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Round 44: Springtime is just around the corner


Farewell to Hizzoner! Drew458 takes it with Ed Koch. A well-timed last-minute winning pick — well played, Mister 458! You deserve dick.

And now, for all you dick hopefuls out there…

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you don’t want the fabulous prize, you’re too smart to be a regular. It takes me forever to put them in the mail, packages go by slow boat, typically take minimum eight to ten weeks and lose the will to live along the way.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

The prize? Still a fabulous two-pack of Aunty’s Spotted Dick…!

Comments


Comment from steve
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:01 pm

Hugo Chavez


Comment from Fawn
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:01 pm

Bonnie Franklin.


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:02 pm

Former Houston Oilers’ coach/NFL player Jack Pardee.


Comment from thefritz
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:02 pm

Henry Kissinger


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:02 pm

Congrats on 1st, steve.


Comment from Davem123
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:02 pm

Christopher Dorner


Comment from mojo
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:04 pm

Fidel Castro


Comment from thefritz
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:04 pm

damn computer locked up on me…good luck steve.


Comment from Dustoffmom
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:07 pm

Betty White for the dick.


Comment from MrCaniac
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:11 pm

Nelson Mandela for the dick


Comment from Redd
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:32 pm

Christopher Dorner

And it can’t come soon enough…


Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:39 pm

I admit that I would be happier with either Boehner or Karl Rove, and would like a Sarlacc involved. However, my daughter pointed out that Baba Wawa [Barbara Walters] who is reported to be 83 years old, just was released from the hospital post-chicken pox. Herpes Zoster is downright dangerous for the elderly, and the sequalae are severely not conducive to long life.

Subotai Bahadur


Comment from Gromulin
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:49 pm

Zsa Zsa Gabor. She’s gotta go someday.


Comment from USCitizen
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:50 pm

Burt Bacharach


Comment from Montenegro
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:50 pm

I’m going with Muhammad ALI once again!!


Comment from Simon Oliver Lockwood
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:54 pm

Willie Mays – hope I’m wrong.


Comment from RushBabe
Time: February 8, 2013, 6:59 pm

Mickey Rooney.


Comment from cheshirelion
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:00 pm

Margaret Thatcher


Comment from Malcolm Kirkpatrick
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:06 pm

Ayman Zawahiri.


Comment from Hutch
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:09 pm

Eli Wallach


Comment from weaselwannabe
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:20 pm

Tony Bennett


Comment from BJM
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:27 pm

I’m going with George H.W. Bush…although I’m tempted with Salman Rushdie now that he’s back on the Splodeydope radar.


Comment from P2
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:41 pm

As much as it pains me for I like the old girl, but I gotta admit Elizabeth the Second, Queen of the realm, isn’t looking well. And she’s gotta run outta hats someday….. As a drunken friend so eloquently put it: God shave the Queen!


Comment from drew458
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:54 pm

Regis Philbin. Hey, the gossip mags put him on the cover this week, saying he’s on his last lap.

Oh, and congrats to Miz Stoaty, coming in at #180 of the top 150 Conservative websites..

My blog got diddly, so I’m pissy and envious. Maybe I should get me some chickens. Or ducks. Yeah! Nobody blogs about ducks!


Comment from stina
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:55 pm

Michael Moore.

I have some strip-mining equipment on standby (hope springs eternal).


Comment from AmericanGypsea
Time: February 8, 2013, 7:59 pm

Seriously, how can Chris Christie still be available? His doctor just said his fat was closing in on him.


Comment from JeffS
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:08 pm

Jimmy Carter.

PLEASE.


Comment from Pablo
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:13 pm

Bob Dole


Comment from Veeshir
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:18 pm

Ed Asner is a dick.

Oh, and I’m picking him for the dick.


Comment from steve
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:20 pm

DaveM123: Great Pick!


Comment from Michael
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:33 pm

Once again, I’m picking Rosalyn Carter

Sweasel!!!! Congrats on the million hits!

in re: Dorner, see also Rule Zero. Although there’s no date certain…


Comment from Deborah
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:42 pm

( … and darlink Zsa Zsa is still alive. I’d like to know drugs she is taking.)


Comment from Davem123
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:53 pm

Comment from steve

DaveM123: Great Pick!

It was a flash of inspriation when I saw that Hugo was taken already. I expect either Dorner himself or somebody else will take care of it shortly.


Comment from Janna
Time: February 8, 2013, 8:58 pm

Keith Richards


Comment from EZnSF
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:12 pm

Sally Jessy Raphael.
Just cuz.


Comment from gulliblepratt
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:29 pm

HRH Prince Phillip


Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:44 pm

Bashar al-Assad


Comment from Scott Jacobs
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:55 pm

First, I pick George HW Bush.

Second, dear Gypsea, that wasn’t Christie’s doctor that said that.


Comment from RealMc
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:57 pm

Jesse Jackson Jr before he serves a single day of his soon to be too short federal sentence.


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: February 8, 2013, 9:59 pm

Sir Sean Connery. He’s been looking awful lately.


Comment from StPatrick_TN
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:06 pm

Fred Phelps…please.


Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:08 pm

George Soros.


Comment from Armybrat
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:29 pm

Desmond Tutu


Comment from Bigsmarthuman
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:43 pm

Pete Seeger.


Comment from cobrakai99
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:43 pm

Staying with Hillary Clinton. Another random fall, probably helped by Bill.


Comment from Carl
Time: February 8, 2013, 10:47 pm

Ariel Sharon


Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:04 pm

Noam Chomsky


Comment from Spad13
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:09 pm

Amy Carter. Take the whole family out.


Comment from platypuss
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:11 pm

Back to Billy Graham.


Comment from Uncle Al
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:47 pm

David Rockefeller as usual.
May the Devil take him, the sooner the better!

Edit: Just to be completely clear, that’s David Rockefeller, Sr..


Comment from Mitchell
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:49 pm

All the good evil people got picked already so I’ll go with Abe Vigoda.


Comment from m
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:57 pm

senator lautenberg


Comment from Eirik
Time: February 8, 2013, 11:59 pm

Robert Mugabe. His government seems to have about $217 in the treasury, so I doubt his medical insurance is paid up.


Comment from Rodent
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:20 am

Chrissy Matthews, all that hate’s gotta be eatin’ his insides.


Comment from unkawill
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:32 am

Back to Dick Van Dyke for the dick.


Comment from Justin Credible
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:33 am

Olivia De Havilland


Comment from dissent555
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:40 am

Carol Channing (still).


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: February 9, 2013, 1:06 am

Mrs. Ted Turner (so identified cause it should piss the little woman off enough to trigger a fatal herpes outbreak!)


Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: February 9, 2013, 1:25 am

fuckity fuck fuck.

I’ll be back.


Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: February 9, 2013, 1:29 am

Okay, going with Pope Benedict.


Comment from ben
Time: February 9, 2013, 1:32 am

William Shatner, again…sigh!!!


Comment from PatAZ
Time: February 9, 2013, 2:04 am

Ex-Alderman Sandi Jackson, wife of JJJr. She might meet with an accident if she decides to testify against him


Comment from Nina
Time: February 9, 2013, 2:14 am

My infamous senator, DiFi.

That’s Diane Feinstein for you furriners.


Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: February 9, 2013, 2:54 am

The ‘Woz’, Steve Wozniak.

He’s not looking very healthy lately – and he dated Kathy Griffin… The STDs alone are enough to kill him.


Comment from Scott Jacobs
Time: February 9, 2013, 5:43 am

@PatAZ – She won’t be testifying against him, because he won’t stand trial.

Plea deal.

Don’t worry, thought… The stiff jail time JJJr. is up to see for this plea deal won’t ever happen. Teh One will either commute or pardon the poor dear.


Comment from Ghost
Time: February 9, 2013, 7:54 am

Sean Connery. He’s been old forever.


Comment from prm
Time: February 9, 2013, 9:05 am

Prince Phillip


Comment from Amiable Dorsai
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:02 pm

Mikhail Timofeyevich Kalashnikov, because it’s well past time.


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: February 9, 2013, 12:43 pm

It appears Davem123 is headed for victory. Apparently the SoCal cops are doing their usual bang-up job, trying to kill anyone and everyone in a blue pickup.


Comment from currently
Time: February 9, 2013, 2:20 pm

Harry Belafonte


Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: February 9, 2013, 3:32 pm

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: February 9, 2013, 1:25 am

fuckity fuck fuck.

I’ll be back.

.
Hilarious !!!!
.
.
I pick Hugh “Horn Dawg” Hefner.


Comment from Thursby
Time: February 9, 2013, 3:53 pm

Chuck Berry.


Comment from Nanny 1
Time: February 9, 2013, 3:55 pm

Annette Funicello


Comment from twolaneflash
Time: February 9, 2013, 4:19 pm

cowards. BARRY-BARACK-DUNHAM-HUSSEIN-SOETORO-FUCKING-TAKE-MY-GUN-AND-MURDER-ME-WITH-A-DRONE-OBAMA!

Psalms 109:8 May his days be few; may another take his office.


Comment from Vince
Time: February 9, 2013, 5:39 pm

harry Freakin Reid


Comment from Nina
Time: February 9, 2013, 6:00 pm

There are a large number of wish-fulfillment predictions on this here thread.

SWeas, the public service website. Making the world a better place since…whenever she started it.

;)


Comment from PatAZ
Time: February 9, 2013, 6:24 pm

I saw that this morning, Scott. And it seems Ms Jackson is feeling “thrown under the bus” by her hubby. Perhaps the tires hitting her will do her in.


Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: February 9, 2013, 7:14 pm

Comment from twolaneflash
Time: February 9, 2013, 4:19 pm

slight correction. Psalms 109: 8-14

Subotai Bahadur


Comment from Zimmermanfan
Time: February 9, 2013, 7:51 pm

Muhammad Ali………..


Comment from TwoDogs
Time: February 9, 2013, 10:50 pm

Ron Jeremy


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: February 9, 2013, 11:55 pm

Speaking of twolaneflash’s buddy, new action figures available…
http://www.herobuilders.com/barack_obama-action_figures.htm


Comment from sassamon
Time: February 9, 2013, 11:57 pm

Leslie Phillips, English Actor


Comment from little, little
Time: February 10, 2013, 1:18 am

Jerry Lewis…he’s still around, right? Love the man..er, boy.


Comment from smedleythebarbarian
Time: February 10, 2013, 2:45 am

Charlie Sheen
Reaching out to a psycopath.
I thought he’d tried every way to kill himself.
Appantly I’m wrong


Comment from Oceania
Time: February 10, 2013, 4:25 am

I hope that Scube liked his Dick?


Comment from naleta
Time: February 10, 2013, 4:29 pm

I’m going for Larry King this time.


Comment from acat
Time: February 10, 2013, 5:33 pm

I believe I’ll select David Letterman.

No, I don’t know anything, I just haven’t heard about him for a bit.. and he doesn’t have a healthy lifestyle …

Mew


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: February 10, 2013, 5:56 pm

Grand Ayatollah Sistani – which would be ugly. But he’s failing, apparently.


Comment from Tibby
Time: February 10, 2013, 7:41 pm

Mary Tyler Moore. Just because.


Comment from Mayor Doomberg
Time: February 10, 2013, 8:07 pm

Rachel Maddow. Lsebian love triangle gone awry!


Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: February 11, 2013, 12:45 pm

Pope is resigning! Does this mean I kinda get a dick? :)


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 11, 2013, 12:49 pm

It means I’ll stand on the shoreline and wave a dick in your general direction.

I’ll probably get arrested.


Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: February 11, 2013, 1:02 pm

Pics please.


Comment from Laughing Buddha
Time: February 11, 2013, 1:15 pm

Ronnie Biggs!


Comment from Veeshir
Time: February 11, 2013, 4:52 pm

I saw the Pope’s mug and name on the TV, before I realized it was for his retirement, my first thought was “Dam, I didn’t get him in Stoaty’s Dead Pool”.

Why do I have the feeling that one day I’ll be in Hell explaining these posts?


Comment from acat
Time: February 11, 2013, 5:10 pm

Did DaveM123 win?

http://now.msn.com/christopher-dorner-is-first-drone-target-on-us-soil

Mew


Comment from Redd
Time: February 11, 2013, 5:14 pm

He’s only a target in the sense that they are using drones to search for him. He’s not a target in the sense they are going to send a missile up his ass.


Comment from mojo
Time: February 11, 2013, 6:39 pm

I lit out from Reno, I was trailed by 20 hounds
Didn’t get to sleep last night till the morning came around
Set out runnin’ but I take my time
A friend of the devil is a friend of mine…


Comment from skinbad
Time: February 11, 2013, 9:53 pm

George H.W. Bush


Comment from mojo
Time: February 11, 2013, 10:25 pm

George W. Obama


Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: February 12, 2013, 7:42 am

Ah, man. Ron Jeremy. That’s low hanging fruit right there.

Okay, the visual that followed that statement made me throw up in my mouth a little.


Comment from LesterIII
Time: February 12, 2013, 6:52 pm

Since I’ve been around industrial apparatus pumping mega-volumes of raw sewage lately (not by choice, but it does smell like money), I pick Bob Schieffer. He and his are spewing more than any municipal lift-station could DREAM of pumping…


Comment from thefritz
Time: February 12, 2013, 9:24 pm

My money is on Davem123

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2013/02/manhunt-christopher-dorner-big-bear.html

Bet Dorner’s dead by midnight WBT


Comment from Davem123
Time: February 12, 2013, 11:07 pm

My best chance so far. He’s holed-up in a cabin, surrounded by people who know he’s there. Quite a change for the little bastard (his soul, not his body). All of his victims have been shot from ambush, unaware he was even there. I may have this Dick bronzed and mounted on a plaque in celebration.


Comment from steve
Time: February 13, 2013, 12:01 am

The Race Is On!

It’s neck and neck!

http://interamericansecuritywatch.com/doctors-notify-chavezs-family-of-the-venezuelan-presidents-imminent-death/


Comment from Pablo
Time: February 13, 2013, 12:23 am

The cabin is on fire, Davem123. Unless Hugo makes a quick move, you’ve got the inside track!


Comment from Davem123
Time: February 13, 2013, 1:11 am

I think it’s ” Ashes to Ashes” time for Dorner. I’ll be honored to accept the award, but I hate to think that Hugo could pass without a celebratory Dick.


Comment from mandel bread
Time: February 13, 2013, 2:19 am

Al Molinaro


Comment from Pablo
Time: February 13, 2013, 1:58 pm

I’d say we’ve got us a winnah!


Comment from acat
Time: February 13, 2013, 6:13 pm

DaveM, we can hope that Hugo doesn’t shuffle off until after 18:00 weasel time on Friday …

(and that S. Weasel puts up a new Dead Pool quickly, of course)

Mew


Comment from Montenegro
Time: February 13, 2013, 11:07 pm

So Ms Weasel…we need a ruling….does Davem123 take the dick???


Comment from Laughing Buddha
Time: February 13, 2013, 11:17 pm

Looks like Davem123 wins unless we need some sort of DNA test for his charred corpse.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 13, 2013, 11:23 pm

Yep. Davem123 takes the dick. I’m a few dicks behind mailing them out, so if the charred thing fails a DNA test, Dave can be de-dicked again.

See you here Friday.


Comment from Redd
Time: February 13, 2013, 11:37 pm

Why not send him black pudding? You know – that stuff that looks like tar heroin in a can?

http://goo.gl/kixpu

I’ve never tried it. It looks revolting interesting.


Comment from Redd
Time: February 15, 2013, 4:28 pm

Oh, shit! Hugo’s out of his coma! http://goo.gl/GPUFs

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