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Notice anything?

The Daily Caller has been digging up old Obama videos. Yesterday, they unearthed the complete video of a speech he gave at Hampton University in 2007. The media reported about the speech at the time, but they reported on a sanitized “transcript” handed to them, not on the actual stuff coming out of his mouth. So all the shouty black man bits were taken out.

But I like today’s video nugget even better. It’s from a speech he gave at the University of Chicago on MLK Day in 2002.

I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but rich people are all for nonviolence. Why wouldn’t they be? They’ve got what they want. They want to make sure folks don’t take their stuff.

You don’t have to squint and tilt your head to see him justifying — even inciting — a little violence and robbery here.

Anyhow, I don’t think this is any kind of game changer. Only political junkies will ever see these clips, and everybody — even the folks who are going to vote for him — know he’s a phony, race-baiting jackhole by now.

But I wanted to call attention to something. Look at the pictures. What’s missing?

Yup. Obama was once able to give long, impassioned speeches with no more than a few notes on the podium. This guy. The one who can’t sing Happy Birthday today without his head ping-ponging between two ‘prompters.

I’m thinking it’s because the man they’re trying to project to the public is a complete lie. He would have no idea what to say if it weren’t written down, because all the words he utters are foreign to him.

Enjoy the debates tonight (as if!). They’re happening two in the morning our time, so I shan’t be staying up for them. I’ll be watching the highlight reel in the morning (unless something embarrassing happens. I can’t deal with that).

October 3, 2012 — 9:40 pm
Comments: 25

The seriousness they deserve

I know, I know. It’s the most important election of our lifetimes. You know what? Every single election of my adult life has been described (in all seriousness) as The Most Important Election of Our Lifetimes.

And it’s always true. And about half the time we win TMIEoOL, and about half the time we lose it, and society lumbers on.

Don’t mean to sound cynical, but do you know we’re about the only country in the Anglosphere without a tradition of joke parties? (Well, we did have the Cool Moose Party in Rhode Island. Go Rhody!).

At a minimum, joke parties thumb their noses at the main parties, who take themselves entirely too seriously. At best, they win a few seats and are able to wreak a little much-needed havoc on The System. I know, I know…third parties throw elections to the other guys. But sometimes I think…has the GOP really been a worthy custodian of our loyalties?

You’ve probably heard of the Official Monster Raving Loony Party (pictured) in the UK. There are scores of others, though…some with a serious point, others not so much.

There’s the Church of the Militant Elvis Party, which is a sort of anti-Tesco’s supermarket party. The Citizens for Undead Rights & Equality (CURE) is the largest Zombie rights organization in the world (launched as a publicity stunt for the video game series Dead Rising in 2010. They fielded four candidates and got three hundred something votes). There’s New Millenium Bean Party, run by an orange guy on the platform of letting children choose their parents and making tattoos bilingual. Then there was the I Want to Drop a Blancmange Down Terry Wogan’s Y-Fronts Party, which was…well…it’s a sort of a pudding and he’s a sort of a radio personality.

Oh, and they have ’em in New Zealand (hullo, Oceania!) and Europe and even Iceland. Turns out, there’s even a Lemon Party in Canada! They have vowed to restructure Canada’s economy to be centred on lemon production, support global warming so lemons can be grown in Canada, abolish Toronto and repeal the law of gravity. No relation to that other thing — if you wish to sleep soundly in your bed tonight, for the love of sweet baby Jesus, do not Google “lemon party.”

Oh, well. Maybe the next election won’t be The Most Important Election of Our Lifetimes, for once, and we can treat politics with the seriousness it deserves.

As if.

October 2, 2012 — 10:06 pm
Comments: 26

Don’t kick that pickle, lady!

Whatever. No, I don’t know, either. I stole the picture from Anorak because I pretty much got nothing.

I’ve spent the evening getting my father Skype’d up. Or, anyway, the iPad equivalent of Skype, Tango.

He’ll be 86 soon and he’s newly unleashed on the internet. He had a laptop for ages, but he kept getting it snarled up and finally gave up on it. He can just about grok the iPad.

So today I rummaged around in the back room and found my old webcam (so old there isn’t a Windows 7 driver for it), downloaded this piece of videophone ‘ware and gave him a call.

He was stonked. It was like ten minutes of, “I can see you! Can you see me? I can see me! Can you see me? I’m down in a little block in the left corner and you’re all over the screen! It rang just like a real phone. I heard it and everything! I can see you! And you’re in England!”

Which was funny and sweet. And then he rang off, “this is great! We can watch opera together and I can teach you to play the harmonica and everything!”

So, there’s that.

October 1, 2012 — 9:54 pm
Comments: 18