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Chickens. Eating catfood.

Wow, is it midnight already?

Busy day. Took Mapp to the vet (she’s the ginger one, top left). Possibly myco infection — swollen eyes, general lack of condition. She got a shot and an antibiotic tonic for her water. She was a real trooper at the vet’s, too. Go chicken!

Then there’s the Jubilee celebration this weekend. I’m on the entertainment committee. Really. Off out buying bunting and beer. Her Maj has given her subjects a *four* day weekend. Sixty more years!

Anyhoo. Back here. Tomorrow. Six WBT. ROUND 32. Be here or be somewhere else!

May 31, 2012 — 11:21 pm
Comments: 35

What a terrible, terrible season

Doc Watson is gone.

What a terrible Spring this has been. Earl and then Doc – my two greatest instrumental heroes. Did you know, despite being North Carolina boys, the two didn’t meet until long after they were famous?

We’ll start a new Pool Friday, and hope for someone well and truly
rotten to go this time.

I’m going to have Deep River Blues stuck in my head all day.

May 30, 2012 — 11:59 am
Comments: 31

Mutual of Freaking Omaha

Seriously, this is in my back yard. Actually, has been for a week. They don’t nest here; they nest up the canal somewhere. They come to this spot — mama, papa and seven cygnets — to catch the afternoon sun.

Thank goodness for the ditch between us. Papa swan lunges and hisses when I get close to take pictures. I’d just as soon not test the old wives’ tale that these things can break a man’s arm.

There’s another happy family unit up the creek aways, by our neighbor’s farm. Six babies plus two unhatched eggs. Sadly, just three babies this morning. Stupid foxes.

I saw our lot again this today and they’re all okay. So, woot.

Note to young persons and foreigners: the insurance company Mutual of Omaha once sponsored an iconic ’60s wildlife program called Wild Kingdom.

May 29, 2012 — 10:03 pm
Comments: 30

Happy Memorial Day

In honor of Memorial Day, I thought I should post something with absolutely gigantic balls.

Yep, they sheared the gentlemen sheep for Summer this week, making their professional qualifications plain to see.

Off early. Tomorrow morning, I’m going out with a local farmer and his wife to see ’round their flock. In a word, I am going lookering.

Local sheep trivia: a person who looks after sheep is a looker, and the thing he does for a living is lookering. No fooling.

May 28, 2012 — 9:45 pm
Comments: 19

Round 31: I think I got the count right, finally (thanks, Rich!)

Steve is our first ever Triple Dick Winner, taking the puddings with Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi. Another excellent choice, sir, and well deserving of dick. Except, I can’t remember if Steve accepts his dicks (believe it or not, not everyone does).

Okay, here we go. First contest of the long, hot Summer of Dick:

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you don’t want the fabulous prize, you’re too smart to be a regular. It takes me forever to put them in the mail, packages go by slow boat, typically take minimum eight to ten weeks and lose the will to live along the way.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

What do we want? Aunty’s dick! When do we want it? Eventually!

May 25, 2012 — 6:00 pm
Comments: 107

Rollcall of the Dicks

Finally got around to doing this – making up a master list of Dead Pool winners. The numbering got a little wobbly in the middle, and again at the end (next round will be 30, not 29 — erm, I think). Let me know if you spot any other problems.

1. Enas Yorl – Ted Kennedy
2. Mongo – Patrick Swayze
3. Princess Bernie – Susan Atkins
4. Sockless Joe – Alexander Haig
5. nachogranny – Peter Graves
6. EZnSF – Art Linkletter
17. Tawny – Gary Coleman
18. Steve – John Wooden
29. Steve – Robert Byrd
10. Sherlock – Dan Schorr
11. MrCaniac – Barbara Billingsly
12. Harbqll – Liz Taylor
13. Montenegro – Osama bin Laden
14. DeGuerre – Harmon Killebrew
215. Tawny – Jeff Conaway
16. Grasshopper – Nick Charles
skip two?
18. thefritz – Delores Hope
19. Mrs Hill – Anwar al-Awlaki
20. Formerly Known as Skeptic – Moammar Gadhafi
21. Oh, hell – Andy Rooney
22. Veeshir – Harry Morgan
123. Mrs Peel – Christopher Hitchens
224. Mrs Peel – Kim Jong Il
25. Xul – Etta James
26. Mr and Mrs Weaselwannabe – Joe Paterno
27. FGW – Dick Clark
28. Pablo – Chuck Colson
329. Steve – Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi

Thus confirming that Steve (wherever he is) is our first Triple Dick Winner.

You — yes, you! — could see your name on the Roll of Dicks. Be here, tomorrow, 6pm WBT, and start your personal journey to Dick!

May 24, 2012 — 10:36 pm
Comments: 25

So happy together…

President Barack Obama talks with Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev of Russia on the Laurel Cabin patio during the G8 Summit at Camp David, Md., May 19, 2012. (Official White House Photo by Pete Souza)

Gosh, these two look comfy together, don’t they?

May 23, 2012 — 10:19 pm
Comments: 31


Water main break on Weasel Street! Our neighbors — poor bastards — look like they’ve got an ‘orrible mess to clean up.

We’ve been without water all afternoon. Uncle B informs me that, in the absence of water, an Englishman drinks champagne. That I can live with. Yessiree.

It’s been the first really hot day of Summer and we’ve been out in the garden drinking and cavorting about and I am unfit to operate heavy machinery. See you tomorrow…!

May 22, 2012 — 9:32 pm
Comments: 9

President Obama speaks earnestly into a banana

Yes, this exists in color!

Part of a series, with Dan Rather Listens Earnestly to a Banana. I don’t know. Honestly I don’t. <sobs into her hands>

<sits up, wipes her face with her palms>

Okay, we have a winner — Steve takes the dick with Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed al-Megrahi. Poor Fawn was in first with Robin Gibb, but he died between Dead Pools, thus depriving her of her rightful dick. Nope, never gets old.

See you here Friday at 6pm WBT for Round 29!

May 21, 2012 — 10:27 pm
Comments: 23

Silent but deadly

I love this picture, which probably is not accurately depicted by the caption. Probably.

I nicked it off this National Review article. He says Oprah started her long decline after choosing to endorse Obama over Hillary, shocking her (mostly white, mostly female) fans by choosing the black thing over the girl thing. Hilarious if true.

Identity politics is hard.

Early in our relationship, Uncle B treated me to a lecture on The Problem With Americans: we sit around watching opera all day and take our marching orders from opera and only think what opera tells us to.

And I was, like, “that’s just so weird and wrong and unfair. I mean, my dad quite likes Verdi, but he’s the only American I know who’s really into opera.”

I have, of course, stepped on my own punchline here: he meant Oprah, he just can’t talk right. He’s English.

Which is really weird because, here again, my dad is the only American I know who’s really into Oprah.
PSYCH! Good weekend, everyone!

May 18, 2012 — 10:30 pm
Comments: 28