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I am the Queen of Mayo

I love homemade mayo. I love commercial mayo, for that matter. If anybody tells you they put mayo on their fries here, them ’em they’re a filthy, filthy liar. Maybe on the continent, but Brits aren’t real big on mayo, I am sad to report.

Anyway, my homemade mayo was a little hit or miss. You know the drill: blend an egg yolk then slowly drizzle in the oil. Eh. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t.

Then I lit on a brilliant recipe online. I’d credit the lady, but that was ages ago and I forget where I saw it. She puts everything in at once and gives is a whizz with a stick mixer. And it works great!

You have to put stuff in in the right order, though. And quantities are important (this last was harder for me to work out because I’m using a non-standard bantam egg).

Whole egg in first (I don’t bother to separate the yolk from the white as my eggs have so little white in proportion).
Then salt and mustard (mustard helps the mayo emulsify, but I also like the zing).
Then any light oil (7/10ths of a cup for my little egg).
Finally, a teaspoon of lemon or vinegar, whichever you prefer to cut the oily taste.

Then zizz it up with the stick mixer, leaving the blades at the bottom until it’s done. The mixer will draw the oil down to itself at just the right pace. Makes a lovely stiff mayo. I make it in a screwtop jar, so there’s nothing to clean up afterwards but the stick mixer.

I really shouldn’t do it with my own eggs, though. My girls aren’t vaccinated against salmonella and they have lots of contact with wild birds.

Death by mayo. Tell everyone it’s how I would have wanted to go.

Three years later, I have come to edit the post. The site I found this recipe on is Ramona’s Cuisine. Thank you, Ramona. Never let it be said that I don’t credit my sources.


Comment from Zizz! Zizz! Zizz!
Time: August 11, 2020, 7:59 pm

Came for the Weasel thumb.
Leaving satisfied.

Comment from Skandia Recluse
Time: August 11, 2020, 8:09 pm

Boris makes mayonez

Then you will want to watch Slav King.
I would give you the youtube link but I fear the dreaded SPAM FILTER, so you will have to search youtube for Boris Slav King.

Comment from Armybrat
Time: August 11, 2020, 10:23 pm

You can use a sous vide stick to pasteurize your eggs for mayo or cookie dough that may be eaten raw. I do it all the time for my Mayo. 135F/57.2C for about an hour and a half. You do have a sous vide stick, don’t you? It’s my best friend in the kitchen after the stick blender.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: August 11, 2020, 10:55 pm

Back in the BV times I attended the Spa Formula One race in Belgium. The Belgians are all about their mayonnaise on French Fries. I was fascinated that the vendors at the race had perhaps 11 or 12 variations of flavored mayonnaise to chose from but no Ketchup. None, nada, zip, zero.

That’s okay because I am also mayo fan. The absolute best part of a Thanksgiving meal is the next day when you have a cold turkey breast sandwich, with lettuce, salt, pepper, and gobs of mayonnaise on goo bread.

That’s eatin’ right there.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: August 12, 2020, 1:06 am

I’m a great fan of mayonnaise, especially for fries, and especially especially for fried onion rings. Much better than ketchup to my taste.

Once I experienced the horror having a batch of nice hot fries and then finding somebody else had finished off the mayo and had failed to resupply the pantry. Aargh! In desperation, I tried tartar sauce. Y’know what? It’s pretty good on fries. I prefer mayo but once in a while tartar sauce is a pleasant change.

Warning: tartar sauce and onion rings to NOT play well together. It’s just WRONG.

Comment from Mitch
Time: August 12, 2020, 1:17 am

Wow, look at all the mayo aficionados coming out of the woodwork! I too love The White Condiment. I even love it’s oft-hated Bastard Son of The South – Miracle Whip.

For fries I make the Fry Sauce – equal mix of mayo and ketchup. I learned about that working at Wendy’s from one of the other cooks when I was a kid. Love. It.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: August 12, 2020, 3:49 am

@Mitch — Here’s an interesting tidbit. When I lived in Argentina a long time ago, that mixture of mayo & ketchup was called Salsa Golf and was served with steamed artichokes, and also with crudités. I prefer drawn butter with my artichokes, but Salsa Golf is a close second.

How it got that name I have no idea.

— break —

Silly me, I’ve never thought to do a DuckDuckGo search for it, and here it is!

Tart, fruity and sweet, and mainly composed of two staple ingredients, mayonnaise and ketchup, salsa golf is one of the most emblematic sauces of Argentine cuisine. It is also very popular in Uruguay.

It is reportedly the invention of Parisian Luis Federico Leloir who emigrated to Argentina and, as an accomplishment almost as important as this culinary invention, won the 1970 Nobel Prize in chemistry, although probably not for the salsa.

Comment from weasel again
Time: August 12, 2020, 8:39 am

I always thought tartar sauce was mayo + sweet pickle relish and McDonald’s secret sauce was mayo + ketchup + sweet pickle relish. Sadly, I cannot get appropriate relish here and have to buy ‘cocktail gherkins’ and cut them up myself. And Morrison’s is out of cocktail gherkins 🙁

Comment from Tim
Time: August 12, 2020, 11:12 am

I was not a fan of mayo until I tried what sounds like the stick blender recipe you found. I found it from chef John


Comment from BJM
Time: August 12, 2020, 3:29 pm

@Uncle Al…Mayo & lemon is my usual go to but I get bored and like to change it up. Garam masala & crushed garlic mixed into mayo is also very tasty with a warm artichoke…especially the Italian purple variety.

Right now I’m like all harissa all the time, so harissa + mayo on all the things.

@Stoaty, a tasty tartar sauce is more complex, mayo, horseradish, capers, sweet pickle, parsley and chives or finely cut green onions. It’s really tasty mixed with flaked cold poached salmon too for a sandwich spread.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 12, 2020, 3:54 pm

Damn you people.

I thought they made Tartar sauce out of Tartars.
The same way Gingerale is made from, well, gingers, and
shepherd’s pie is made, when best, from Swiss shepherds.

Mayo has always been difficult for me, owing to a terrible “joke” I was told as a child by one of my older brothers, and as many of you are obviously aficionados of the condiment, I will NOT share said joke, or even hint at it.

Comment from OldFert
Time: August 12, 2020, 4:56 pm

Mitch —
Miracle Whip is “salad dressing” (no idea why it’s called that, other than maybe it’s because it’s good for tuna salad and egg salad). Started using Miracle Whip in lieu of mayo when I was a kid in southern New Joisey. Maybe that’s why you see it as a southern thing.

For a really southern thang, it’s Duke’s Mayo. Duke’s mayo is *the* southern one. Mrs Fert swears by it.

I prefer Miracle Whip. Which puts me in good company since Iowahawk (Dave Burge of blog and twitter fame @iowahawkblog ) is a fan of MW. He’s even been thanked/appreciated it by the official Miracle Whip twitter site.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: August 12, 2020, 8:25 pm

My mother-in-law (RIP) made “tartar” sauce by adding finely minced red onion to Kraft Sandwich Spread, which is made with chopped pickles, vinegar, dried red bell peppers, dried onions and dried garlic. It is insanely delicious and she would make certain she had a box of fresh saltine crackers to serve along side because that’s the way she liked to eat the tartar sauce (on the cracker, not the fish). It’s good enough to eat with a spoon! If we are having fresh fish or shrimp I make a double batch of hushpuppies, the tartar sauce, then get out of the way.

My own mother, who grew up in San Francisco but became a Texan when she married my father during WWII—was making “fish sauce” with mayo and ketchup in the late 1940s. It’s what I grew up on until I married and learned my MIL’s recipe. JavaMan wants cocktail sauce—ketchup and horseradish cream. But he also loves his mother’s recipe, too.

Comment from currently
Time: August 13, 2020, 12:12 am

Get some Duke’s Mayo – the best.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 13, 2020, 12:33 am

I third the motion on Duke’s. And second the one for Miracle Whip.

I’ve been using Duke’s lately as a base for a very nice breading on “air fryer” Cod filets. They’re awesome.

Comment from Drew458
Time: August 15, 2020, 6:33 pm

Wait wait; this is a post about white condiments from Merry Olde, and it doesn’t mention salad cream at all?

Comment from BJM
Time: August 16, 2020, 2:34 am

Duke’s makes a good rib eye steak marinade…just smear it on.

Any of youse guys watching Alton Brown’s Quarantine Quitchen on YouTube? It’s very entertaining. His wife Elizabeth, who has the patience of Job, asked him how he knew something or the other would work and he says “Because I’m f-ing Alton Brown!” with a wolfish grin. I find his know-it-all schtick on Good Eats annoying, but he’s hilarious unfiltered.

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