You bet I am
This one is obvious, though you probably can’t see the row of knitted poppies in various colors across the top. Guerilla knitting on public furniture is a thing here now.
Uncle B said, you aren’t going to inflict a whole week of public benches on your readers, are you?
And I said, this blog turns 18 this year. I have done a total of 5,101 posts, not including this one. I’ve probably told all my family stories twice. If I’ve got five pictures of benches, yes I by-god am going to have a week of benchposting.
Two more to go. Enjoy!
October 8, 2025 — 4:28 pm
Comments: 5
Is this a tradition now?
As you probably guessed from yesterday’s guest bench, we were in a place called Littlestone in Kent. This is pretty far outside our territory and we haven’t been here in years, but I’m going stir crazy at home.
I’m not taking retirement well.
A number of the coastal benches – but not all! – were decorated like this. I thought it probably had to do with a significant anniversary of the person the bench is dedicated to, but a number of them all at once? They all looked pretty fresh.
Counterproductive. Who would dare sit on a memorial bench covered in flowers and toys?
October 7, 2025 — 5:25 pm
Comments: 4
Look! It’s a cement sofa!
I hope you mentally pronounced that see-mint, just like on the Beverly Hillbillies.
The plaque reads:
On this site stood the Littlestone Lifeboat Station
Erected in 1871 to the memory of
John Hatton, M.D.
Demolished in 1940 under military defense orders
This freehold was presented
to the Kent Rivers Catchment Board
by Major M. Teichman Derville, O.B.E., D.L., J.P.
Bailiff of Romney March
MCMXLIX
The things the military did to this area during the war – oof!
When I lived in Providence, I used to cut through a cemetery with some interesting grave markers. One in particular featured a pink poofy granite sofa across from a pink poofy granite armchair and, right where the television would be in this livingroom suite, the tombstone.
It’s like he thought his loved ones were going to come watch him like the Late Show.
October 6, 2025 — 4:12 pm
Comments: 5
Home sweet home
It’s for sale. I think what this means is there are eight cottages and the one farthest to the right is the one on the market. But it gave me a chuckle.
Have a good weekend, everyone!
p.s. The new Archbishop of Canterbury is a chick!
October 3, 2025 — 4:00 pm
Comments: 9
Chickens is weird, man
Down to my last two – this boy, Sam, and the last of the of the polands, Albert.
Whichever boy is in captivity, the other one keeps him company outside the chicken wire. They groom together and eat treats together and burble at each other.
The moment I open the door – and I have tried it, experimentally – they try to kill each other. To be more accurate, Sam tries to kill Albert.
Sam is about a quarter the size of Albert, but he’s little and quick and fierce and Albert is a big slow lummox with very poor eyesight due to his magnificent topknot. Sam once scared him so badly he flew over the hedge into the field next door, which was a joy to deal with.
I know what’s going to happen. Sam is a pekin and an elderly one for his breed. He’ll go first and I’ll be stuck with Albert, my least favorite chicken of all time. He’ll probably live forever.
p.s. Sam has been known to chase our pudding of a cat right up a tree.
October 2, 2025 — 5:34 pm
Comments: 4
Happy birthday, my old faux pas
Today is Julie Andrews’ 90th birthday. Woot!
I was four when Mary Poppins came out. I adored it. I made my mother take me to see it seven times.
One of those times we’d had a tropical downpour and we drove through an intersection where the water came up to our rocker panels. That doesn’t have anything at all to do with this story, it’s just one of those hyper vivid memories that sticks with you forever.
One day, I’m told I said thoughtfully to my mother, “Mother, if you died, do you think there’s a chance Papa would marry Julie Andrews?”
I don’t think she ever forgave me.
October 1, 2025 — 5:50 pm
Comments: 7
Moar hoarseradish
Not only Jerusalem artichokes – I got me a horseradish plantation! This is important because we went shopping today and I found a big pack of cooked and peeled shrimp on offer because the sell by is today.
I’ve got to make me a whole ton of cocktail sauce in a hurry!
p.s. Grok tells me you can freeze both horseradish and Jerusalem artichoke, crisis averted.
September 30, 2025 — 6:00 pm
Comments: 4
Google Lens correctly identified it
Our Jerusalem artichoke flowered! I thought sure it would stump Google Lens as it’s a perfectly ordinary looking yellow daisy, but its first solution was correct.
I have a metric shit ton of Jerusalem artichokes.
They don’t come from Jerusalem, of course. The name is probably derived from girasole, Italian for sunflower, and the artichoke part has to do with the flavor. (Somehow, WordPress has figured out I’m in England and has dinged me for not putting a u in flavor. Shoo, WordPress!).
Ooooo…Wikipedia says there’s soup!
September 29, 2025 — 4:56 pm
Comments: 4
I got a pot to piss in!
Not really – there’s a hole in the bottom. It’s a plant pot. A rusty iron one. It’s amazingly heavy. Another eccentric Ebay find.
Weasel hand for scale.
Have a good weekend!
September 26, 2025 — 6:09 pm
Comments: 9
Thank goodness I’m not Chinese
This call came in this afternoon and my phone advised me not to take it. So I didn’t. Then they left this message.
Bastards.
It gave me a turn for a moment, being an immigrant and all. But then I remembered I’m a citizen. And not Chinese.
Grok estimates there are 125,000 Chinese nationals in the UK, not counting those from Hong Kong, Macau, or Taiwan. It’s unclear whether that includes students. I wonder how many phones they had to ring before they scared some poor mook into answering?
September 25, 2025 — 5:41 pm
Comments: 1