Dead Pool 172: I think that’s the right number
BullDawgGuy wins with Rosalynn Carter. I went looking for some Rosalynn Carter fun facts, but there aren’t any. She was a nice, hard-working Southern lady who was married to a president and lived a long time. The end.
Tonight’s the first night of the year it’s dropping to freezing. I’m going to go crawl under something warm and wait for Spring. I’m thinking…a cow, maybe?
Are we ready?
0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody. Plus (Pupster’s Rule) no picking someone who’s only famous for being the oldest person alive.
1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).
2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.
3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.
4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay? Also, make sure you have a correct spelling of your choice somewhere in your comment. These threads get longish and I use search to figure out if we have a winner.
5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.
6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.
7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.
8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.
The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing on paper suffused with elephant shit particles. Because I’m fresh out
November 24, 2023 — 6:00 pm
Comments: 41
Happy T’day!
For reasons I can’t articulate, the traditional presidential pardon of the turkey pisses me off. I don’t know. I’d totally support the first guy who said, “screw it – let’s eat this bird!”
I did some digging around but, believe it or not, it isn’t clear when the tradition started. Maybe with Lincoln (but probably not). You’d think something to do with the office of the president would be better documented.
Uncle B pointed out to me some years ago that Americans have two turkey holidays a month apart, which doesn’t make a lot of sense. So we just have a “nice meal” on Thanksgiving. Tonight, it’s steak and a baked potato with – I hope – homemade dinner rolls. It’s so cold in the kitchen, I don’t know if I can get them to proof properly.
Happy Thanksgiving, y’all – and turn up tomorrow for the Dead Pool. Maybe I’ll even get the number right this time.
November 23, 2023 — 6:10 pm
Comments: 7
Whatever it was
Whenever I mention of St Leonard’s (the painting in yesterday’s post was sold out of a charity shop there), I think of this guy: the St Leonard’s Dragon.
Someone published a pamphlet in England in 1614 describing a nine-foot-long four-legged serpent with lumps on its back that left a stinky slime trail and could spit poison in a 64-foot stream. It lived in the forest and killed two people and two dogs.
God knows what it was – no other accounts appear anywhere and it’s never mentioned again – but I love this woodcut from the pamphlet. The mild look on the faces of the two corpses, and did you notice the dog’s shadow is pasted on backwards? The Seventeenth C was a funny time for art.
When I reread the article, though, it said this was near Horsham. St Leonards is nowhere near Horsham.
Sure enough, St Leonard’s Forest is a totally different place. According the article, it always had a reputation as a bad spot for serpents, ending with the 1614 account. The Anglo Saxon Chronicle, 770AD, says “Monstrous serpents were seen in the country of the Southern Angles that is called Sussex” and St Leonard was a dragon slayer.
It’s still a forest. Huh.
November 22, 2023 — 7:06 pm
Comments: 5
Cursed. CURSED!
This painting was recently sold for £20 at a junk shop near me. Then it was brought back. Then it was sold again. Then brought back. Then sold for £25.
Having acquired a reputation as accursed, it sold on Ebay to an attraction in London for £1,600. Yes, it’s a Hallowe’en story – I missed it at the time.
The article describes all the ill luck that supposedly has followed it, including to people at its final home.
Personally, I think it’s simply unnerving because her left eye is about twice the size of her right eye. It’s otherwise reasonably well painted, which somehow makes it worse.
People will only accept so much facial asymmetry.
RFK jr’s face gives me the willies. It’s like his left eye is trying to slide off his face, just like this guy (name that film!).
November 21, 2023 — 8:06 pm
Comments: 4
Wherein I tell on myself
Though I work for a historical society (no, I will not say ‘an’ historical society), my job is fairly physical. I have to set up tables and stack chairs and do a lot of minor janitorial work. I manage just fine. In fact, it’s a kick to have a job where I am prized for my youth and strength.
But we’ve just had a sad, rainy weekend where I sat in this comfy chair for two days hardly moving, and I’ve put my back out.
There’s a lesson in that, and I have resolutely refused to learn it for years.
The image is courtesy of deepai.org – the prompt was “a ferret lying on a sofa” in a Renaissance style. It’s not great, but my first try was “a weasel reclining on a sofa” in a fuzzy animal style, and the result was a pile of fur with two eyes set vertically at one end and a sort of nose on the other. Nightmare fuel.
Well, that was a short Dead Pool. Poor old Rosalynn Carter, cut down in her prime.
November 20, 2023 — 8:20 pm
Comments: 5
Dead Pool XXX: we can figure it out together
Rich Rostrom won the Dick with Frank Borman. That’s the easy bit. Then it gets complicated.
Rich, who tries to keep me honest, has been telling me for ages I have an ongoing screwup with the numbers, having the following sequence of Dead Pools:
157 8/26/22
158 9/16/22
159 10/14/22
160 11/4/22
161 12/30/22
162 1/6/23
163 2/10/23
164 3/10/23
165 4/28/23
166 6/16/23
157 7/7/23
158 9/1/23
159 9/8/23
and, of course, 160 – which he has just won. He told me all this before 160; I have no excuse. So this one is…171? I believe this issue is causing him actual, physical pain. My apologies.
Additionally, I have upset Steve’s kid, who picked gunman Robert Card. I blew it off because – as a lifelong, enthusiastic reader of true crime – I’m highly skeptical of time-of-death estimates. I did not realize he was invested in the pick enough to argue his case. It’s still no, but I apologize for blowing it off so casually.
Stand by for FUN:
0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody. Plus (Pupster’s Rule) no picking someone who’s only famous for being the oldest person alive.
1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).
2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.
3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.
4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay? Also, make sure you have a correct spelling of your choice somewhere in your comment. These threads get longish and I use search to figure out if we have a winner.
5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.
6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.
7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.
8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.
The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing on paper suffused with elephant shit particles. Because I’m fresh out of fairy shit particles.
November 17, 2023 — 6:00 pm
Comments: 51
Let me tell you how my day started
I was biking ahead of yet another storm this morning. Bearing in mind how wet I got the other day, I wore my full banana suit. I was tearing down the path when my bike suddenly shuddered to a halt.
Upon examination, a doggy poop bag had been picked up by the chain and wrapped securely around the gear shifting mechanism at the back. I mean, that sucker was cinched up tight.
For once, I wasn’t carrying my trusty Leatherman. Not even a pocket knife. What did I have?
My fingers, dear reader. My fingers.
I won’t overdramatize what happened next. I was able to pick away the neck of the bag in little bits and then advance the chain to free it. I don’t even know if there was poop in the bag.
It wasn’t like squeezing a pastry bag full of flaming dogshit, which is I’m sure the image that went through everyone’s mind. In fact, I even made it in ahead of the rain. But still – screw you, Thursday morning!
Dead Pool tomorrow! Comest thou here and choose!
November 16, 2023 — 7:47 pm
Comments: 6
Go outside and look up!
You won’t see this. I mean, you will see this, but tiny. But bigger than usual!
Actually, Jupiter was at its closest and brightest was on November 4, but Uncle B read on t’Internet that it was bright tonight and we ran outside and looked up and it sure was.
You may think a dot in the sky being slightly larger than usual isn’t very exciting, but Jupiter is special. At any given time, you can see up to four of Jupiter’s moons with an ordinary pair of binoculars.
The first time I read that, there was an unusual confluence and, sure enough, there I saw all four of them – dot-dot-dot-dot – in a perfectly straight line, evenly spaced, on the left side of Jupiter. Which looked totally fake and wrong.
Tonight I saw at least one moon, but holding binoculars to my face and staring up gave me the dizzies, so I didn’t persist.
Also visible with binoculars: NASA ladies lose their handbag in space. You can watch video of it tumbling through the cosmos. Not unheard of, but it does seem the lady astronauts lose their bags more often.
“In September 2023, the European Space Agency estimated 35,290 objects were being tracked and cataloged by the various space surveillance networks, with the total mass of objects orbiting Earth amounting to more than 11,000 tons.”
Wear a hat.
November 15, 2023 — 7:16 pm
Comments: 5
Wait…what?!?
This just landed in my inbox. I nearly threw it away thinking it was spam. I swear, I haven’t had any notification from the Home Office.
Guys. I did it! I’M GOING TO BE A LIMEY!
November 14, 2023 — 8:15 pm
Comments: 8
What’s brown and sticky?
Uncle B bought hisself a stick. Apparently, it’s a super special kind of walnut tree that can grow and fruit in a pot. He’s been deep in conversation with an expert walnut grower on the other side of the country and this is the result.
We shall see.
We were expecting another violent rainstorm today. I looked at the weather satellite this morning and reckoned I could outrun it.
I was wrong. I was absolutely drenched by the time I got to the office. It was early enough that I could peel off the outer layer and put it on radiators to dry out a bit, but I was stuck with the soaking wet jeans. Worse, my art club had its AGM this afternoon, so I stayed late. In my wet jeans.
I am shattered.
I had to do the minutes. I’m often asked to take notes at meetings because everyone tells me I take very good notes at meetings. Now, you may think this is a ploy to trick me into taking the notes because it’s an awful bore and nobody else wants to do it and…okay, maybe.
But I do take damn good minutes, and I’ll tell you my secret: I leave most of it out. I boil the meeting down to the main points and cut the crosstalk. By the time anyone else sees my minutes, that’s exactly the way they remember it going down.
The aging membership helps.
November 13, 2023 — 8:06 pm
Comments: 12