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Happy birthday, smartass

It’s Dorothy Parker (née Rothschild)’s birthday today. I confess, I have never read a word she wrote. I know her strictly from her pithy witticisms.

She hated that.

Also, it’s super fun to say “pithy witticisms”. Please try it for yourself. Enjoy this list of Dorothy Parker quotations, ranked in order of popularity. You will definitely recognize some of them.

p.s. that’s a terrific description of writer’s block in the telegram.


Comment from CantHarkMyCry
Time: August 22, 2019, 11:44 pm

There’s little in taking or giving,
There’s little in water or wine;
This living, this living, this living
Was never a project of mine.
Oh, hard is the struggle, and sparse is
The gain of the one at the top,
For art is a form of catharsis,
And love is a permanent flop,
And work is the province of cattle,
And rest’s for a clam in a shell,
So I’m thinking of throwing the battle-
Would you kindly direct me to hell?


Comment from CantHarkMyCry
Time: August 22, 2019, 11:46 pm

And, um, you’ve actually read at least three of her poems, not including “Coda.”
As a teenager I read her poems obsessively; her prose never did much for me. . .

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: August 23, 2019, 12:31 am

I have always been in love with Dorothy Parker…,

I used to dream about getting sneaking into the Algonquin Round Table… and saying something witty enough to make Dorothy Parker smirk…..

Comment from OldFert
Time: August 23, 2019, 12:31 am

I had to look up Dorothy Parker’s picture. I kept on seeing Dorothy Kilgallen in my head.

Then I had to look up Dorothy Kilgallen’s picture since I remembered her having Betty Boop’s mouth and chin. (Turns out, not quite.)

I remember this one from school:
Razors pain you,
Rivers are damp,
Acids stain you,
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren’t lawful,
Nooses give,
Gas smells awful.
You might as well live.”

Comment from Ric
Time: August 23, 2019, 9:22 am

She was a commie.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: August 23, 2019, 2:39 pm

Among other abhorrent things.

Comment from DurnedYankee
Time: August 23, 2019, 3:24 pm

But she was obviously fairly witty.

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