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ROUND TEN: die slower, I have to buy more dicks

Steve wins again, with KKK Grand Kleagle and Exalted Cyclops Robert Carlyle Byrd. He also won Round Nine, and was cheated out of Round Eight by my confusion over time zones, meaning he has actually won three times in a row. The officially makes steve a Very Scary Guy. Like that spooky damn cat in Rhode Island.

Okay — here we go:

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of.

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks are positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt it out this time, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you don’t want the fabulous prize, you are a gentleman and a…well, a lady if you’re the other kind. It takes me forever to put them in the mail. Packages go by slow boat, typically take eight to ten weeks and arrive looking very sad and ill-used.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the previous honoree pops his clogs.

The fabulous prize? Sweasel dot com’s unofficial sponsor, Aunty’s Spotted Dick, of course! Mmmmm…it’s dickalicious!


Comment from Pablo
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:01 pm

Senator Robert Byr…shit!

Zsa Zsa Gabor. Die already, damn you!

Comment from Janna
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:01 pm

Jimmah Carter…Please

Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:08 pm

Roger Ebert’s pissed me off lately so I’ll go with him.

Comment from Scubafreak
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:25 pm

I think I’ll stick with Abe Vigoda.

Comment from tawny
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:33 pm

Sen. Frank Lautenberg

Comment from Stacy
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:42 pm

Jennifer Capriati

Comment from mongo
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:45 pm

Ruth Ginsburg. C’mon already!!!

Comment from tawny
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:45 pm

Stacey: I dithered about Capriati, but in the end decided against. Maybe I chose badly. 🙂

Comment from mongo
Time: July 2, 2010, 6:46 pm

Oh, but I hope I lose and Enas wins. Just sayin’.

Comment from Elphaba
Time: July 2, 2010, 7:11 pm

Nancy Pelosi, for the love of God.

Comment from Elphaba
Time: July 2, 2010, 7:13 pm

I realize that I probably should have let Steve pick her first. Better chance of success. 😉

Comment from Dawn
Time: July 2, 2010, 7:16 pm

Dick Cheney. I cringe to say it. He’s my hero.

Comment from Gromulin
Time: July 2, 2010, 7:17 pm

Going with Gore Vidal again…WFB has some unfinished bidness with him.

Comment from Spad13
Time: July 2, 2010, 7:25 pm

Dan Rather.

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: July 2, 2010, 8:27 pm

Lauren Bacall isn’t getting any younger.

Comment from Montenegro
Time: July 2, 2010, 8:29 pm

Once again I’ll take Fidel Castro (I guess I just want to hear Obama make more of a fool of himself singing the praises of this “great leader”)

Comment from Armybrat
Time: July 2, 2010, 8:34 pm

I’m going with Mohamed Ali again.

Comment from hemmersheim
Time: July 2, 2010, 9:20 pm

Clint Eastwood……….

I hope I lose…..to Elphaba…..

Comment from rustbucket
Time: July 2, 2010, 9:31 pm

Ernest Borgnine…and I hope I’m wrong

Comment from MrCaniac
Time: July 2, 2010, 9:37 pm

Back to Barbara Billingsly. Hot back in the day, and she speaks Jive! She’s 94 now and not happy that “Ghost Whisperer” was canceled.

Comment from hemmersheim
Time: July 2, 2010, 10:50 pm

wonderin if I shoulda picked Monika Lewinski’s boyfriend……..


Comment from Horti
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:22 pm

Andy Rooney

Comment from steve
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:24 pm

Who has his or her foot, already on the banana peel?

Delores Hope, that’s who!

Mrs. Bob Hope is the 101 year old surviving spouse of the very famous guy, Bob Hope….

Which makes her…more like….the wife of a celebrity….and possibly not, actually, a celebrity in her own right…

Very similar to Hillary Clinton, in that regard….

Comment from gulliblepratt
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:31 pm

oooooo No ones gone for Betty White
Till now

Comment from EZnSF
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:37 pm

George McGovern

Comment from JeffS
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:46 pm

Congresscritter Alan Grayson, a genuine creep, if not certifiably insane.

Comment from John from CA
Time: July 2, 2010, 11:50 pm

“hmmmm, tough choice but I guess I’d have to go with Jesse James — if he doesn’t have aids yet he’s likely to pass something on the road and weasel away.”

Let’s face it, as a celeb he’s now dead.

btw: 6pm in what time zone?

Comment from Lipstick
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:11 am

Christopher Hitchens.

Comment from Mrs. Peel
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:13 am

I will continue my tradition of totally off-the-wall picks and go with Richard Dawson. Haven’t heard he’s ill, but there’s no telling what he picked up with all that smooching over the years.

mmm, smooching

Comment from ChicagoJedi
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:25 am

I hate to say it but someone from Star Trek will be boldly going… Leonard Nimoy.

Comment from eirik
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:49 am

Lets go with Jack LaLane again. All that healthy living can’t be good for you.

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:36 am

I’m goin with Hitchens. 🙂

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:41 am

Oh man, didn’t read the list on my iPhone and someone got Hitchens…I’ll have to actually think now…

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:47 am

Okay, mr. E. Regina, prince of England. He’s old, and just the antics of his offspring should be enough to make him want to check out.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:07 am

Just because it’s time the old sleaze starts rotting physically as well as morally…

Prince Norodom Sihanouk.

Comment from TimB52
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:09 am

I’m staying with Penny Marshall

Comment from Dave in Texas
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:32 am

Feh.. okay.. sing along with Mitch Miller.

Comment from Pavel
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:44 am

Ima take my fave, Billy Graham.

Intended to be here at 0600 SBT, but freaking clients were all, Hey, where are you, and I’m all hey, I gotta dead pool to enter and I want Jimmah Carter, and they’re all, Hey, you want clients or spotted dick, and I’m, okay, maybe Jimmah can make it through at least one more dead pool.

PS to Billy G if you’re reading this: nothing personal, man. Spotted dick on the line. Please don’t plead with the Father to burn my soul everlastingly, bro.

Comment from Don Carne
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:54 am

Anybody pick Phyllis Diller? If not, then: Phillis Diller. she’s gotta be nearing the end.

Comment from Chairman Mow
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:01 am

Clint Eastwood….damn I hate myself.

Comment from Kyle Kiernan
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:02 am

Kirk Douglas, he looks due and the tabloids are pushing him towards the grave.

Comment from Max Entropy
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:04 am

Kim Jing Il if he’s not dead already.

Comment from Chairman MowOh
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:08 am

Oh poop. Clint was picked. Kim Jung I’ll is now my boy.He’s so ronery.

Comment from Chairman Mow
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:13 am

Dammit! Adam Gadan.Come on CIA get that fat prick.

Comment from memomachine
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:36 am


“PS to Billy G if you’re reading this: nothing personal, man. Spotted dick on the line. Please don’t plead with the Father to burn my soul everlastingly, bro.”

Don’t hellfire me bro!

Alan Alda

Because he’s the one that started all that emotional guy with touchy feely feelings thing. Before that all a guy had to do was hold his whiskey, take showers and maintain an erection.

Now? We gotta “talk”.

Comment from Dan B
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:44 am

I’m going for tragic:
Afshan Azad

Comment from Allen
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:51 am

Osama bin Laden. I’m stickin’ with the al Qaeda dudes.

I will gladly trade you one Hellfire today for a Spotted Richard on Monday.

Comment from DSkinner
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:54 am

I’ll go with Fidel’s brother Raul. Have a feeling he’ll go before Fidel.

Comment from Tushar
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:00 am

Arlen Specter

*Please God, let me win. And this is not about the spotted dick. I won’t eat something like that anyway*

Comment from Retarded Chimp
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:05 am

Al Gore- like anyone would notice

Comment from Rickshaw Jack
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:09 am

Gavin MacLeod

Comment from John from CA
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:10 am

hmmmm – Friday 9:02pm Pacific Time — unless the “sW” is in Hawaii, looks like the 6pm is past — I probably missed something obvious?

Weasel time is set to the EC debt clock?

Yikes, what year is this?

Comment from Mumbles
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:11 am

Herb Alpert. I love, love, love his tunes, but he’s been pretty scarce lately, and his brass is old.

Comment from karabins
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:14 am

Al Molinaro

(“Al” from Happy Days)

Comment from Roman Wolf
Time: July 3, 2010, 5:14 am

Mike Wallace for me.

Comment from PatAZ
Time: July 3, 2010, 5:32 am

Hamid Karzai He has to be close to 90 now.

Comment from Kansas Gman
Time: July 3, 2010, 5:34 am

50 Cent. I’d say we are about due for some more rappers to get capped.

Comment from F. Lee Bailout
Time: July 3, 2010, 6:09 am

Eminem…please, if there is a god…Eminem.

Comment from robotgossip
Time: July 3, 2010, 6:11 am

Kenny in South Park.
Ok for real now, no pasties. Ray Bradbury. For now only death is faster than light.

Comment from Pork Alfredo
Time: July 3, 2010, 8:53 am

Phillies manager Charlie Manuel.

Comment from Arthur Kimes
Time: July 3, 2010, 9:25 am

Larry King. He might actually have died some years ago but he’s still animate so he’s eligible.

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: July 3, 2010, 9:50 am

Mel Gibson

He’s going to piss someone off royally and they are going to cap his ass.

Comment from Blazer
Time: July 3, 2010, 10:41 am

Amy Winehouse. Sooner or later she’s gonna piss off her crack dealer and he’s gonna take her out.

Comment from Joe
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:37 am

Bill Clinton……bad heart you know…..

Comment from Americano
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:41 am

Dick VanDyke

Comment from Bill (still the .00358% of your traffic that’s from Iraq) T
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:50 am

If the dirtbags figure out how to set the fuze on an Iranian 107mm rocket properly, I’ll pick *me*.

Dang — *not* famous.

Okay, Henry Waxman, for the good of America.

And if Steve wins again, I say we change the rules a bit and vote for the person we most want Steve to pick in the *next* round.

Comment from Open Channel D
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:56 am

Frank Cady.

I have a feeling about this one…

Comment from just visiting
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:56 am

Courtney Love

Comment from harrison
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:17 pm

Carl Reiner, please, FTW.

Comment from WillOTP
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:19 pm

Nancy Reagan…Don’t want to see her go, but she is meant to be with Ronnie.

Comment from thefritz
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:25 pm

Reverend Sun Myung Moon. Yeah I know I’m betting against those Asian longevity genes….

Comment from JBintheOB
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:39 pm

It pains me to mention it, and if wrong I will sing a thousand songs, but I go with Andy Griffith. Gotta have somebody to keep an eye on Barney.

Comment from Lincolntf
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:51 pm

John Madden. Summer’s got to be tough on a guy with his build.

Comment from my_dick_hurts
Time: July 3, 2010, 12:55 pm

I hate to add this, but Dick Cheney isn’t gonna last too many heart attacks.

Comment from Truman North
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:10 pm

Greetings from delightful Massachusetts!

I’ll take Joyce DeWitt


Comment from David Gillies
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:12 pm

Once again, and as usual more in hope than expectation, J. Gordon Brown, erstwhile PM but still thoroughly poor excuse for a human being.

Comment from JMSmith
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:15 pm

If there is a God it will be Sarah Palin from bubonic plague.

Comment from Rocks
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:24 pm

Ruth Ginsberg

Comment from joncelli
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:28 pm

I keep going with Noam Chomsky and the bastard keeps living, so I speet on heem [ptui] and pick Michael Vick. The guy’s been pissing too many people off and we haven’t had an NFL murder in a while.

Comment from DLFarley
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:29 pm

Any crazy Kennedy that’s left!

Comment from mandel bread
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:39 pm

Patti Page

“How much is that reaper in the window,” sing it Patti!

Comment from Wineaholic
Time: July 3, 2010, 1:45 pm

Andy Rooney. Did you ever notice that… he’s one old fuck?

Comment from Not a football fan
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:00 pm

Felipe Melo, the Brazilian football sub who got credited with the own goal, leading to Brazil’s unexpected exit from the World Cup. Brazil? Own goal? He’s toast……

Comment from Lolly
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:16 pm

The evil, wicked, queen of nasty!

Helen Thomas

And DO take it with you sweety!

Comment from Accidental Tourist
Time: July 3, 2010, 2:56 pm

The entire NORK soccer team, at once, in a training exercise gone horribly wrong.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:09 pm

Apologies to those who got stuck in the spam filter. Did anybody lose a pick over it?

Comment from Patrick S
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:13 pm

Gotta go with Betty Ford….something like 92 with a boozy past…..

Comment from eman
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:14 pm


Comment from JKH1232
Time: July 3, 2010, 3:59 pm

Linsey Lohan. Just sayin’.

Comment from apotheosis
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:03 pm

Justin Beiber.

Because I like a longshot.

Comment from Ronsonic
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:03 pm

Robin Williams, something involving cocaine, a garden tractor and some unknown comic claiming his shit was stolen.

Comment from gebrauchshund
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:18 pm

Wow, this far along and Michael Moore hasn’t been picked yet? I’ll take him, from choking on a turkey. Not a turkey bone, a whole turkey.

Comment from Warm Mountain
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:31 pm

Naomi Campbell. Just because.

Comment from Tushar
Time: July 3, 2010, 4:58 pm

>>Comment from JMSmith
>>Time: July 3, 2010, 1:15 pm
>>If there is a God it will be Sarah Palin from bubonic plague.

I am changing my pick to JMSmith. May his asshole roast in hell.

Comment from mpfs
Time: July 3, 2010, 5:55 pm

Hate to say it.

Maureen O’Hara.

Comment from AndrewsDad
Time: July 3, 2010, 5:58 pm

Daniel Inouye

Could be age, 86, could be the risks associated with airline travel.

Comment from Russ from Winterset
Time: July 3, 2010, 6:32 pm

Jimmy Carter. He hasn’t been picked yet, and there’s still room in hell…so I’m going with Mr. Malaise hisself.

Comment from Russ from Winterset
Time: July 3, 2010, 6:33 pm

dammit dammit dammit. Comment #2. Well, I’ll go with Robert Downey Jr. for the block. Just because heroin doesn’t like it when you leave her.

Comment from Wrobin
Time: July 3, 2010, 7:09 pm

Grand Ayatollah Khamemei of Iran. I can hear the Israeli jets revving their engines right now.

Comment from Foster Brooks
Time: July 3, 2010, 7:12 pm

Dean Martin!

Comment from skinbad
Time: July 3, 2010, 7:34 pm

Alan Greenspan

Comment from alo89
Time: July 3, 2010, 7:54 pm

Doris Day.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 3, 2010, 9:21 pm

Doris is took, alo.

Is there something wrong with Joyce deWitt, Truman North? She’s only 61.

Comment from Steve I n Tulsa
Time: July 3, 2010, 9:32 pm

Peter O’Toole, god love him!

Comment from TXMarko
Time: July 3, 2010, 9:37 pm

Harry Reid.

Preferably after he gets run out of DC on a rail…

Comment from Mike C.
Time: July 3, 2010, 10:16 pm

I’ll be consistent Charles Johnson of LGF, because he needs to die already.

Why aall the repeat picks on the thread ? Doesn’t anybody bother to read down first ? Sheesh !

Comment from Mike C.
Time: July 3, 2010, 10:19 pm

Sorry – shouldn’t try to post while I’m cooking.

Comment from Woolie M.
Time: July 3, 2010, 10:58 pm

I will go with Henry Kissinger (He’s up there in years)
Hope I lose. My thoughts about this man have changed over the decades. I realised that I was (we all) were being lied to from the MFM. Thank Mankind for the alternate news available today. The MFM has fallen down on the job, and it wants another beer.

Comment from Cooked in AZ
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:16 pm

Jerry Brown; because California deserves better.

Comment from BigBlueBug
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:21 pm

In honor of the commie spy ring broken up in Cambridge (Moscow on the Charles) –> Pete Seegar.

The 90 year old Bolshie is my ticket to Auntie’s Dick.
Nom nom nom.

Please Oscar kitty, go snuggle up to the wrinkled old hippie, that’s a good boy.

BBB – Hating commies since 1972

Comment from Mike D.
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:32 pm

O.J. Simpson…because, you know, HE DID IT !!!

Comment from Tom
Time: July 3, 2010, 11:56 pm

Nobody thought of Brett Michaels?

Comment from rockhead
Time: July 4, 2010, 12:12 am

The old socialist b’tard Ed Asner.

Comment from Mija Cat
Time: July 4, 2010, 12:38 am

Staying with Tom Baker. No offense to Dr. Who fans of a certain age.

Comment from sherlock
Time: July 4, 2010, 12:49 am

Dan Schorr – c’mon Dan, you can do it!

Comment from Hush
Time: July 4, 2010, 2:21 am

Umm is doesn’t seem that anyone picked this asshole but I’m gonna go with the Lockerbie Bomber: Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi

OK back to lurkin’…

Comment from Pupster
Time: July 4, 2010, 2:57 am

Betty White was already picked?



I’ll go with Mullah Omar.

Comment from Nora Trane
Time: July 4, 2010, 4:11 am

former Sen. John Glenn (demoNrat – Ohio)

Comment from The War Planner
Time: July 4, 2010, 5:50 am

Barack Obama..

..failing that, my wicked stepmother, Virginia Reardon, in a Pasadena assisted living facility with more tubes in her than the law allows.

Comment from charlie hutcheson
Time: July 4, 2010, 7:21 am

How about R. Lee Ermey Dont wanna see it tho

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: July 4, 2010, 7:31 am

Omg no one took her? I tots Maggie thatcher!!!!

Comment from Jack is Back!
Time: July 4, 2010, 8:21 am

Robert Wagner. Too many reverse mortgages get you every time!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 4, 2010, 11:40 am

Ha! I was going to call dibs on Maggie on your behalf, Mrs C. Knowing as you’re always first in line with that pick.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: July 4, 2010, 3:48 pm

Aw thanks Mz Weazie! But looks like I lucked out! Now let’s all hope I loose! Some new picks up there, should be an interesting game!!

Comment from The War Planner
Time: July 4, 2010, 3:58 pm

..hey, I really *do* mean it when I took Obama. The guy is gonna peg out when his numbers fall into the thirties and people stop loving him. I’m guessing they will find him in one of the WH restrooms with a needle in his arm and a ciggie drooping from his former-flapping, lying, purple lips.

(Lessee? Can I possibly summon up any more vitriol?)

The selection of my wicked stepmother is because (1) this dead pool thing seems to be working and (2) she stands athwart a family fortune that should have accrued to me years ago.

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 4, 2010, 8:39 pm

I’m a virgin to this wishing death on strangers, so be kind…and gimme a reach-around when we’re done, how bout it?

I want Rahm “tinkerbell” Emanuel. Ft Marcy Park has an unused tree with a view that’s blocked from passersby. Vince Foster found fame there, and with Urkel X’s number swirling the flushable punch bowl, I say the “Crisis” prick gets his own crisis and ends it with a muffled thump and some refreshing moisture for the tree of liberty…tyrant flavor, dontcha know…

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 4, 2010, 8:42 pm

Failing that, gimme Lady Gaga for 100, Alex…in the category “Things that happen to hermaphrodites in sleazy S.American clinics finishing sex-reassignment surgery on the cheap”…and fix that nose MISTER Gaga…geez, what a beak…

Comment from Hotrodelectric
Time: July 4, 2010, 9:35 pm

Nobody picks the Maj herself? Arighty,then! Liz Taylor FTW!
I hope so- I gotta get some Dick in me…

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 4, 2010, 10:59 pm

Sorry about the detour into the spam filter, Cooked in AZ.

We’re not exactly wishing death here, sandman. It’s perfectly okay to pick somebody you like and hope will live forever. We’re all about the dick.

On the other hand, if you pick somebody you can’t stand, and he dies — bonus!

Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: July 5, 2010, 12:41 am

Well, since eirik not only misspelled LaLanne but stole my pick as well, I’m gonna go with some justice and wish for Eric Holder. In a case of petty larceny gone bad in an alley in DC.

Comment from EW1(SG)
Time: July 5, 2010, 2:31 am

And to clarify, since nobody else will do it for me, what I am wishing for is some of Aunty’s spotted dick, and it would be ever so nice if it were occasioned by the passing of a real scoundrel.

Not that I want the dick so badly as to cheat.

And I guess it’s fair to say at this point that steve really is all dicked, hain’t he?

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: July 5, 2010, 4:19 am

Charlie Sheen, because you can only have so much fun before you screw up permanently…

Comment from Ace’s liver
Time: July 5, 2010, 9:21 am

Somebody already took Nimoy – I’ll take Shatner. The guy’s old and he’s as big as a house!

Comment from scr_north
Time: July 5, 2010, 12:22 pm

I pick……. Steve Jobs! Somebody has to pay for the iPad.

Comment from Princess Bernie
Time: July 5, 2010, 1:41 pm

Al Franken. PLEASE!

Comment from Bill Spencer
Time: July 5, 2010, 4:54 pm

Peter Falk

And may God have mercy on my soul.

Comment from roamingfirehydrant
Time: July 5, 2010, 7:43 pm

Going to go with Dr. Joyce Brothers again.

Comment from Jones
Time: July 5, 2010, 10:22 pm

Bill Maher. A guy can dream…

Comment from Roger Ebert is Teh Suck
Time: July 6, 2010, 12:18 am

Roger fucking Ebert

Rot in piss you evil old turd.

Comment from Mike
Time: July 6, 2010, 12:46 am

Carol Channing, and if I can have a second pick, Bob Barker.

Comment from Tattoo De Plane
Time: July 6, 2010, 2:01 pm

Hugh Hefner… I’m loyal to my picks like that.

JMSmith, though someone else has already wished your asshole is roasted in hell, I will add that I hope it is raped with a rusty chainsaw first. Burning alive with a bad case of tetanus is a medieval punishment worthy of your shitty remark.

Comment from pendejo grande
Time: July 6, 2010, 2:10 pm


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: July 6, 2010, 3:46 pm

Liza Minnelli – that’s Liza with a Z….


Comment from Enas Yorl
Time: July 6, 2010, 4:33 pm

Sorry, Mr. Teh Suck but Roger Ebert was nabbed quickly in this round. You’ll just have to pick a different evil old turd.

Comment from Mr. Matamoros
Time: July 6, 2010, 6:55 pm

Once again, I nominate America’s oldest teenager, Dick Clark…

Comment from mintypickle
Time: July 6, 2010, 7:49 pm

Jeffrey Jones, a.k.a. Principal Ed Rooney, a.k.a. Filthy Child Pornographer

Kiddie pr0n…that shit’ll catch up with you.

Comment from VKI
Time: July 6, 2010, 11:20 pm

Henry Johnson – Guam is going to tip over and take him with it.

Comment from Jeff Weimer
Time: July 7, 2010, 2:31 pm

Jack Klugman. Old as dirt, had throat cancer.

Comment from JinEugene
Time: July 8, 2010, 2:45 am

I’ll take Manhattan.

Yeah, the Baked Apple. The Pakis have nukes already, and the Iranians aren’t far behind.

Comment from Bender Bending Rodriguez
Time: July 8, 2010, 5:12 am

I’ll take John Cleese, but I’ll be pissed off for weeks if I win.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: July 10, 2010, 12:04 am

It’s been a week, no one has died, and the entries have pretty much stopped. So here is The List:

Ace’s liver – Shatner
Allen – Osama bin Laden
alo89 – Doris Day.
Americano – Dick VanDyke
AndrewsDad – Daniel Inouye
apotheosis – Justin Beiber
Armybrat – Mohamed Ali
Arthur Kimes – Larry King
Bender Bending Rodriguez – John Cleese
BigBlueBug – Pete Seeger
Bill (still the .00358% of your traffic that’s from Iraq) T – Henry Waxman
Bill Spencer – Peter Falk
Blazer – Amy Winehouse
Chairman Mow – Adam Gadan
charlie hutcheson – R. Lee Ermey
ChicagoJedi – Leonard Nimoy
Cooked in AZ – Jerry Brown
Dan B – Afshan Azad
Dave in Texas – Mitch Miller
David Gillies – J. Gordon Brown
Dawn – Dick Cheney
Don Carne – Phyllis Diller
DSkinner – Raul Castro
eirik – Jack LaLanne
Elphaba – Nancy Pelosi
Enas Yorl – Roger Ebert
enter sandman – Rahm “tinkerbell” Emanuel
EW1(SG) – Eric Holder
EZnSF – George McGovern
F. Lee Bailout – Eminem
Foster Brooks – Dean Martin
gebrauchshund – Michael Moore
Gromulin – Gore Vidal
gulliblepratt – Betty White
harrison – Carl Reiner
hemmersheim – Clint Eastwood
Horti – Andy Rooney
Hotrodelectric – Liz Taylor
Hush – Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi
Jack is Back! – Robert Wagner
Janna – Jimmah Carter
JBintheOB – Andy Griffith
Jeff Weimer – Jack Klugman
JeffS – Congresscritter Alan Grayson
JKH1232 – Lindsey Lohan
JMSmith – Sarah Palin
Joe – Bill Clinton
John from CA – Jesse James
joncelli – Michael Vick
Jones – Bill Maher
just visiting – Courtney Love
Kansas Gman – 50 Cent
karabins – Al Molinaro
Kyle Kiernan – Kirk Douglas
Lincolntf – John Madden
Lipstick – Christopher Hitchens
Lolly – Helen Thomas
mandel bread – Patti Page
Max Entropy – Kim Jong Il
memomachine – Alan Alda
Mija Cat – Tom Baker
Mike – Carol Channing
Mike C. – Charles Johnson
Mike D. – O.J. Simpson
mintypickle – Jeffrey Jones
mpfs – Maureen O’Hara
Mr. Matamoros – Dick Clark
MrCaniac – Barbara Billingsly
Mrs Compton – Maggie thatcher
Mrs. Peel – Richard Dawson
Mumbles – Herb Alpert
Nora Trane – John Glenn
Not a football fan – Felipe Melo
Oh Hell – Charlie Sheen
Open Channel D – Frank Cady
Pablo – Zsa Zsa Gabor
PatAZ – Hamid Karzai
Patrick S – Betty Ford
Pavel – Billy Graham
Pork Alfredo – Charlie Manuel
Princess Bernie – Al Franken
Pupster – Mullah Omar
Retarded Chimp – Al Gore
Rich Rostrom – Prince Norodom Sihanouk
Rickshaw Jack – Gavin MacLeod
roamingfirehydrant – Dr. Joyce Brothers
robotgossip – Ray Bradbury
rockhead – Ed Asner
Rocks – Ruth Ginsberg
Roman Wolf – Mike Wallace
Ronsonic – Robin Williams
Russ from Winterset – Robert Downey Jr.
rustbucket – Ernest Borgnine
SCOTTtheBADGER – Lauren Bacall
scr_north – Steve Jobs
Scubafreak – Abe Vigoda
sherlock – Dan Schorr
skinbad – Alan Greenspan
Some Vegetable – Liza Minnelli
Spad13 – Dan Rather
Stacy – Jennifer Capriati
steve – Delores Hope
Steve In Tulsa – Peter O’Toole
Tattoo De Plane – Hugh Hefner
tawny – Sen. Frank Lautenberg
The War Planner – Barack Obama
thefritz – Reverend Sun Myung Moon
TimB52 – Penny Marshall
Timothy S. Carlson – Mel Gibson
Tom – Brett Michaels
Truman North – Joyce DeWitt
Tushar – Arlen Specter
TXMarko – Harry Reid
VKI – Henry Johnson
Warm Mountain – Naomi Campbell
WillOTP – Nancy Reagan
Woolie M. – Henry Kissinger
Wrobin – Grand Ayatollah Khamenei of Iran

These three picks were kind of ambiguous. If resolved incorrectly, please say.

Montenegro – Fidel Castro
Nina from GCP – Prince Phillip (“mr. E. Regina”?)
pendejo grande – OZZY!!! Osbourne

These picks were preempted:

eman – Leonard Nimoy
mongo – Ruth Ginsburg
my_dick_hurts – Dick Cheney
Roger Ebert is Teh Suck – Roger Ebert
Wineaholic – Andy Rooney

These picks are not valid picks, I’d think. Ms. Weasel?

DLFarley – Any crazy Kennedy that’s left!
(not a person)
Tushar – I am changing my pick to JMSmith. May his asshole roast in hell.
(not famous)

Dick Dick Goose!

Comment from Mija Cat
Time: July 10, 2010, 2:47 am

Ah, I’d been wondering when The Listmaker would wander by.

Cat wishes to change his vote.

Donald Berwick. He’s not precisely “famous”, but Obama just named him head of Medicare/Medicaid. What dear Donald is arguably “famous” for is for, apparently, experiencing romantic feelings for the Brit NHS.


Comment from Montenegro
Time: July 12, 2010, 2:01 am

That’s the first time I’ve been ambiguous in my life……Yeah Fidel’s my pick for Aunty’s big dick!

Comment from steve
Time: July 13, 2010, 1:52 pm

George Steinbrener…..Fuck!

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 14, 2010, 1:10 am

And Don Knotts!

(Now that I’m on the current Dead Thread, not the last one)

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 14, 2010, 1:15 am

And to the Listmaker: You are correct. 🙂

Comment from Nina from GCP
Time: July 14, 2010, 5:27 pm

Tony Curtis is in the hospital…

Comment from Cobrakai99
Time: July 16, 2010, 1:54 am

Hugo Chavez choking on parrot feathers.

Comment from Mija Cat
Time: July 17, 2010, 1:46 am

Hey, umm, boss? Mistress Weasel?

The link on the main page doesn’t point down here to the dungeon – it points over to the old dungeon.

I know the difference but, well, the first-timers and non-drunkards may not be so lucky…


Comment from N.O’Really
Time: July 18, 2010, 4:09 am

Looks like Pablo has the inside track — Zha Zha fell out of bed and broke several bones.

Comment from Luis
Time: July 18, 2010, 2:22 pm

Zsa Zsa Gabor.

Comment from Luis
Time: July 18, 2010, 2:24 pm

Oops. Missed Pablo’s choice.

I chose Jerry Buss, owner of L. A. Lakers, who already looks embalmed.

Comment from Luis
Time: July 18, 2010, 7:18 pm

Larry King.

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 22, 2010, 11:56 pm

I want Xavier Cugat’s gay stunt double, Fidel Castro.
Is that crusty old leftist bastard still around? Is he taken? Probably, so I’ll punt and go with…Hugh Hefner, the man who printed porn on the Exodus out of Egypt. Or am I too early for a new Dead Pool pick?

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 22, 2010, 11:58 pm

Damn, both taken.
I’ve got to think about this one.

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 23, 2010, 12:24 am

Got it:
WILLIE NELSON!!! elebenty!!!!!!11!11!11!1…

Comment from Kansas Gman
Time: July 23, 2010, 7:07 pm

Congratulations to Sherlock.

Comment from enter sandman
Time: July 24, 2010, 2:21 am

daniel Shorr…still dead.

Comment from J2
Time: July 25, 2010, 6:03 pm

Eli Wallach….

for a few dicks more

Comment from J2
Time: July 25, 2010, 6:13 pm

d. feinstein (DNoz-CA) would be the dick pick….. but maybe next round just before she gets her ass kicked in november….

Comment from J2
Time: July 25, 2010, 6:17 pm

and this is for Dave in TX…. (ya thievin’ bastard)


Comment from hemmersheim
Time: July 25, 2010, 7:17 pm

I see where ole zsa zsa is in bad shape……..unresponsive in a hospital……
Link: http://tinyurl.com/2wuz5fc

Comment from Montenegro
Time: September 30, 2010, 2:40 pm

Does Nina win this one??

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