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Purty flars

ZOMG! It’s Delphinium Week at Godinton House!

I know, right? It seems like only yesterday. The picture, of course, is not Godinton House. It is but the head gardener’s place at Godinton House, but I fell in love with it because it had those awesome pointy boo-boos on either side. I didn’t do so great in my architecture course

Godinton House is a grand old pile. Per the masonry dates on the house, building was continuous from the 15th to the 20th Centuries, though it all aged down and works well together. In six hundred years, it has only been in the hands of two families. We didn’t go in, on account of we were there for the delphiniums.

The delphiniums! If you wouldn’t know a delphinium if the Delphinium Fairy rammed a flaming delphinium up your ass, here is a nice picture Uncle B took today. But there were acres of them in the most spectacular colors. The weather was perfect for it today, too.

The delphinium part of the garden is maintained by the Kent and East Sussex chapter of the Delphinium Society. All kidding aside, they seemed a nice bunch of old dears, and the gardens were spectacularly pretty.

p.s. I’m still playing that online card game, Hearthstone. I went to post something on their user forums tonight and got the message that my account has been suspended. No explanation or nothing.

Me. My account. Don’t they know I’m a respectable goddamned middle aged church lady? I just got back from a fucking delphinium show, for chrissakes!

Comments


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: June 25, 2014, 10:49 pm

This rock ‘n roll lifestyle will be the end of us…


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: June 25, 2014, 10:51 pm

Obviously they had your number from the start and nipped it in the bud, as it were.
Delphinium shows are just a gateway drug to Lupin-theft. Next it’ll be black-market tulip bulbs.


Comment from Ben
Time: June 25, 2014, 11:13 pm

Eli Wallach has died. Hutch takes the dick.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 25, 2014, 11:26 pm

Gosh, I didn’t check. Congrats, Hutch! I’ll acknowledge tomorrow.


Comment from Deborah
Time: June 26, 2014, 12:56 am

I love Delphiniums, but alas, they are poisonous. I’ve been planning/platting a moon garden for years, but I won’t plant anything that’s poisonous to people or pets. My plant list is getting mighty thin …


Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: June 26, 2014, 1:09 am

I’m a fan of the deybloos. How can you identify ’em? Well, dey bloo, just look at ’em.


Comment from mojo
Time: June 26, 2014, 1:48 am

Ah, lawns no doubt maintained by that old landed gentry method of “Seed and roll for 500 years”…


Comment from iamfelix
Time: June 26, 2014, 2:27 am

The Dormouse and The Doctor

There once was a Dormouse who lived in a bed Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red), And all the day long he’d a wonderful view Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red), And all the day long he’d a wonderful view Of geraniums (red) and delphiniums (blue).

A Doctor came hurrying round, and he said: “Tut-tut, I am sorry to find you in bed. Just say ‘Ninety-nine’ while I look at your chest…. Don’t you find that chrysanthemums answer the best?”

The Dormouse looked round at the view and replied (When he’d said “Ninety-nine”) that he’d tried and he’d tried, And much the most answering things that he knew Were geraniums (red) and delphiniums (blue).

The Doctor stood frowning and shaking his head, And he took up his shiny silk hat as he said: “What the patient requires is a change,” and he went To see some chrysanthemum people in Kent.

The Dormouse lay there, and he gazed at the view Of geraniums (red) and delphiniums (blue), And he knew there was nothing he wanted instead Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red).

The Doctor came back and, to show what he meant, He had brought some chrysanthemum cuttings from Kent. “Now these,” he remarked, “give a much better view Than geraniums (red) and delphiniums (blue).”

They took out their spades and they dug up the bed Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red), And they planted chrysanthemums (yellow and white). “And now,” said the Doctor, “we’ll soon have you right.”

The Dormouse looked out, and he said with a sigh: “I suppose all these people know better than I. It was silly, perhaps, but I did like the view Of geraniums (red) and delphiniums (blue).”

The Doctor came round and examined his chest, And ordered him Nourishment, Tonics, and Rest. “How very effective,” he said, as he shook The thermometer, “all these chrysanthemums look!”

The Dormouse turned over to shut out the sight Of the endless chrysanthemums (yellow and white). “How lovely,” he thought, “to be back in a bed Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red.)”

The Doctor said, “Tut! It’s another attack!” And ordered him Milk and Massage-of-the-back, And Freedom-from-worry and Drives-in-a-car, And murmured, “How sweet your chrysanthemums are!”

The Dormouse lay there with his paws to his eyes, And imagined himself such a pleasant surprise: “I’ll pretend the chrysanthemums turn to a bed Of delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red)!”

The Doctor next morning was rubbing his hands, And saying, “There’s nobody quite understands These cases as I do! The cure has begun! How fresh the chrysanthemums look in the sun!”

The Dormouse lay happy, his eyes were so tight He could see no chrysanthemums, yellow or white. And all that he felt at the back of his head Were delphiniums (blue) and geraniums (red).

And that is the reason (Aunt Emily said) If a Dormouse gets in a chrysanthemum bed, You will find (so Aunt Emily says) that he lies Fast asleep on his front with his paws to his eyes.


Comment from iamfelix
Time: June 26, 2014, 2:28 am

— A. A. Milne


Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: June 26, 2014, 3:41 am

The Doctor next morning was rubbing his hands, And saying, “There’s nobody quite understands These cases as I do! The cure has begun! How fresh the chrysanthemums look in the sun!”

Not to take glory away from our gentle hostess, but this is brilliant.


Comment from Hutch
Time: June 26, 2014, 5:09 am

Thanks Stoaty. I knew the old guy would come through for me eventually.


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: June 26, 2014, 9:26 am

Thank you, Felix 🙂


Comment from Deborah
Time: June 26, 2014, 12:18 pm

I followed the link to Godinton House and it is a beautiful place. I don’t know whether to envy the gardeners or feel sorry for them. I looked it up on Google maps, and was intrigued by the great swathe of green between Ashford and Canterbury. Not many villages it seems. Is there something special about that area of land?


Comment from mojo
Time: June 26, 2014, 3:20 pm

(A Parable) 😉


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: June 26, 2014, 4:25 pm

Stoaty,

Got an arty question for you, pertinent to the portraits of the Tokes done in the 1600s, and something that I’ve wondered about for years. Is there any particular reason that people were represented with such bulgy protruding eyes? It seems to be a standard for that era. Was it considered attractive or did everyone have Grave’s disease?


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: June 26, 2014, 8:11 pm

Hi Deborah – I don’t think so, other than that it is mostly farming land.

Ashford, I might add, is one of the most hideous and vile places in the county (and Kent has some pretty rough patches as you get closer to London!).

It evolved into a fairly reasonable market town, as far as one can make out from old photographs. Then they built a railway works there – which wasn’t as bad as it may sound.

The real damage has been done in the past 20 years, during which it has been used as a dumping ground for London. Whole farms have been swallowed-up and buried beneath some of the most worthless architecture and inhuman town planning that I have ever seen and if the result of this metastasis isn’t a crime and drug problem of Biblical proportions inside ten years then I will be amazed.

The great John Betjeman caused outrage when in 1937 he lambasted another ‘new town’ Slough, in the following. If the old boy had seen Ashford, he would have been even more appalled.

I hope I don’t drop Her Stoatliness in the copyright soup by posting this. Read it quickly, in case She has to biff it.

Come friendly bombs and fall on Slough!
It isn’t fit for humans now,
There isn’t grass to graze a cow.
Swarm over, Death!

Come, bombs and blow to smithereens
Those air -conditioned, bright canteens,
Tinned fruit, tinned meat, tinned milk, tinned beans,
Tinned minds, tinned breath.

Mess up the mess they call a town-
A house for ninety-seven down
And once a week a half a crown
For twenty years.

And get that man with double chin
Who’ll always cheat and always win,
Who washes his repulsive skin
In women’s tears:

And smash his desk of polished oak
And smash his hands so used to stroke
And stop his boring dirty joke
And make him yell.

But spare the bald young clerks who add
The profits of the stinking cad;
It’s not their fault that they are mad,
They’ve tasted Hell.

It’s not their fault they do not know
The birdsong from the radio,
It’s not their fault they often go
To Maidenhead

And talk of sport and makes of cars
In various bogus-Tudor bars
And daren’t look up and see the stars
But belch instead.

In labour-saving homes, with care
Their wives frizz out peroxide hair
And dry it in synthetic air
And paint their nails.

Come, friendly bombs and fall on Slough
To get it ready for the plough.
The cabbages are coming now;
The earth exhales.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 26, 2014, 8:52 pm

It’s an interesting question, ‘Groupie. There are certain facial characteristic that typify portraits of every era. I’m thinking about the bulgy forehead in early Victorian portraits, for example.

That one is suspicious because they believed a bulgy forehead was a sign of intelligence, so maybe they just imposed that on otherwise bulge-less faces. Maybe the bulgy eyes in Tudor times was a conscious imitation of Liz the First, like those ladies who supposedly shaved their hairline back.

Or maybe some faces really do typify some eras. My mother mused about this a lot (she was a trained and very good portrait painter). You look at old photographs now, and some faces could only be in the Twenties. Or the Sixties.


Comment from Deborah
Time: June 26, 2014, 8:58 pm

Wow! Thanks Uncle Badger. Mr.Betjeman was a bit of a grouch, huh. I bet he really went ’round the bend when the Yanks showed up. Nice to see him use the word “bogus” though. It’s such a popular word now that I thought the coinage was contemporary, too.

That long green swathe of land caught my eye because it didn’t seem to be diced up with big roads.


Comment from mojo
Time: June 26, 2014, 8:59 pm

“What shall we do with our fair city?
Dirty and dangerous, grimy and gritty?
What shall we do with our fair town?
Grab a hammer and SMASH IT DOWN!”
— John Brunner (I believe)


Comment from Deborah
Time: June 26, 2014, 9:10 pm

Stoaty—I always thought Mike Ditka (former Chicago Bears coach) had a Roaring Twenties kind of face.


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: June 26, 2014, 9:47 pm

Geez Stoaty, I thought you were trolling the gaming forums for a minute…but then I saw they were serious.

http://motherboard.vice.com/read/the-quest-to-understand-feminism-through-world-of-warcraft


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 26, 2014, 10:07 pm

That’s priceless. Honestly, I don’t know how you can carry feminist baggage into video games.

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