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Itch: scratched

Ahhhhh…a little higher…a little to the right. Ohhhhhh, yesssssss…that’s the spot!

Our little rootin’ tootin’ moose-shootin’ five-foot-nothing hockeymom beautyqueen done real good, didn’t she?

Okay, here’s what I don’t get. The moment I heard Sarah Palin was the nominee last week, I did what every self-respecting card-carrying noun-hyphen-adverb does in 2008 — I ran right to Google and plugged her in. I read up on her, old and new. Pro and con. Then I did a Google Images search and gave her the hairy eyeball. I wanted to hear her speak, so I watched footage of a debate performance in the Alaska gubenatorial race. I spent maybe an hour at it, and then I pretty much made up my mind.

So when I watched the repeat of her speech on C-SPAN this morning, it was exactly what I expected. I’m not being self-congratulatory. I don’t send my dad a Father’s Day card without Googling to make sure I spell his name right and I assume everyone who works with words and images does the same.

So how the hell could our mainstream media be caught so flat-footed by her performance? We know they read D-KOS, because they helped spread that stupid lying trash about Trig Palin. So, like, we know they have computers with internet. How could they POSSIBLY not read a little news while they’re at it? (You know what this means: other than the echo chamber of the op/ed pages, they don’t consume their own product. No wonder it’s such shite).

Seriously, how come nobody in the fucking media spent ten fucking minutes in the last fucking week doing their fucking jobs? See, it’s not just about bias. We also hate you because you’re HUGELY AND GIGANTICALLY INCOMPETENT. You SUCK. God. You’re too lazy and stupid to be decent partisan hacks, never mind proper journalists.

Well, thank Christ for that, I guess.


Comment from Princess Bernie
Time: September 4, 2008, 8:56 am

There are a lot of lazy journalists out there. They prefer to be spoon fed what to think and say rather than doing their own research. Happens at all levels.

Comment from porknbean
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:05 am

I’m sure they did look her up. They just do not want the sheep, who don’t google, to know about her. How many mainstream outlets carried her speech or the most important bits about how what is in the fine print of Obamalama-ding-dongs platform? I bet not many.

Compare the ‘US’ magazine covers/content on the ding-dong to the one on Palin. Megan Kelly rips the dude from US weekly a new one over that but the damage was done. I.e. – Inside they mention Todd’s DUI but didn’t mention it was 22 years ago.

It is a coordinated, all out assault.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:20 am

Man oh man…when Piper licked her hand and smoothed down Trig’s hair, I ’bout died of cute poisoning.

Comment from benning
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:26 am


Dead on, Weasel! 🙂

Comment from Gnus
Time: September 4, 2008, 10:02 am

A star is born.

Comment from Cuffy Meigs
Time: September 4, 2008, 10:12 am

Right on, weaz. Ace also nailed the oblivious libs to the wall on this.

Comment from apotheosis
Time: September 4, 2008, 10:35 am

Oblivious liberals. Oblibberals!

I must admit I didn’t do nearly as much background as you did on her. I get the distinct impression that I was far more nervous about her speech than she was.

No matter how this election turns out, 2012 will be the year to watch…Sarah vs Hillary is going to be awesome.

Comment from Arkhanos
Time: September 4, 2008, 11:14 am

Hearing the MSM blame Palin for their coverage of her daughters made me twitch.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 11:26 am

Oh, that’s precious, Arkhanos. “How dare she subject her children to…umm…us and our unprofessional behavior?”

I would like to thank the US media for doing such a grand job this last week of lowering expectations by portraying Governor Palin – whoops, I mean Hick-Burg Mayor Palin – as a hillbilly know-nothing permapregnant ditz, half of whose 27 kids are the spawn of a stump-toothed uncle who hasn’t worked since he was an extra in Deliverance.

How’s that narrative holding up, geniuses? Almost as good as your “devoted husband John Edwards” routine?

I trust even now Maureen Dowd is working on a hilarious new column mocking proposed names for the Governor’s first grandchild. Perhaps Richard Cohen can just take the week off and they can rerun his insightful analysis comparing the Palin nomination to Caligula making his horse a consul. Whereas we sophisticates all know that if McCain were as smart as Obama he’d have nominated a dead horse to be his consul. No wait…

Steyn on the Corner.

Comment from Matt
Time: September 4, 2008, 11:51 am

You nailed it Weasel on calling them lazy, I’ve had the chance to do some journalism and if those guys and gals in the msm are like the sports journalists I worked with, then they probably just cut and paste quotes given to them in press releases. We got typed, pre-packaged quotes from the team before we left the arena. Imagine what they get from the canidates.

My editors wouldn’t let me use them normally — but when the quote fits the approved narrative of the msm I can totally hear them thinking “I could cut and paste or I could go find a way to get an interview, think up questions, interview the person and type up what they say…. I think I’ll cut and paste.”

Comment from Matt
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:01 pm

Oh and one more thing, we need a better more fitting way to call her speech a success — something more hunter or hockey than ‘Home Run’. Something like

Sarah Palin — She shoots, she scores!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:10 pm

Yeah, what’s the famous statistic that they always cite? The one about how much lower an opinion people have of journalists if they have recently been the subject of a story?

Hm. Let’s see. I’m completely sports-deaf and I guess I’m not rural enough to know what the hunting equivalent of a home run is. A through-and-through lung shot? One in the eye socket?

Heh. She barked their squirrel! You know the expression? Old-fashioned muzzle loaders were just too blunt an instrument for something as small as a squirrel; a direct hit tears ’em to pieces. So the thing to do is aim at the tree — the bark — next to their fuzzy little heads and let the flying splinters do the job. Barking a squirrel.

Comment from Matt
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:21 pm

I like ‘barked their squirrel’ it has a nice back-woodsy flavor to it.

It is interesting what gets journalists off their buts though. I’m working with a domestic violence survivor and as the woman is recovering from two gun shot wounds the hospital caught two reporters trying to sneak onto her floor. The newspapers then called a relative on the other side of the country, who knew nothing by the way,to comment on the situation.

Comment from Gibby Haynes
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:30 pm

It was a great speech intercut with charming little-girl-and-baby shenanigans. Personally I preferred Giuliani’s, but maybe that’s just because I have a powerful respect for that man. I read somewhere that Palin’s teleprompter went on the fritz and she had to do the speech from memory. That’s impressive in and of itself. Especially when you consider the last time that happened to Obama, he was reduced to a stuttering, mumbling wreck.

Also, apparently a couple of Code Pink nuts tried to get on the stage but were dragged away by their small-minded heads by Secret Service. Part of me is glad they didn’t interrupt, but part of me is interested to see how she, Palin, would’ve handled it.

Comment from Allen
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:30 pm

I like, she clubbed their seal. I spent one winter in Alaska, Fort Greeley. Cold, brrrrrr. I did the Army’s Arctic Survival thingy up there, had to live in a snow cave for a week. See, she’s even got me thinking postive about that.

We got her, they get Biden. Hey, here’s some change for ya, an old retread and a tire gauge.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:36 pm

Heh! Clubbed their seal!

I had the same thought, Gibby. I kinda sorta would’ve liked to see her deal with a protester. Particularly since the one that almost made it up there wasn’t just a Code Pinko, she was a high-level Obama fundraiser. Did she not realize the implications if she’d made it? Disaster for her side!

Apparently, the teleprompter guy didn’t pause for the applause lines. So the prompter got ahead of her (it happened to Giuliani, too). That’s got to be harder than having no teleprompter at all. I have X-treme stage fright; just thinking about that makes sweat prickle along my hairline.

Comment from Matt
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:39 pm

How long until we hear that the telepromter thing was really her fault: she said too many things that made people applaud — that shows poor planning skills and lack of experience.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 12:58 pm

Heh. One of those tools on Politico is now saying he could see the teleprompter the whole time, and it was fine.

I must say, reading the lefty comments is fun today. Fun, and delicious. Like Scott Tenorman’s tears.

Comment from Allen
Time: September 4, 2008, 1:17 pm

What I thought was really cool about last night was watching the family. They pass that baby around with total confidence. Whole lot of love in that family. Yes, we are bitterly clinging to our baby

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 4, 2008, 1:39 pm

I’m looking forward to seeing a large family in the White House.

Should give Americans some pride or comfort in having large families. This pride in families, which is being eroded, is a beautiful thing indeed. And Steyn has been harping on that for a long time. Smart man: we should listen to him. He’s funny too.

Electing Palin to the White House, even as Vice President, will be a true triumph of family values. Family and their values revolve around love and support and care and concern. It’s all about the others.

Comment from Dawn
Time: September 4, 2008, 2:08 pm

Oh Musli, you are such a Mormon! (*wink)

My favorite part of her speech was about the styrofoam colonnades. That made me cringe for Obama. He had to feel that one. Oh SNAP!

Comment from Jill
Time: September 4, 2008, 2:09 pm

I’m suffering a turr’ble headache today and as such am a little foggier than normal…MSM?
I can’t figure that one out.


Comment from Dawn
Time: September 4, 2008, 2:11 pm

MSM = Main Stream Media

Comment from Jill
Time: September 4, 2008, 2:32 pm


(thanks, Dawn!)

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 2:40 pm

Ohhhh…I love this. From CNN:

To Rob Crawford of Washington, D.C., Palin appeared “condescending and elitist” during her acceptance speech.

Honest, leftists are like aliens trying to work out how to persuade earthlings to buy something by watching our earthling television and imitating our earthling behavior as best they can. So, they finally worked out that people don’t like it when Obama is condescending and elitist. So, of course! The thing to do is accuse Sarah Palin of being condescending and elitist! All fixed.

Jesus. People who absolutely freaking hated her speech couldn’t honestly call it elitist. Corn pone populism, yes. But that is the opposite of elitist.

Comment from Lemur King
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:19 pm

I think the MSM was caught off-guard. They were so caught up in the frenzy of their autoerotic asphyxiation over the big O that they only took the time to attack the obvious things, which happened to be totally inconsequential and/or truly off-limits in a society made up of civilized adults.

I know I sound like a broken record ’cause it’s already been said but you don’t go attacking a person’s family just because you don’t like that person. Especially kids.

I think she was nothing short of amazing. The hockey-mom/pitbull/lipstick joke will be with me for a very long time. That and her reference to being proud of her country all the time.

Palin elitist? Pot, kettle… black. And the kettle ain’t all that much.

You gonna add a little scratch-brush to that pail, weas? To get the lil’ weasel’s itches…

Comment from jwpaine
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:33 pm

I like how virtually every commentator (Britt Hume included) noted that Sarahcudda’s speech was written for her. Like that never happens. Ever.

In the meantime, I was ambivalent about McCain (I merely wanted Obamessiah to lose), but now I rilly rilly rilly want McCain to win, just so’s my favorite hicksburg mayor permapregnant cocktail waitress ditz will become VPILF of The Free World. For starters.

…and Slick Willy thought he knew what to do with a cocktail waitress.

Comment from Allen
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:34 pm

That’s a perfect analogy weasel. They get the latest download from the mothership, go around spouting it, then wondering why it’s not working. Meanwhile us mortals here on earth are laughing and pointing, they then in turn request a new update from the mothership…

Now what are they doing? They appear to be rolling around on the ground, laughing. Request update.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:40 pm

Ack-ack! Ack-ack-ack!

Ack! Ack-ack!

/where’s Slim Whitman when you need him?

Comment from Conservative Belle
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:42 pm

For a moment there, I thought you were holding back how you really felt. The media is incompetent.

And I think if the Obamessiah told them to stand in the corner on their heads and gargle peanut butter, they’d do it and then claim it was a vast right wing conspiracy when they looked like fools.

Comment from jwpaine
Time: September 4, 2008, 3:44 pm

Like they need any help with that, CB.

Comment from Jill
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:15 pm


Ew ew ewwww!

I just peeked a look-see over at D-KOS.
Now I know whence to get my manure for next year’s veggie garden.

Comment from Michael
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:19 pm

I think Weasel’s post was condescending and elitist.

Comment from Arkhanos
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:20 pm

Watching political coverage through these news stations is kinda like watching a hockey game through that new ‘protective netting’ in front of the audience. They say you tune it out eventually.

As someone who grew up in a rural/hunting/farming community, regarding last nights convention, I gotta say:
-Romney cleaned the gun, Huckabee assembled it, and Giuliani loaded it…but it was Sarah Palin who emptied my hot steaming magazine all over the frekin’ auditorium.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:26 pm

That was a really condescending, elitist observation, Michael. And that’s all we want to hear about your hot, steaming magazine over there, Arkhanos.

Comment from Arkhanos
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:34 pm

I admit it was mostly condescending 🙁

Comment from jwpaine
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:47 pm

somebody needs a wet-nap.

Comment from Lemur King
Time: September 4, 2008, 4:58 pm


Thanks y’all for good afternoon chortle.

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 4, 2008, 6:16 pm

Palin is guilty of lèse majesté!

I think the Leftists are unused to strong women…strong women opposing them, that is. Strong women are supposed to kowtow to their every diktat.

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 4, 2008, 6:29 pm

That’s confusing, according to who you talk to, Obama is the messiah, the antichrist, or royalty. Who to believe? Well, I guess Muslihoon is closest, so for now… yes, she has damaged the crown.

I can’t wait for some debates.

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 4, 2008, 6:37 pm

Obama, the Prince of Darkness, is the Antichrist.

So, both: royalty and a false messiah.

Funny thing I noticed this morning: On an anti-Palin pro-Obama Christian blog, the blogger was bringing up stuff about questionable things her church had said. Interestingly, fellow pro-Obamanites told him to shut up: bringing this up against Palin will backfire and hurt Obama.

Comment from Muslihoon
Time: September 4, 2008, 6:40 pm

Apropos to nothing, courtesy of Noreen of Emerald Bile:

Butterflies are what they are – large flapping things which may or may not be colourful, used as a tribal recognition device by the innocent, ugly or unloved.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:10 pm

Oh, Musli. You’ve made the Butterfly God very sad 🙁

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:30 pm

Or angry.

Can you just imagine an angry, vengeful, cruel Butterfly God?

Oh the humanity!

Or should I say “Oh the lepidopterae!” ?

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:48 pm

Lemur: I thought they called it MOTHRA…….

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:48 pm


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:52 pm

Oh! Mosura was the first film I remember seeing in the theater. Drive-in. I was four or five. The tiny Japanese girls in the gilded coach…

…never forget it…

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 4, 2008, 7:54 pm

I thought Godzilla gooshed Mothra on the windshield of his SUV.

If he didn’t, he should have.

Now I gotta go listen to Blue Oyster Cult – Godzilla rocks.

There’s your next assignment Weas. How to show a ravening vengeful Butterfly God. With lots of gore.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: September 4, 2008, 8:37 pm

Lemur, you apparently haven’t watched the more recent films. Mothra came back with a vengance, then flew off into space to save earth from something-or-other……

http ://www.monitos.cl/foto/pics/_godzilla-mothra.jpg

Comment from Allen
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:20 pm

Ok, I’ll admit it, I have every Godzirra flick on DVD. I can’t believe I copped to that. What was that “slug” creature called, I can’t remember.

Hey, I hiked up Mt. Fuji a couple of times. One time I was glissading down one of the cinder tracks when I hear, “Banzaaaaai!” Guy comes flying by riding a cafeteria tray with handles. Lummee some crazy Japanese stuff.

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:33 pm

Scubafreak, I’m old, married, with children. And I’m a engineer/geek. I know, what a huge mass of contradictions. Well, perhaps not all that old. 40.08 years. I’ve also apparently let you down, nay… failed… in that I… haven’t kept up with Godzilla. I became a harder-core SciFi nut after Blade Runner and never looked back except for Troma and other odd movies of it’s ilk. (hangs head in shame) At least Allen has his shite together.

Allen, how did you come to spend enough time to climb Fuji multiple times? I love the culture, the food, the geography. Someday I do want to go there. Cafeteria tray? Hmmm, that sounds fun. I skateboarded down stairs once. Course every last one of us were drunk as lords so nobody got too badly hurt.

Comment from Allen
Time: September 4, 2008, 9:43 pm

LK, my mom and dad lived in Tokyo in the mid eighties. I went over a couple of times while I was in college, summer break stuff. I loved the crazy. They lived within walking distance of Roppongi (serious revelry was available.)

Singing country western karaoke, in Tokyo, drunk as a lord, si. I think it’s impossible to get embarrassed in Japan while drunk. Craziness is expected.

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 4, 2008, 10:12 pm

Very cool, Allen. I am sorry you aren’t (apparently) blogging because I bet you have some amazing pictures.

Classical Japanese culture is pretty rigid, and I imagine drunk/crazy is the only place to let the pressure squirt out. I’ll never understand Karaoke though. Maybe I just never got ripped enough. Although, after a four-day bender at a party my sister threw, that would be hard to picture.

Comment from wendyworn
Time: September 5, 2008, 12:23 am

I’m sorry, did you say anti-Palin, pro-Obama Christian blog? Oxy-moron anyone?

Comment from LemurKing
Time: September 5, 2008, 12:34 am

Now that you mention it, it does sound rather odd.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 5, 2008, 4:22 am

My favorite is Godzilla versus the Smog Monster. Mostly because, instead of fading the music track in and out, in the English version they just start it and stop it abruptly. It’s wonderfully brain-hurty.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: September 5, 2008, 8:15 am

Well, whaddya know! My spam brings teh funny:

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette and continued smoking.

Lady 1: What’s that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn’t get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day … Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy looks at her kind of strangely (she is, after all, over 80 years of age), but politely asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: It doesn’t matter as long as it fits a Camel.

After that, it linked to a bunch of ‘cheap cigarettes online’ sites. I almost let it go through. It sang for its supper, after all.

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