried until crispy, covered in melted cheese on a toasted bagel half with mayo. How do you take your spam?

WARNING – WARNING – WARNING…geez, that Spam song is an earworm. Uncle B and I are rolling around on the floor clutching our heads like something out of a Star Trek episode and it Will Not Go Away.

March 2, 2015 — 8:36 pm
Comments: 34