sweasel.com

Happy Birthday, Stoaty.

Very good. We have scanned your fingerprints in off of the picture. They are consistent with all our other information.

Thank You,
Big Brother

Heh. I used my fingerprints so often over the years as a design element in illustration, they’re better known than my face.

You yelled at the radio while brushing your teeth? That conjures up a compellingly horrifying image!

Oh, yeah–many happy returns and onto that.

Oh, you can yell around an electric toothbrush. You don’t have to do much but stand there like a banana and hold it in place.

Aw, that’s cute.

Your cuticles look like they’re about as well-cared for as mine 😉

*puts mani-pedi on the to-do list*

It took the licensing bureau for Insurance all of 45 minutes to get my fingerprints to “take”. I figure my retirement plan can easily involve bare-handed theft.

The impertinent finger-print-taker-dude informed me that I have flattened prints cuz I’m so old. I informed him they got that way from slapping insolent yutes. (More likely it’s from all the printing press solvents. Benzene. It does a body good.)

Many happy returns of the day, Stoatie! And that shiny little weasel is the most cutest thing evah! Uncle B, ya done good.

Bad link on that shopping site, Stoatie.

Deep down, I hate politics.

I know a couple of people who love politics, and live to follow live coverage of political conventions, and they scare the crap out of me. Not them (they are on the whole charming people, and friends) but what they represent: the political junkies, for whom politics is important in and of itself, not because it affects our lives but because it can give you a high like crack cocaine. My beau ideal as far as politicians go is Cincinnatus. And we haven’t had a whole lot like him in this nation.

[Ah! electric toothbrush? ‘k, I guess that makes sense. . .less likely to fling toothpaste about the bathroom. ]

What a nice birthday gift, Stoaty!

Well done, Uncle B!

Hmm, nice silver Stoat there, Stoatie. Should give good protection from Werewolves, but not so much from Zombies.

The jury is out on Vampires…. 😉

Verra, verra, nice present! Badgers aren’t generally held up as an example of refined and genteel sensibilities, which I’m sure is solely due to the elitism gene dominant in the thoroughly-inbred fashion industry.

Wonder if Mrs. Compton will comment on the overly-large piercing…

BTW, six Fed’rul Agencies and eight foreign gummints have my prints on file. I can’t misbehave anywhere in the Northern Hemisphere…

“Deep down, I hate politics.”

Don’t we all?

The only thing that old fraud Marx ever got right was that the state needed to wither away.

If anyone ever invents a form of government that can protect my rights (Life, Self Defense, Property, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness, along with their derivatives, just in case anyone is curious) with minimal input from me, say, an election every five years or so, I would be ALL ears, let me tell you!

Many happy returns! 😉

Where ya gonna hang it from, Mz Weazie? 🙂

Just for you Bill!

Happy Birthday, Ms. Weasel!

BTW, six Fed’rul Agencies and eight foreign gummints have my prints on file. I can’t misbehave anywhere in the Northern Hemisphere…

Use gloves?

“ShitWithWeaselsOnIt.com”

Heh.

Hmmm, I looked for Stuff With Weasels On it and found a good one, a stuffed weasel hand puppet.

Now who doesn’t want one of those?

Happy belated Dame Stoat.

What a darling little weasel—I wonder if there is a tiny little badger to match? (Good present, Uncle Badger) And what a great photograph too.

I’m a little late to the party.

Happy Birfday.

(did you save me a piece of cake?)