Seems like a contradiction in terms
Water cremation. Just legalized in Scotland.
That’s what they call it, anyhoo. What they actually do is boil your corpse in potassium hydroxide and water for ninety minutes, leaving behind a nice, clean skeleton. Which they smash to powder and give to your family.
I guess the you slurry goes down the drain.
All of this is because – you guessed it – it’s greener than regular cremation. Cremation seems all very hands-off and clinical. I’m okay with it. This sounds like something I’d hate to imagine happening to someone I love.
Posted: March 2nd, 2026 under personal.
Comments: 8
Comments
Comment from Anonymous
Time: March 2, 2026, 8:47 pm
Everything old is new again! I have personally seen the big, big black pot in which General Mad Anthony Wayne’s body was boiled off his bones in 1819.
It left quite an impression on a 9-year-old. For what it’s worth it’s much bigger than it appears in pictures.
https://www.roadsideamerica.com/story/15749
Having said that it seems rather a waste of effort and expense. Couldn’t Scotland just make it a thing where they wait for an electric car to catch fire and since they can’t put it out anyway they could just toss the deceased body in the fire like the Indians used to do?
Comment from Uncle AL
Time: March 2, 2026, 9:51 pm
@Anon0847 — I like your sense of frugal practicality.
My own preference is to be turned into pet food. Uncle ALpo, perhaps, or IAMS IWASS. Otherwise I’d end up a waste of perfectly suitable protein.
Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: March 2, 2026, 10:29 pm
Here’s the traditional recipe for boiled Scottsman:
“Double, double toil and trouble;
Fire burn and caldron bubble.
Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the caldron [Scotsman] boil and bake;
[Add]Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog,
Adder’s fork and blind-worm’s sting,
Lizard’s leg and howlet’s wing.
Comment from The Neon Madman
Time: March 2, 2026, 10:32 pm
I told my wife to keep it simple and cheap- $20 tipping fee at the landfill. Back the truck up to the dumpster and away I go.
Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: March 3, 2026, 1:32 am
I’m torn between having my soul stuck on the roof of our property in East Texas, or being stuck on the roof here in the Metroplex.
One way or another it’s the crackly fire for me, or I refuse to die.
Comment from Gordon R. Durand
Time: March 3, 2026, 4:46 am
I personally prefer Tibetan sky burial, or at least midwestern composting.
Comment from Pupster
Time: March 3, 2026, 5:52 am
I’d prefer a Viking funeral. Since I’m poor just chuck me on to somebody else’s yacht and set it on fire.
Comment from Deborah HH
Time: March 3, 2026, 3:31 pm
I used to think that I wanted to be cremated and ashes scattered, but then I started working on my family genealogy and changed my mind. I never imagined that I’d care so much about where my people are buried.
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