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You know what I love about being a drunk?

Every day has the potential to be April Fool’s and Christmas morning rolled into one.

Like the morning I woke up and my bedroom furniture had been completely rearranged. Not knocked over, mind. Carefully rearranged. (Okay, actually…that morning scared the shit out of me and I toned it way down for a while).

Today I got a package in the mail: a book I have no memory of ordering. It’s like a present from Drunken Me to Sober Me. Drunken Me has pretty good taste and knows better than to order anything over ten bucks or so, so I’m not bothered.

Looks interesting. Spam Kings: The Real Story behind the High-Rolling Hucksters Pushing Porn, Pills, and %*@)# Enlargements. Under three dollars, hardback, in Amazon buy it used. I love buy it used.

Though why they insisted on misspelling ‘$*!)@’, I have no idea.


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: February 14, 2007, 9:31 pm

Have you ever hidden money in a Good Safe Hiding Place while drunk and then forget where you put it? I did that a few times when I was poor and living in a crapartment. I was paranoid about people breaking in and stealing my rent money while I was gone, or asleep. Oh, the fun joy of searching for my money when I discovered it wasn’t in the Usual Hiding Place.

Comment from Alissa
Time: February 14, 2007, 11:08 pm

Does this new website mean you can cuss? I haven’t wanted to mention it on wordpress but for the longest time I’ve felt that the ‘where’s weasel’ boston bean badge in the corner looks like a caricature of an aromatic, disembodied penis.

You can moderate that if you really wanna, but it’s true.


…Is mustelid addiction anything like muskrat love?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2007, 5:25 am

Hey, you could cuss on the old one. I certainly did. Though only the publisher of Spam Kings thinks “penis” is de trop.

One aromatic, disembodied penis, or two? Because I can understand it if it’s two.

Personally, I was always creeped out by Vienna sausages. And not only because they taste nasty. In the rural South, it’s pronounced Vye-eena sausages. Which just makes it nastier.

Comment from Alissa
Time: February 15, 2007, 3:32 pm

I only see one. See, the bean on the left is the head, and the bean on the right is the rod, the head is as big as the rod and thats why I say ‘caricature’ cuz in caricatures there’s always a gargantuan head.

See? Do you see it? look sideways. Once you see it, you’ll never stop being aware of it again, kinda like when you learn for the first time what hotdogs are made out of.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: February 15, 2007, 4:30 pm

Hey, everybody! Meet Alissa! Alissa sees penises.

Okay, okay…I can see it, if I follow your instructions. So I flipped one of the beans the other way ’round.We won’t have any seeing of penises around here, Missy. (Actually, I thought about replacing it with a photograph of an actual penis, and then claiming I couldn’t see it. That’s when I realized there were things even I wouldn’t do).

Anyway…ha ha. Fooled you. I’m in Providence. I just haven’t gotten around to drawing that one yet…

Comment from TXMarko
Time: February 22, 2007, 1:19 pm

I once hid a set of keys in a VERY safe place from the Grandkids whilst imbibing… took me over 5 months to locate the bastards once the danger had passed….

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