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Triffid Grove

I went to tea at a neighbor’s this afternoon with several nice old ladies, one of which is an actual lady. As in Lady So-and-so. It was all very congenial. No cucumber sandwiches, but there were homemade cheese straws and digestive biscuits.

On the way out, I was astonished to discover our hostesses’ artichoke grove. This is just a section of it; it went on for yards and yards. She said it springs up of its own accord every year. She gave some away and let the rest bloom.

I was rather proud of our two large, plump artichokes and the several little ‘uns we let go to flower (they are rather pretty thistles. The Victorians grew them as ornamental plants).

And that was the first social outing I’ve had in four months.

I don’t care what the government says, I think I’m rather done with this lockdown shenanigans.

p.s. Oh! And one of the old ladies did exclaim, “blow me!” at one point. My day is complete.

p.p.s. Have a good weekend, everyone.


Comment from ea
Time: August 14, 2020, 7:40 pm

I need to get off my lazy butt and start gardening again.
I grew cardoons once (didn’t eat them) and they were so pretty. I need to try artichokes. I wonder if deer will eat artichokes? Dumb question-of course they will.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: August 14, 2020, 8:33 pm

I had to chuckle when Her Stoatliness said where she was off to this afternoon It all seemed a bit Jane Austen and it may surprise some readers to learn that Our Leader is, er, not really a Jane Austen kinda gal.

Still, apparently she didn’t bite anyone. Which was nice.

As for artichokes, we are also, at Madam’s behest, growing Jerusalem artichokes for the first time this year, as well as the common or garden globe variety. I am mildly perturbed to note that they are already about nine or ten feet tall and seem impervious to the drought we’ve been experiencing. I assume they will stop growing at some point.

Apparently they are colloquially known as ‘fartychokes’ because they, er, make you do that. That’s also not very Jane Austen who, I’m told, had very few fart jokes in her stories.

‘It is a truth universally acknowledged, that….paaarp!’

There. A great improvement, as I’m sure we can all agree.

Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: August 14, 2020, 10:06 pm

I’ve an Australian buddy who exclaims, “fuck oh dear” when he’s distressed about something. I find it charming for some reason.

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: August 14, 2020, 11:30 pm

Hopefully if that lady is ever in the presence of Kamala, she won’t repeat that phrase. After all, that is how Kamala rose to her position in government. Willie Brown insists that she is every bit as qualified as Monica!!!

Comment from OldFert
Time: August 15, 2020, 12:56 am

Hmm. Jerusalem artichokes impervious to the heat and drought. Hmm. (I thought it was drouth over there, by the way).

Well, of course the Jerusalem variety grows well in drought. Jerusalem’s in a freaking DESERT, n’est-ce pas?

Comment from dissent
Time: August 15, 2020, 3:11 am

At work a few days ago I noted that there was an impressive storm approaching from the west on the weather radar (phone app). I took a look through one of the west exit doors near me and saw the swirling deep deep blue cloud front coming in, being led by an even darker blue/black cloud band.

Then the tornado sirens started sounding.

I beat it for an interior shelter and didn’t see or hear a thing from outside.

Heard later that it was quite the show.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: August 15, 2020, 2:37 pm

@dissent. Shudder. Damn, I hate tornados. Was this in the midwest?

Comment from dissent
Time: August 15, 2020, 3:58 pm

dupage county IL

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: August 15, 2020, 7:06 pm

I’m glad you had somewhere safe to wait out the storm.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 15, 2020, 7:52 pm

I used to think I wanted to ‘see’ a Tornado.

After all these years in Texas and Oklahoma, I’m now grateful I never have and hope I never will.

Comment from lauraw
Time: August 15, 2020, 11:33 pm

Jerusalem Artichoke is not a true artichoke but a type of sunflower, grown for its underground tubers.

I’ll see myself out, no need to be so rough

Comment from BJM
Time: August 16, 2020, 2:39 am

@Mark… it was rumored in the Bay Area that Kamala could suck the chrome off a bumper. Wait…maybe that was Grace Kelly. Never mind.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: August 16, 2020, 6:51 am

Quite right, Lauraw. What’s more it doesn’t even come from Jerusalem. A bit on imposter, in fact.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: August 16, 2020, 1:34 pm

The Pioneer

I seek in anonymity’s cloister
Not him, who ate the first raw oyster,
But one who, braving spikes and prickles,
The spine that stabs, the leaf that tickles,
With infinite patience and fortitude
Unveiled the artichoke as food.
— Ogden Nash

Comment from OldFert
Time: August 17, 2020, 1:24 am

Doesn’t come from Jerusalem? I’m crushed.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: August 17, 2020, 9:43 am

Uncle B! Next you’ll be trying to convince me that Macadamia nuts don’t come from Macadamia!

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