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I have sat the ass right out of my jeans

I bent over to pick up a chicken yesterday (as you do) and felt the backside of my jeans vanish. Not merely rip at the seam, but…well, look at it. Have you ever seen denim run like pantyhose? Extraordinary.

I bought two pairs of jeans from the nice Pakistani man at the local market just before lockdown and I’ve worn one while the other was in the laundry every day since. Pakistani denim, I guess. Huh.

I think I have been sitting too much.

Today, they announced the furlough scheme is extended until September. I don’t know if that means I won’t be allowed to work until then, but I will seriously climb a tree and throw nuts at people if they try to keep me locked up another six months.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 3, 2021, 5:54 pm

Uncle B and I sit in two adjacent rooms most of the day. We can easily converse, but we can’t quite see each other. We’d been reading in silence for some time, when he pipes up and says, with some heat, “the Flintstones can’t possibly be ‘a page right out of history’. That’s the whole point!”

Another hour’s silence ensues and he says, “do you like scissors?”

Stupidest remake of The Shining ever.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: March 3, 2021, 6:19 pm

Meanwhile in Texas….

Gov. Greg Abbott says he’s rescinding statewide mask mandate and capacity limits on businesses


Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: March 3, 2021, 7:42 pm

Oh, deer…


Comment from durnedyankee
Time: March 3, 2021, 9:26 pm

@Some Veg – which President Joe Dementor says is “Neanderthal thinking”.

I’ll take it over Dementia thinking, thanks.

As the numbers continue to prove what a bunch of hysterical sissynancy drama queens they’ve all been.

I didn’t vote for the man, and you know, as the Democrats whined for 4 years, that means he’s not my President.

Comment from BJM
Time: March 4, 2021, 4:09 pm

@Stoaty Why yes, yes I have. Years ago while we were moving house. Needless to say, it was a grueling, gaffe-filled day and we were exhausted by the end.

The Spousal Unit was wearing his fav old soft Levi cords and after we unloaded the last box from the moving van he stepped down from the deck of the van. RRIIIIPPPPP!!! The Levi’s inseam ripped from boot top to boot top. The look on his face was priceless. I have never laughed so hard. His glare only made it funnier. Forty years later it still makes me laugh to tears and he still doesn’t find it amusing.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: March 4, 2021, 4:27 pm

Oh, cords were famous for that! The nubbly fabric would go smooth at the thighs, where it rubbed like sandpaper. Then one day…poof!

Comment from Jon
Time: March 4, 2021, 5:42 pm

I feel like the central planners have all decided September is when it will “back to work”, since that is the current plan from my employer in the US.

Have to get the taxes generator working again so that the State can be fed, I suppose.
It will be that way until the Marxists overplay their hand, at which point some bad things will likely occur. Arc of history and all that.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: March 4, 2021, 6:54 pm

In another timeline, I work for Levi Strauss. I sewed the seat seam, attaching the two backs of the legs with the yokes already sewn on—running a seam from the top of the yokes to the crotch or “stride.” All Levis have allowances—they were called tolerances—on seams. Up to 1/2″ on the flat-feld seams. Sometimes, seams barely catch the edges of the fabric into that flat-feld seam, and the constant stress on those seams eventually give way and shred. It’s a crap shoot—you have no way of knowing how much fabric is folded into the seam. But constant stress will stress will shred a good seam, too.

My nephew is 5’7″ and climbs in/out of a pickup all day because he supervises a highway construction company. That long step in and out of the his 4WD pickup just destroys his jeans, and he finally went to a brand that has a diamond-shaped gusset in the crotch which relieves the strain on the fabric.

I’m sure is more than you wanted to know. My apologies 🙂

Comment from thefritz
Time: March 4, 2021, 7:42 pm

@deborah HH

…a more delightful statement has never been uttered…”a diamond-shaped gusset in the crotch”

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