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This is the hot, wet pussy you’ve heard so much about on in the internet. Austrian dude drove twenty minutes to the car wash, noticed the car made an odd shrieking sound going through the water jets, discovered it continued to scream even with the engine switched off, found his cat wedged into the grill. Then he slowly drove himself to the automobile club to have the cat extracted.

Murli is fine. And she smells Springtime fresh!

Stupid cat stories: when you absolutely, positively have something else you have to do tonight.


Comment from Armybrat
Time: April 10, 2013, 10:16 pm

My cat became mine when she hung upside down from a tree branch whilst we were soaking in the hot tub and she laid open the nose of the Rottweiller who dared challenge her. The rotties cringed in fear as she became the lady of the house. The dogs are all long gone and that damn cat is still the “lady” of the house! She’s 15 years old and so arthritic she can hardly move…but I am her human and I so I continue to serve her.

Comment from thefritz
Time: April 10, 2013, 10:31 pm

I’m still trying to uncurl my toes after reading that first sentence….

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 10, 2013, 10:34 pm

I’m sorry. I hovered over the keyboard for a while, wondering if I dared.

I’ve grown a little too used to this joke because we have a cat that goes out in all weathers and comes in looking like Murli from the carwash.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: April 10, 2013, 10:56 pm

My neighbor had a kitty who used to enjoy a nap on the fanbelt of her jeep. It ended pretty much as you might expect.

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: April 10, 2013, 11:21 pm

Awww…poor kitteh!

Comment from Tim
Time: April 10, 2013, 11:50 pm

My mom cooked a woodchuck the same way.

Comment from Statler & Waldorf LLP
Time: April 11, 2013, 12:11 am

Muerli? Muerli Muerli?
Is that what you fashionable youngsters call it these days?

Comment from twolaneflash
Time: April 11, 2013, 12:16 am

Cats. Damned minions of Satan from the ninth circle of Hell. The University of Georgia released the results last year of a survey of domestic cat activities and pretty much reproduced results from a similar study in England: cats are indiscriminate hunter-killers that decimate an environment, killing everything that moves, seldom for food. Snakes, lizards, mice, squirrels, chipmunks, and birds don’t stand a chance against the prowling cat. I catch one in my cage-trap every now and then, always with no collar. Taste like chicken, but stringy.

There is an island of land near Disney World that became a repository for stray cats. Unrestrained breeding and a depleted food source soon created a PETA cat-crisis in Orlando, FL. Do-gooders wanted to capture them, have them neutered, and return them to the island to live out their “natural” life span. Compassion kills when it’s wielded by stupid.

Comment from orabidoo
Time: April 11, 2013, 12:26 am

A feral cat = sexy arrow dance.
I cannot keep up with the beasts.

Comment from Redd
Time: April 11, 2013, 1:02 am

Then he put the poor thing in a box and put him in the trunk. Poor cat can’t catch a break.

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: April 11, 2013, 1:33 am

Poor kitty 🙁

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 11, 2013, 1:52 am

Well, I’ve sent enough cute, funny AND disturbing cat pics to Stoatie to last a lifetime…. -_-

Comment from Mono The Elderish
Time: April 11, 2013, 1:52 am

Ah, Reminds me of the time we were renovating and suddenly had cats in the walls. Ah, the time we had extracting cats from walls. And the glares I got from the furry rats. Oof.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: April 11, 2013, 3:13 am

Yeah. Mommy cats leaving their kittens in the nice, warm safty of your accessory belts over night is not a happy morning sight.

Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: April 11, 2013, 7:03 am

Nothing worse than a stinky pussy.

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: April 11, 2013, 8:52 am

Our cat disappeared one day and we couldn’t find her. Called and called, even made the dinnertime call, and nothing. Next morning, my Father went out to go to work, started the station wagon and *MEOOOOOWWWW*. The cat had crawled into the engine compartment to stay warm over night. A little too close to the fan belts, however.

Poor kitty. Rest in pieces.

Comment from Wolfus Aurelius
Time: April 11, 2013, 2:10 pm

Stories like these and the fanbelt horrors are why I keep my cats indoors.

For their part, they have very little interest in roaming. Chekov the Siberian has spent his whole life indoors, and hates change anyway. Wolf the black cat got left behind by his feckless humans when they were evicted, and was making a kind of living going from door to door for handouts when I took him in. He’s gotten out onto my front lawn twice, by accident, and came back when I called him. Clearly he likes his comfortable life with me as his manservant.

Comment from Deborah
Time: April 11, 2013, 2:11 pm

To make you laugh, Stoaty!
I’m off to shop for a Robert Woods print 🙂

Comment from CoyoteKhan
Time: April 11, 2013, 3:40 pm

See, this is why I don’t want a cat…cats act superior and you feel like a servant. Dogs are servile and needy. So I’ve concluded if I ever got an animal, it’d have to be a bird of some sort. Maybe even get into falconry.

Comment from Sporadic Small Arms Fire
Time: April 11, 2013, 6:36 pm

A dog that is never servile: shiba inu.
Very clean. Very strong sense of territory. Misses nothing.
If it has any weak points, it’s that the golden eagles (common around here) would make a snack of it.

Get a goldfish, or even a tapeworm. You two would be practically inseparable.

Comment from mojo
Time: April 11, 2013, 7:28 pm

Murli won’t sleep there again!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 11, 2013, 8:00 pm

That was great, Deborah.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: April 11, 2013, 8:17 pm

Temperate zone snakes make excellent pets: if you get tired of them filthying up your house or meowing all the time, just chuck ’em in the fridge & put ’em into hibernation for a few months.

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: April 15, 2013, 9:06 pm

Homer kitty decided to sleep in the fan cowling….fortunately for him it was a V6 with a cowling for a V8. He got knocked unconscious but not knocked OUT of the cowling. I had to call the vet and see if she could come over, as I obviously couldn’t start the truck….
I managed to ouzle him out his resting place and when he hit the ground, he woke up and took off. My vet says if you can’t catch the patient, he is probably going to survive.
He did, but never slept there again!!

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