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Round 52: Dog Days edition

Weaselwannabe takes a second dick with Helen Thomas. And not a single fuck was given that day. Those kinds of Dead Pools are the best.

Okay, ready? Here we go:

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing by my own fair hand. And not just any old drawing, but a drawing on super special elephant poo paper.


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:01 pm

Ian Paisley/Baron Bannside.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:01 pm

Francisco Jose Garzon de Amo

Comment from Hutch
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:02 pm

Valerie Harper. Again.

Comment from Fawn
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:02 pm

Wilko Johnson – Game of Thrones star, guitarist in band Dr. Feelgood.

Comment from Dustoffmom
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:04 pm

Sicking with a proven winner….Nancy Reagan. 😉

Comment from acat
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:05 pm

Wow, I’m early enough to pick a Castro or a Mandela or a … wait, less typing, more picking!

Nelson Mandela


Comment from Michael
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:05 pm

Rosalyn Carter

Comment from Montenegro
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:10 pm

Muhammad ALI once again!!

Comment from Janna
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:11 pm

Kirk Douglas….again.

Comment from RushBabe
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:13 pm

Al Sharpton. Have you seen him lately?!

Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:21 pm

George Soros

Comment from cheshirelion
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:31 pm

Former Speaker Jim Wright

Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:34 pm

Jimmah Carter

Comment from LarkBunting
Time: July 26, 2013, 6:44 pm

Fidel Castro

Comment from LesterIII
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:08 pm

Robert Mugabe.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:13 pm

Pete Seeger

Comment from GIL
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:20 pm

Henry Kissinger.

Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:21 pm

The easy pick would be Oceania. After all, he claims to have had a particularly virulent and resistant form of flesh eating bacteria for the last several months. A medical impossibility. So he is WAY overdue. But that may be against house rules.

So instead I will pick John Boehner, putative Republican Speaker of the House who always votes against his own caucus and with the Democrats. Of terminal dehydration from the public weeping he will do after he caves on Amnesty and Open Borders, the Debt Ceiling and the $1 Trillion tax increase Reid is demanding along with it, and his working to keep the caucus from trying to defund Obamacare and the domestic spying by the regime. It is hard work making Pierre Laval look like a hero.

Subotai Bahadur

Comment from StPatrick_TN
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:23 pm

Fred Phelps

Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:25 pm

This is a test. My last few posts have included mention of our regular Kiwi commenter. And my last few posts [including my dead pool pick] have gone into the spam filter. Just wondering if his name is a trigger like in the movie “Beetlejuice”.

Subotai Bahadur

Comment from Mojo
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:41 pm

Harry Reid, for the dick!

Comment from eirik
Time: July 26, 2013, 7:50 pm

Mickey Rooney

Comment from GIL
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:09 pm

Subtotal? That’s not a spam filter. That’s the koi filter for Juan Wms’ carp shit. It goes into the Ocean and the Trade Winds take it back to it’s mosquito pool. DDT is the only True Answer.

Comment from GIL
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:13 pm

from OceaniaToday: http://tinyurl.com/lzt9rxx

Comment from thefritz
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:14 pm

Hmmm, Gil poaches henry kissinger, (who I’ve picked for the last gazillion times…)I guess he gets the same Bilderberg intel I do…anyway, I’ll take anthony weiner just cuz the dick jokes are endless….

Comment from Bob
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:27 pm

Vera Lynn

Comment from Vince
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:28 pm

Billy Graham

Comment from gulliblepratt
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:39 pm

I know he’s dead. But Mandela’s family won’t admit it. That dick was mine. Mine I say.
So I will have to pick another zombie.
Z Z Gabor. been dead for years but she wont admit it Darrrrrrlink

Comment from armybrat
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:46 pm

desmond tutu

Comment from Thursby
Time: July 26, 2013, 8:53 pm

Chuck Berry

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:01 pm

gullibleprat, I agree w/ your point and plaint. I can only hope that the reason they’ve not declared is that he contracted a new disease with no cure and that Teh Won was in the hospital w/ his relatives while they were sneezing during the incubation period.

Comment from twolaneflash
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:03 pm

Barry Barack Dunham Soetoro Hussein Obama, aka President LastNameUnknown – Usurper, Manchurian president, Traitor, Murderer of Benghazi and Fast & Furious, President Trayvon Benjamin Martin, Junior, The Bastard of all bastards. Die, please, by any means necessary. I’ll even forego The Dick just to see it in my lifetime.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:11 pm

Jane (“maybe people won’t piss on my grave if I dress up like Nancy Reagan”) F’ing Fonda.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:33 pm

I’m going with Prince Phillip.

Comment from Paula Douglas
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:45 pm

Stephen Hawking. I was going to say Abe Vigoda, but he seems so nice.

Comment from dissent555
Time: July 26, 2013, 9:53 pm

Still with Joan Fontaine.

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: July 26, 2013, 10:15 pm

Okay then. _I’ll_ take Abe Vigoda. Here’s hoping that Fish sleeps with the fishes, so a dick can win a dick.

Comment from ben
Time: July 26, 2013, 10:38 pm

William Shatner

Comment from Nanny 1
Time: July 26, 2013, 10:43 pm

George H W Bush, only that he’s getting up there and looking frail.

Comment from Stina
Time: July 26, 2013, 10:45 pm

The recently un-spliced Michael Moore.

Comment from Dan
Time: July 26, 2013, 10:55 pm

Chris Christie, from a snapped lap-band.

Comment from currently
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:06 pm

Willie Nelson

Comment from m
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:08 pm

eli wallach

Comment from Spunkus
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:10 pm

Bob Dole

Comment from Lazlo
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:17 pm

Barak Hussein Obama

Comment from cobrakai99
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:21 pm

Hillary Clinton knows too much.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:24 pm

Time to commit Blasphemy.


Comment from RealMc
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:37 pm

Clint Eastwood, punk.

But I’d GLADLY and Happily lose to twolaneflash.

God Willing!!

Comment from xul
Time: July 26, 2013, 11:44 pm

Ah hell, I’ll go with Christopher Lee again.

Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: July 27, 2013, 12:12 am

And I’ll go with Stan Lee again (creator of Marvel Comics, and no relation to xul’s pick!) 🙂

Comment from Nina
Time: July 27, 2013, 12:14 am

I was organizing my garage and missed 6 PM WBT. Hmmmpf.

Now I have to think.

But my garage looks much better. I hate moving!

Comment from Bill the Butcher
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:06 am

Olivia de Havilland!

“She’s namin’ that Indian baby after ME!”

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:11 am

I’m going to sit this one out, but I do have a commission for you.

Comment from Spad13
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:13 am

Jimmy Carter

Comment from Spad13
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:16 am

Damn I missed Skeptic’s pick.

George Zimmerman. The freaks ain’t gonna let it go.

Comment from Pablo
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:17 am

Mikhail Kalashnikov

Comment from PatAZ
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:55 am

Looks like Twolaneflash beat you, Lazlo. And I pick Jesse Ventura, because he is a dick.

Comment from EZnSF
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:58 am

Hugh Hefner

Comment from HowardDevore
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:11 am

Bashar Assad.. .because in the end the world wont miss him

Comment from Laughing Buddha
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:11 am

Been a while, can’t believe he’s still alive. But Ronnie Biggs.

Comment from Sockless Joe
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:13 am

Rob Reiner

Comment from JeffS
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:52 am

Bette Middler. After being assaulted by an outraged ghost of a US GI killed in WWII, using an American history book. Because that would be justice.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: July 27, 2013, 3:28 am

I’ve been relying on old age, and it hasn’t worked. Let’s try military power again. So…

Joseph Kony – because even teh One kills some people who need killing, Kony is eminently qualified, and he wants some good news. (Our people in Uganda are only “advisers”, but they’re fully armed.)

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: July 27, 2013, 3:31 am

Nanny 1 Time: July 26, 2013, 10:43 pm George H W Bush, only that he’s getting up there and looking frail.

Maybe you saw him with no hair. That was on purpose, to show solidarity with the two-year-old son of a Secret Service escort who is fighting leukemia.

Comment from Tibby
Time: July 27, 2013, 4:04 am

Mary Tyler Moore

Comment from Capt. Kranky
Time: July 27, 2013, 4:46 am

I believe that my best bet might be Mickey Rooney, probably because I just found out he is still alive. I thought he died years ago.

Comment from P2
Time: July 27, 2013, 6:24 am

John mccain

Comment from Gromulin
Time: July 27, 2013, 1:08 pm

Krep…New job, and in the middle of selling the house and moving the fambly (to a beach town, even!)means I’m late for the dead pool…so the old standby: Antoine “Fats” Domino.

Comment from smedleythebarbarian
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:21 pm

Betty White
She can only make so many jokes about how old she is

Comment from Yojimbo
Time: July 27, 2013, 2:28 pm

Her valley is not so green these days:

Maureen O’Hara

Comment from East Asia
Time: July 27, 2013, 4:12 pm

Marco Rubio.
Yeah, he’s young, and has premiere senatorial healthcare. I haven’t a chance. I just like to think about it.

Comment from East Asia
Time: July 27, 2013, 4:15 pm

My first vote sticks?? Please, PLEASE, Madame Stoatwise, lemme change to Paul Ryan—!

“Makes [vote on citizenship] announcement at ‘bilingual listening session’…”

Comment from mm
Time: July 27, 2013, 7:54 pm

Ding! Dong!

Comment from J.S.Bridges
Time: July 27, 2013, 9:23 pm

Well, since SomeVeg beat out my late-arriving butt once again for Li’l Red Janey Da Hood (way to go, bro – keep it up with them negative vibes, and we’ll see the early demise of Henry’s Biggest Mistake yet!!), I’ll go with that Grrreat Anti-Amurrican, all-around raaacist putz, liar-by-disremembrance and South Of The Border gunrunner-in-chief, Eric “The Rotten” Holder – preferably by slow-but-terminal food poisoning, from a tainted burrito Supreme obtained at a bootleg mobile taqueria operated by “undocumented” wetbacks. Simple justice, simply served…

Die, Obamanation dogsbody, die!!

Comment from ama
Time: July 27, 2013, 11:01 pm

SCJ Ginsberg

Comment from jc
Time: July 28, 2013, 12:10 am

Elmore Leonard, in Detroit, with a typewriter.

Comment from Davem123
Time: July 28, 2013, 4:07 am

Busy yesterday, completely forgot the Dead Pool. Embarassing, no doubt a sign of encroaching mental decrepitude.
I’m going for Tony Blair, who deserves it for helping arrange the early release of the Lockerbie bomber. May he fall from 10,000 feet from a disintegrating aircraft, watching the Earth rushing toward him.

Comment from unkawill
Time: July 28, 2013, 6:01 am

Dick Van Dyke

Comment from Oceania
Time: July 28, 2013, 8:40 am

The USA.
Dead on Arrival!

Comment from Sockless Joe
Time: July 28, 2013, 6:28 pm

Teresa Heinz (Kerry).

Comment from Veeshir
Time: July 28, 2013, 7:34 pm

Well, I guess I get Ed Asner again.

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: July 28, 2013, 8:24 pm

Nancy “The Hairy One” Pelosi, of whatever causes agony and is incurable or even imperious to pain medication. Kick off, already!

Comment from mojo
Time: July 28, 2013, 10:01 pm

OT: Place names


Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: July 29, 2013, 2:01 am

Mentalfloss: posting retarded shit that was on slashdot nearly 15 years ago.

Comment from Malcolm Kirkpatrick
Time: July 29, 2013, 2:31 am

Since I may not pick Maggie the chicken, I would pick Lucy the Great Dane, who is tied to my living room floor because she keeps pulling her sutures (8 iterations and counting). She’s locally famous, her lawyer asserts. I expect that’s not famous enough. Ayman Zawahiri, then.

Comment from weaselwannabe
Time: July 29, 2013, 2:55 am

Tony Bennett

Comment from naleta
Time: July 29, 2013, 5:27 am

I’m late to the party again, but I still get to pick Larry King!

Comment from Oceania
Time: July 29, 2013, 12:07 pm

Maybe someone will torture and execute Holder?

Comment from mojo
Time: July 29, 2013, 9:45 pm

Careful, Stark – we retards are horrendously strong. Like chimps.

Comment from Rodent
Time: July 30, 2013, 12:55 am

Sticking with Chris Matthews.
Because when you have worms eating your brain, sooner or later you run out of brain.

Comment from BJM
Time: July 30, 2013, 5:29 am

Yikes…totes forgot and lost out on Phil the Greek this round.

I’ll take Bieber…the kid is on a downward spiral to a bad end.

Comment from sandman with extra vitriol
Time: July 30, 2013, 10:53 am

I’ll take Bob VILA.

Comment from steve
Time: July 30, 2013, 2:45 pm

Erich Priebke

Comment from acat
Time: July 30, 2013, 7:01 pm

Comment from Oceania
Time: July 29, 2013, 12:07 pm
Maybe someone will torture and execute Holder?

You say that like .. wait, nevermind. (waves at the nice NSA person)


Comment from LesterIII
Time: July 30, 2013, 7:47 pm

No poopie-backdropped dickless reward for Eileen Brennan’s jump from the mortal coil…

Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: July 31, 2013, 1:28 am

Stoaty, this particular Dead Pool post isn’t coming up when you click on the Dead Pool picture in the sidebar; missing tag?

Anyway, meant to post this death announcement here:

Former U.S. Sen. Harry F. Byrd Jr. Dies

Comment from platypuss
Time: July 31, 2013, 11:40 am

Amanda Bynes

Comment from Mr. Compton
Time: July 31, 2013, 5:49 pm

David Cassidy (in a DUI car wreck)

Comment from Mr. Dave
Time: August 1, 2013, 1:01 am

Ramsey Clark

Comment from RealMc
Time: August 1, 2013, 12:52 pm

“Comment from P2
Time: July 27, 2013, 6:24 am

John mccain”

you key board to his slip and fall off a cliff.

Hitlary mccain, really?!?!

Comment from David Gillies
Time: August 2, 2013, 3:57 am

Late, late, late because I just got a brand new Mac and I’ve been too busy playing with it to remember Dead Pools. Gordon Brown, of course.

Comment from acat
Time: August 3, 2013, 12:24 am

Hey Boss Lady?

This round isn’t showing up out of the link on the right sidebar.

Is something broke?


Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: August 3, 2013, 2:34 pm

Michael Ansara dead at 91 – played Kang (a Klingon) in Star Trek.

I think I’ll go watch the “Day of the Dove” episode again…

Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: August 6, 2013, 7:34 pm

Stoaty needs to add the “deadpool” tag to this post to make it show up in the sidebar link.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: August 6, 2013, 10:23 pm

You’re quite right, Stephen. Fixed. Thanks for pointing it out.

Comment from LesterIII
Time: August 8, 2013, 10:04 pm

…and there goes Karen Black. Dog Days indeed.

Comment from mandel bread
Time: August 12, 2013, 2:33 pm

Al Molinaro

Comment from Michael
Time: August 12, 2013, 5:10 pm

Eydie Gorme has passed at 84 years old.


Comment from acat
Time: August 15, 2013, 3:05 pm

Wait .. Eydie Gorme was still alive? What?


Comment from Hutch
Time: August 15, 2013, 7:46 pm

Lisa Robin Kelly just died in rehab at the age of 43. Look out, Lindsey Lohan & Amanda Bynes – you’re next.

Comment from Nora
Time: August 15, 2013, 10:51 pm

Gwynneth Paltrow for the love of God

Comment from Doug in Maine
Time: August 17, 2013, 6:56 pm

John Conyers, Democrat of Michigan, founder of the Congressional Black Caucus. Ain’t Wikipedia grand?

Comment from Chi-Town Jerry
Time: August 18, 2013, 2:52 pm

Peter O’Toole

For no other reason than he’s really really old..

Comment from Davem123
Time: August 20, 2013, 11:16 am

Close one, unkawill:

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: August 20, 2013, 2:18 pm

It appears jc has taken the dead pool w/ Elmore Leonard

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: August 23, 2013, 3:46 am

Lindsey Lohan is out of rehab. Again.

Comment from Jeff Weimer
Time: October 31, 2013, 5:03 pm

David Dinkins, former Mayor of New York. Good and Hard.

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