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I has a visa!

shiny

It is very shiny. They apparently have some kind of weird-ass color bubblejet, because it’s printed right on the first blank page of my passport. How you print a hologram dealie, I do not know.

So! I totally finished packing last night. I mean, everything but the plate I eat on and the cat’s bowl, the things I’ll throw in a FedEx on my way out of town. Would you believe, I don’t have a mover yet? Last one coming to quote today.

Whee!

sock it to me

Comments


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 9:51 am

Stoaty – what about the Weaselmobile – your li’l sporty car?

I’d like to think you’re gonna abandon it at the airport – with a body or sumpin in it as sort of a joke – but I bet you have better plans for it.

 


Comment from Gnus
Time: November 19, 2008, 10:22 am

Yer Stoatliness, if ya leaves the car at the airport, be sure and file the VIN off. Not that I would know, or anything. Just a guess.

Now that ya gots a visa, how does it work with those ATMs and stuff where ya has to swipe it? As good as a Mastercard?

 


Comment from dfbaskwill
Time: November 19, 2008, 10:25 am

A visa paid with a Mastercard?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 11:30 am

Heh. The kid that’s buying my house has some experience selling cars, so I’m letting him sell it for me and take a commission. My real estate agent is picking me and Charlotte up at the house and taking us to the closing, and from there to the airport (might as well earn some of that damned fee). She offered.

The agent asked him if he’d like a final walkaround on the day of closing, and he was like, “nah. I have her car. I’m sure everything will be fine.”

She told me this, consumed with awe that I’m leaving him my car, and I’m like, “I know where he lives. I’m sure everything will be fine.”

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 19, 2008, 11:47 am

Who’d try to double-cross a weasel?

 


Comment from harbqll
Time: November 19, 2008, 11:49 am

Besides, he wouldn’t dare risk the wrath of the intertube minions…

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 11:54 am

Anybody can double-cross a weasel.

Once.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:13 pm

One-Step Programme For Fitting In With The Limeys:

1. Always have Imperial Margarine on hand (or, if you prefer, on bread)

PS It doesn’t hurt to acquire skill at misspelling words like program, honor and center, and pronouncing schedule “shed-yule”

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:25 pm

Don’t forget to ‘unpack’ your car. ๐Ÿ™‚

 


Comment from Dawn
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:30 pm

Cross your fingers. My buyers are signing their loan docs today! And we only have to give the bank $3,000. Thanksgiving is gonna be sweet this year.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:32 pm

Ooo, yeah, Jill. Very good tip. Also, Weez, don’t forget to ‘unload’ your purse, ‘field strip’ your fanny pack, and ‘uncock’… um, whatever you may have ‘cocked.’

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:37 pm

Congratulations, Dawn! That’s a stroke of luck, in the middle of THIS shit-storm.

Yeah, JW, I’m accustomed to stripping my person of questionable items before getting on a plane. The bullet-shaped NRA charm I wear around my neck (signed by Charlton Heston!). My pocketknife. I haven’t screwed this up yet.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:37 pm

…but do not – repeat – do not get hoist upon your own petard!

 


Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: November 19, 2008, 12:56 pm

Heh. Fanny pack. That never gets old.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 1:15 pm

Personally, I only hoist my own petard until I needed glasses.

/diminishing the level of conversation for over half a century

/or in Steamboat’s case, raising the level. “Teeth” indeed!

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 1:31 pm

Say, plug your name and zip code into WhitePages.com and see if it guesses your age right!

It got mine (and my house and driving directions to it), but that’s all. TWWSNTM has lived in the area all her life, and it got her parents’ names and where she went to High School and all kinds of stuff…

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 19, 2008, 1:38 pm

Congratulations, Dawn! That’s a great result ๐Ÿ™‚

 


Comment from Farmer Joe
Time: November 19, 2008, 2:04 pm

Make sure you learn which words to anglicize (Jag-you-are,) and which ones not to (rest-ron).

 


Comment from bad cat robot
Time: November 19, 2008, 2:20 pm

O Weas, guess what software company I am currently employed by … ๐Ÿ˜‰

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 2:39 pm

Weez! WEEZ!!!!!!!

Thank Obama I caught you in time! You don’t need to go to England any more! Everything edible in England is already available right here! Obama Bless America!!!!!

Whew! That was friggin’ close!

 


Comment from steve
Time: November 19, 2008, 3:12 pm

โ€ฆbut do not – repeat – do not get hoist upon your own petard!

Rather…get moist with your own mustard.

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 3:23 pm

Ewwww.

(Actually, that sounds kinda hot. That doesn’t make me a preevert, right?)

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 3:35 pm

*ahem*

I note that the Indian navy is not weinering around with so-called “International Law” and other such sweet-flavored crap and has just recently killed a bunch of pirates until they died quite a bit. They also sank their boat all the way down to the bottom of the sea. Harrumph! Well executed, Indians! Woot! No prisoners! Yessah!

Good for them. I think the Mantle Of International Balls has passed on from the US – which is now totally wussified – to India! Yay, India. Bring on the Tandori chicken, Nan bread, and those warm honey-soaked bread balls that are so vulgar.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 3:56 pm

I have a sneaking fondness for India. Must be all that damn Kipling I read as a child. They’re my favorite non-Western team for the 21st C.

Moon launch, rivaling Google Earth, now this. Go India!

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 19, 2008, 3:59 pm

Yeah, the moon launch is teh kewl. But, maybe someone can explain to a poor, bewildered badger why they need so much friggng aid, now?

 


Comment from steve
Time: November 19, 2008, 5:09 pm

Drat the luck….

But this particular guide to survival amidst the peerage and what-not, appears to be out of print.

http://www.amazon.com/Unexpurgated-Code-Complete-Survival-Manners/dp/0440192293

One would think that it would be an important document as you begin your indoctrination into all things British.

This, even though the author was mistfortunate to be Irish, himself.

Perhaps you should dispatch Badger to poke about in the rubbish bins in the vicinity, to see if he cannot turn up a copy….for your edumucation….

Pip, pip…Balderdash and all that rot!

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 5:45 pm

Hey Swease…the hologram dealie? That’s made by taking very thin plastic film and under low temperatures, in a pressurized argon gas environment, applying a thin PVD (plasma vapor deposition) coating of silver and then making the hologram. The hologram ‘stickers’ are probably bought by the embassies very much like postage, kept in a secure area and applied as needed, like a notary stamp.

PVD coatings explained here: http://www.angstromsciences.com/technology/sputtering-technology/index.html

(the pink image is the glow created by the argon gas when electricity is applied)

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 5:47 pm

“Everything edible in England is already available right here!”

Uhhhh…Uncle B?

๐Ÿ˜‰

 


Comment from porknbean
Time: November 19, 2008, 6:15 pm

I lummee some Indians like I lumme some Mormons. Never met a one I didn’t like.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 6:22 pm

That’s true, PnB. I think Mormonism is creepy as hell, but I never met a Mormon who wasn’t likeable and straight up.

I might’ve knowed someone here would know exactly how those hologram dealies are made, Jill.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 6:25 pm

That holo explanation Jill gave was waaaay hot.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 6:30 pm

Okay, so I have to turn in my car plates, but I checked the website and I can do that by mail. Supposed to be both of them — if I only have one, I have to report it to the po-lice. Well, whatever — I’m keeping the one on the back. I have personalized plates and I’m sentimental.

So I take the mangled one off the front (hit a snowbank in the employee lot), put it in an envelope, go to the PO and get the proper postage to send it in when I’m all done with the car on Tuesday.

Get home. It’s gone. Can’t find it anywhere.

Best case scenario: somebody found it and will put it in the mail. I’m driving around on dead plates for a couple of days, but what are the odds I get pulled over? If I do, I tell my story.

Worst case scenario: nobody puts it in the mail. I think the chances of someone illegally putting a WEEZUL plate on the back of a stolen car are pretty remote.

Either way, I get to England and write a letter explaining everything, with a British postmark and everything.

Isn’t this fun?

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 6:47 pm

Ya know, Weez, you could help police departments across the U.S. with a few simple snail-mails. Just send them letters confessing to the various unsolved crimes they still have open files on. They pin the [fill in felony here] on you, you live free as a weasel in Jollye Olde, everybody’s happy, and Bob’s your uncle!

/I should charge for this stuff

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 7:25 pm

I have to come back, JW. I own sixty acres of rocks and rattlesnakes just outside Nashville.

That’s my retirement account, that is.

 


Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 19, 2008, 7:44 pm

Jill’s right – just show me the American butcher’s shop where you can buy black pudding, sheep hearts, pigs’ trotters, ox tongue and tripe!

Umm… wait a minute… any room on board for a badger? I won’t make a mess.

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 7:56 pm

Um, JW? There’s this messy little detail known as extradition.
It is teh suck.

Folks, you’d be surprised how much plasma vapor deposited thin films you encounter DAILY.

Those potato chip and snack bags that are kinda mirror finished on the inside? Yep.

Your 8 year old daughter’s hologram Hello Kitty stickers on her lunch box? Absolutely.

Wear-resistant coatings on your pliers and drill bits? Hell to the yeah.

Let’s not forget cds and dvds…without PVD coatings, they’d be thin plastic discs begging to be made into a funk-ay room divider.

As a matter of fact, once the low temperature depositing technology was refined and used en mass, the possibilities of use exploded exponentially.

I used to work for the company listed in the URL.
Alot of the images I P’shopped for them are still in use on the website. ๐Ÿ™‚

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:03 pm

Just look at all of the applications:

http://www.angstromsciences.com/applications/sputtering-applications/general-applications/index.html

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:04 pm

Stares at Jill and blinks thrice, slowly.

 


Comment from Jill
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:16 pm

(waves hand in front of a weasel snout) Come on, snap out of it!

๐Ÿ™‚

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:18 pm

Something different: Meat Water.

http://dinnerinabottle.com/beef-stroganof

I may have to try this, just for bragging rights.

 


Comment from Anonymous
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:22 pm

I was just telling Uncle B about bacon flavored bourbon, McGoo. I forgot who first posted the recipe, but everybody’s crossposting it now. (I say that because I’m too lazy to go look up the URL).

Not as vile as it sounds. Last step is to stick it in the freezer. All the fat solidifies and floats to the top. Only the *flavor* is volatile in alcohol.

 


Comment from harbqll
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:23 pm

Wait a minute, what?

Meat water? You’re kidding. No, really. This is a joke, right?

For reals? Meat-flavored water? Like…broth, but you can see through it?

i can haz?

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:25 pm

Eh. Anonymous was me. I got my ThinkPad back from the shop with a brand new hard disk and a minimum of applications. Somehow, I couldn’t bear to put Opera on it. That’s been my favorite browser for years, but lately I’ve had mystery problems with it.

I’m on at the moment using K-Meleon (which is usually typo’d as K-Melon but actually is a cutesy way of rendering chameleon). It was billed as the smallest and lightest browser to use the Mozilla foundations.

So far…um. Okay.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:29 pm

Is there any bacon flavored scotch, Anon (would that be jwp?).

harbqll – I posted it believing its legit. So far as I know it is. Glen Reynolds had a link somewhere, I think.

I gotta try it. I think it’s interesting that they recommend drinking it at room temp – or even warmed. Odd, that…

Didi you see the “Dirty Hot Dog” flavor?

Oops..there I go….

 


Comment from jwpaine
Time: November 19, 2008, 8:59 pm

Don’t let Jill scare you, Weez. Extradition is a legal-sounding term that doesn’t really mean anything. Like concatenative assemblage.

 


Comment from Allen
Time: November 19, 2008, 9:03 pm

I had to buy a new computer a few months ago, it went, ummm, belly up. I’ve been slowly adding stuff back, which is a pain ’cause I had a bunch of licenses to renew. I just got Cheetah running again, and nothing blew up.

Ha…Ha…Ha…Thud.

Weasel, on the RC thing, it sure stuck in my mind as a comedian’s bit. Another southern breakfast of champions: a honey bun and a Pepsi.

 


Comment from porknbean
Time: November 19, 2008, 9:09 pm

wOOt!! I updated my whozeewhatzit and now I can see the flamin’ weasel. Funny how that works.

 


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 19, 2008, 9:24 pm

That word could put an eye out, PnB! ๐Ÿ™‚

 


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: November 19, 2008, 10:31 pm

PBS is running a show on the Queen’s opening of Parliament. Pretty cool!

Gah, my laptop is dying. I’m gonna have to do something about it sooner than I wanted to.

 


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 20, 2008, 4:41 am

My ThinkPad fell over in the middle of all this, Enas. Dead hard drive. Happily, I had a spare Uncle B bought me for Christmas. Unhappily, all my Windows disks and everything were packed.

Finally, I figured…I’m already bleeding money out every orifice. Why not call one of those housecall guys to fix it? He came out to the house, whisked it away and brought it back loaded with illicit stuff. He personally owns a similar model, so he just mirrored his machine onto mine. Got the whole Adobe Creative suite (which he swears won’t phone home), the Microsoft Office suite, all his geek tools. He even set the IE homepage for the BBC’s Southeast news.

Cost a few hundred bucks, but in the middle of this shit-storm? Totally worth it.

 


Comment from Lemur King
Time: November 20, 2008, 8:58 pm

MOON PIES!

I wonder if anyone here remembers the game “Redneck Rampage” and how you could boost your health by eating Moon Pies, pork rinds, whisky, and beer. Oh, and the everlovin’ Goo-Goo Cluster (super power-up). Somewhere I found a can of “Whup-Ass” energy drink and heard tell of microwaveable pork rinds – like popcorn, only different.

Anyway that game forced me to hunt down Moon Pies and Goo-Goos. Moon Pies are a tad too sweet.

Sorry about the hemorrhage of money. Hope you’re normalizing as far as that goes.

Enas… let me know when it kicks it. We’ll have an e:wake for your ‘puter.

 


Comment from lauraw
Time: November 20, 2008, 11:43 pm

Happy travels, Weasel.

I don’t know if you’re a gardener or not. But while you’re in TN you might maybe think on picking up some vegetable seeds. You know, for things you love but may not be able to find in Jolly Olde, so you can grow your own there.

 


Comment from Joanna
Time: November 21, 2008, 1:59 am

Out of sheer perverse curiosity, is that *everything* everything packed, or just “everything”? ‘Cause the last time I moved, I seem to remember there was something about, you know, *underwear* and stupid stuff like that … ๐Ÿ˜›

 

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