web analytics

Face panties! For your cat!

Just something I found while I was looking for something else on eBay. Straight from China!

They’re supposed to protect you while you groom or otherwise do things to your cat.

I dunno. Every cat I’ve ever known, presented with one of these, would flip out and run backwards screaming. And, some fine Summer’s night when you least expect it, murder you in your sleep.

Hello and welcome to the second week in June.

Comments


Comment from tonycc
Time: June 11, 2018, 9:34 pm

This covers the teeth, which is the last thing I worry about when near a cat. What about the other four pointy ends, each of which can cause serious damage alone or even death when used in concert?

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: June 11, 2018, 10:27 pm

That is a very, very horrible thing!

 


Comment from Ric Fan
Time: June 11, 2018, 10:48 pm

I hate when you are scratching a cat and then they want you to stop and bite you but wont let you pull your hand away bc they have their claws in you. Little psychos.

 


Comment from Anonymous
Time: June 11, 2018, 10:56 pm

You misunderstand how to use them. You’re supposed to soak them in ether before you apply them to the cat. At that point, they would NOT “flip out and run backwards screaming.” And their other pointy bits would not be any worry, either.

 


Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 12, 2018, 12:44 am

It is now quite clear that the Chinese hate us and want us all dead.

 


Comment from DurnedYankee
Time: June 12, 2018, 1:16 am

Apparently they don’t wake up in the middle of the night with a cat leaning over them with “that look” in their eyes.

“Say goodbye Yankee….”

In fact I just promised Delilah I was NOT going to get her one of ‘these’.

Mrs Durned, bless her, does not know a thing about cats, and even though we’ve had one now for about 5 years I don’t think she’s ever actually picked her up. Early on, to the amusement of self and son #3 (who had 3 cats when he had an apartment with his buddy), she came home one day with a cat halter and lead because she was going to ‘walk’ the cat. Much entertainment followed until she tasked the two of us with performing said walk. Ours was not to question why, ours was but to…you know…and she got her first cat running backward and screaming demonstration.
Since then she says hi to the cat, feeds her, lets her in and out, but otherwise stays clear. She thinks she has performed big magic when the cat jumps up on the bed and sits next to her in the early morning hours before strolling across the headboard to remind us who our true master is.

 


Comment from Ric Fan
Time: June 12, 2018, 2:22 am

Saw the grossest video on twitter. Guy eating soup in a chinese restaurant. He scoops up what looks like a piece of meat in his spoon. You can see the little nose, the area below the nose, and the upper lip. Meow. Think it was filmed in the US.

 


Comment from Wolfus Aurelius
Time: June 12, 2018, 2:27 pm

Comment from DurnedYankee
Time: June 12, 2018, 1:16 am
. . .

Mrs Durned, bless her, does not know a thing about cats, and even though we’ve had one now for about 5 years I don’t think she’s ever actually picked her up. Early on, to the amusement of self and son #3 (who had 3 cats when he had an apartment with his buddy), she came home one day with a cat halter and lead because she was going to ‘walk’ the cat. Much entertainment followed until she tasked the two of us with performing said walk. Ours was not to question why, ours was but to…you know…and she got her first cat running backward and screaming demonstration. . . .
*
*
The late Marie-Antoinette loved walking on a leash. In fact, only the third time I brought the harness and lead out, she ran to the door crying — clearly, “Let’s go!!!” However, she was extraordinarily smart and adaptable. I wouldn’t try this on any other cat who hadn’t displayed those same traits. The current big black cat, Wolf, wouldn’t let me put the harness on him, and the white-and-black, Chekov, ran when I tried it, too. So no evening strolls with my current beasts, I guess.

And regarding the cat masks, yes, some ether sounds like a good idea. . . .

 


Comment from AliceH
Time: June 12, 2018, 3:02 pm

The mask probably works, when it works at all, more by covering the whiskers rather than than the eyes. Cats’ whiskers are hard wired into the brain’s instinctive responses. Visual stimulus goes through a tiny bit of conscious analysis before any action is taken. That’s my theory, based on literally minutes of thinking about it just now.

I’d never put this on my cat. I did try the harness thing when she was a kitten, but after she learned she couldn’t bite it off, she switched tactics to pretending she was dead. She’d let me put the harness on but not walk her – just drag her limp kitty body around the floor. Well played, cat. No more harness!

 


Comment from Steve Skubinna
Time: June 12, 2018, 3:57 pm

Do they come shaped like a little hockey goalie mask? And maybe little Hannibal Lector face masks too?

I could also see a Darth Vader pattern selling well.

 


Comment from Monty James
Time: June 13, 2018, 9:35 pm

If you and your cat are into that sort of thing, and you’re both consenting, who am I to judge?

 

Write a comment

(as if I cared)

(yeah. I'm going to write)

(oooo! you have a website?)


Beware: more than one link in a comment is apt to earn you a trip to the spam filter, where you will remain -- cold, frightened and alone -- until I remember to clean the trap. But, hey, without Akismet, we'd be up to our asses in...well, ass porn, mostly.


<< carry me back to ol' virginny