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Round 27: the Summer of Dick


A dick for a dick – FGW wins it with Dick Clark.

Eighty-two. I’d’ve guessed older. Something about trying to look forever young will do that.

Okay, here we go…!

0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay?

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you don’t want the fabulous prize, you’re too smart to be a regular. It takes me forever to put them in the mail, packages go by slow boat, typically take minimum eight to ten weeks and lose the will to live along the way.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

What do we want? Aunty’s dick! When do we want it? When somebody on the list dies!

Comments


Comment from AltBBrown
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:01 pm

Staying with Stephen Hawking for the win!


Comment from Redd
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:01 pm

FIDEL


Comment from Carl
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:01 pm

Robin Gibb of the Bee Gees for the third time. Third time lucky? (for me that is, not for poor Robin).


Comment from steve
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:02 pm

Robin Gibb


Comment from Mrs. Compton
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:02 pm

Margaret Thatcher.


Comment from Allen
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:03 pm

For my pick, Jiroemon Kimura, who is famous for being the oldest living man, at 115.


Comment from Fawn
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:03 pm

Jerry Lewis, again!


Comment from Gromulin
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:03 pm

Kirk Douglas FTW


Comment from Gromulin
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:04 pm

But, Man…since it’s 4/20 it was hard not to pick Willie Nelson…


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:05 pm

Levon Helm Chuck Colson!


Comment from Nina
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:05 pm

Hugo!


Comment from Retread
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:06 pm

Obama’s dog Bo.


Comment from tawny
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:09 pm

Robert Mugabe


Comment from RushBabe
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:12 pm

Lockerbie bomber al-Megrahi. Die already, ya bastid!


Comment from steve
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:13 pm

Damn You Carl!

Muhammed Ali, FTW


Comment from huerfano
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:14 pm

Rosalynn Carter.


Comment from BigBluBug
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:27 pm

Charles Milles Manson


Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:30 pm

Ahmadinejad


Comment from Uncle Al
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:35 pm

I’ll stick with the capo di tutti capi of the International Bankster Mafia, David Rockefeller.


Comment from JeffS
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:35 pm

Jimmy Carter! He’s a dick who has spent way too much time on this planet.


Comment from Malcolm Kirkpatrick
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:37 pm

Dr. Ayman al-Zawahiri, in Waziristan, with a Hellfire, if Allah so will.


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:46 pm

Kirk Douglas

Whups, taken. Who to pick?


Comment from mojo
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:49 pm

Hamid Karzai, President of Afghanistan


Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:51 pm

Larry King! (Anytime I go to shout something it usually comes out Ron Paul! like everybody else but I stopped myself).


Comment from Feynmangroupie
Time: April 20, 2012, 7:04 pm

Ah Dangit Retread, I was gonna say that, and was feeling all proud of myself for being so witty. poop!

Let’s go with Joseph Kony


Comment from Dustoffmom
Time: April 20, 2012, 7:06 pm

Ernest Borgnine
(Cheney got a new heart so he should be around a while yet)


Comment from harbqll
Time: April 20, 2012, 7:08 pm

Bill Ayers. I bet Lil Barry is pretty ticked at him right now for putting that dog-eating BS into his fake autobiography.


Comment from yippee mcskittles bear mcsandman
Time: April 20, 2012, 7:18 pm

I’m going with Jesse Jackson and Al SHarpton. I’m going for a dual snuff out: riot-related, shooting, gouged to death with McD’s coffee stirrers, I don’t care: just dead, the pair of em.

Throw in Louis Parraquat, for the trifecta…


Comment from Montenegro
Time: April 20, 2012, 7:25 pm

Ernest already taken so I’ll go with the six million dollar man Lee Majors.


Comment from Eirik
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:02 pm

Mickey Rooney


Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:05 pm

Goin’ with Clint Eastwood, since no one has grabbed his name yet.


Comment from EZnSF
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:16 pm

Robert Mugabe!


Comment from Crabby Old Bat
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:24 pm

Zsa Zsa Gabor, though it would be great if “Prince” Frederic von Anhalt went first.


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:28 pm

Reaching into the ether for another new name.

Last pick was someone harmless. Time to visit the rogues’ gallery. Haven’t been to the Hollywood wing for a while. Aha!

Roman Polanski


Comment from JC
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:38 pm

Jacques Barzun, international man of History


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:42 pm

Nina @April 20, 2012, 6:05 pm: Hugo!

Presumably Chavez, not Australian actor Hugo Weaving.

I was gonna call ambiguity and claim el Presidente canceroso, but I decided to be sporting.


Comment from J.S.Bridges
Time: April 20, 2012, 8:50 pm

Once again with that Red-Diaper Dummy In A Near-Solid-Blue State, rude an’ nasty ol’ Jane Fonda…

Everybody’s gotta go sometime, and she’s waaa-a-ay overdue.


Comment from Joan of Argghh!
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:00 pm

Assad.

BTW, your artwork is in the Dog Eater video here.


Comment from weaselwannabe
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:01 pm

Warren Buffet,for not paying his taxes.


Comment from RealMc
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:02 pm

Hosni Mubarak………


Comment from David Gillies
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:04 pm

As always, the one who is most responsible for bringing the UK to the sad pass it is currently in: J. Gordon Brown.


Comment from ZooomZooom
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:06 pm

Abe Vigoda


Comment from Clifford Skridlow
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:16 pm

I’m goint to go with Billy Graham. He’s already picked out a new suit and all . . .


Comment from Nina
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:23 pm

Yeah, Rich, fellow cancer sufferer Hugo Chavez, for whom I suspend my usual “wouldn’t wish it on my enemy” compassion in the interest in making the world a better place. I was leaning out of my classroom to get signal so I could beat out the rest of you rapscallions, had to be brief.

Make the planet a happier planet, Hugo!


Comment from Potato Bandit
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:27 pm

Chuck Berry.


Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:41 pm

George Soros (die already, you Nazi-collaborating, family-backstabbing bastard.)


Comment from Laughing Buddha
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:43 pm

I’m gonna try this guy again. Ronnie Biggs. He’s gotta give eventually.


Comment from Gulliblepratt
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:52 pm

Margaret Thatcher LG, OM, PC, FRS,
Not that theres anything wrong with her


Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:57 pm

Sorry Gulliblepratt, Mrs. Compton picked the Iron Lady way back at 6:02.


Comment from Monotone The Elderish
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:58 pm

Ruby Muhammad. She’s pushin’ 110


Comment from Vinnie Mc
Time: April 20, 2012, 9:58 pm

joe biden swallows own tongue for the win


Comment from BuckNutty
Time: April 20, 2012, 10:02 pm

Henry Kissinger


Comment from Janna
Time: April 20, 2012, 10:18 pm

Ruth Bader Ginsburg


Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 20, 2012, 10:23 pm

OK, I’m going for Nelson Mandella. Although that is likely to turn South Africa into a shitstorm when it happens….


Comment from Oh Hell
Time: April 20, 2012, 10:28 pm

Dick Cheney, just cause he got a new heart doesn’t mean the rest of him won’t crap out at any minute!


Comment from mandel bread
Time: April 20, 2012, 10:58 pm

Al Molinaro


Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:05 pm

Frederik Willem de Klerk of South Africa; after colon cancer, a triple by-pass and respiratory problems, he ain’t getting any stronger… Besides, Robin (Poor Robin) Gibb will beat everyone to the gate, anyway.


Comment from Spad13
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:18 pm

Dan Rather


Comment from Veeshir
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:21 pm

Charlie Sheen, he’s going to have a bunch of new sitcom money to blow on hookers, drugs and booze.


Comment from MrCaniac
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:26 pm

Well, this time I’m going in a little different and forgotten direction, this Pool’s pick, Herbert Lom. For those of you who are too young, he played Chief Inspector Dreyfus in the Pink Panther movies, not the cartoons. 95 years young. What Inspector Clouseau couldn’t do, time will.


Comment from Armybrat
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:27 pm

Helen Thomas. With so many deserving candidates, I like to think she’s in the upper teir of death deserving shitbirds.


Comment from Sven in Colorado
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:42 pm

James Earl Jones…..Lordy, I hope I am wrong! I will miss that voice and presence!!!


Comment from m
Time: April 20, 2012, 11:47 pm

Sen. Lautenberg


Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: April 21, 2012, 12:44 am

Armybrat: Oooo, GOOD choice!


Comment from PatAZ
Time: April 21, 2012, 12:53 am

Barney Frank … before the wedding.

I had no idea Herbert Lom was 95.


Comment from Davem123
Time: April 21, 2012, 1:30 am

I hate getting here this late. I’ll take Harry Reid for the greater good.


Comment from Cobrakai99
Time: April 21, 2012, 1:43 am

Jon Corzine. He’ll be found in the pine barrens. After “bundling” about $700 Million for the Obama camp.


Comment from Ben
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:14 am

I’m sticking with William Shatner.


Comment from unkawill
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:27 am

Nancy boy Barney frank


Comment from Ghost
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:36 am

Betty White. She’s been a hundred for thirty years now. It’s time.


Comment from catnip
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:44 am

Tony Martin, American singer/actor


Comment from Armybrat
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:45 am

Argentium Tiger….I confess, it was my husband shouting from behind me, with a few particularly vile words that turned me off (or rather “on”) to Helen. Truly an ogre, shame she’s stolen oxygen this long.


Comment from James the lesser
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:45 am

Since Mugabe is taken (twice) I’ll go with Hugh Hefner. I haven’t heard a thing in quite a while.


Comment from xul
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:57 am

Ray Harryhausen


Comment from Pavel
Time: April 21, 2012, 3:19 am

Etta James. (Which would make me sad. Roman Polanski would make me happy.)


Comment from little, little
Time: April 21, 2012, 3:37 am

Dean Ornish and his perfectly horrendous diet ideas for living long.


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: April 21, 2012, 5:13 am

What? No one, no one wants leftist kooks Jeremiah Wright,Harry Belafonte or douchebag Danny Glover? Really? Just suggesting some one pick these malodorous turds off the turdhook tree..

Any body? Bueller?Bueller?


Comment from Janna
Time: April 21, 2012, 6:31 am

Pavel,
Sit down, dear, I have some bad news….


Comment from Oceania
Time: April 21, 2012, 7:44 am

Radiation cloud detected in transit to Australia – eta 2-3 days.


Comment from S2
Time: April 21, 2012, 12:49 pm

Irwin Corey.


Comment from platypuss
Time: April 21, 2012, 1:51 pm

Ryan Oneal, and not a moment too soon.


Comment from naleta
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:08 pm

Yay, nobody beat me to Michael Moore!


Comment from thefritz
Time: April 21, 2012, 2:41 pm

Everybody’s favorite Moonie….Sun Myung Moon.


Comment from Stephen Falken
Time: April 21, 2012, 3:22 pm

George McGovern


Comment from Gromulin
Time: April 21, 2012, 3:24 pm

Protip: CTRL + F, type in name, if matches = zero then pretty good chance it hasn’t been picked yet.


Comment from Stigand
Time: April 21, 2012, 4:03 pm

Patty Andrews of the Andrews Sisters


Comment from J Foster
Time: April 21, 2012, 4:04 pm

Ed Asner.


Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: April 21, 2012, 5:15 pm

George Zimmerman, at the hands of an “avenger”; likely because either the media or the government “accidentally” reveal his location.

Subotai Bahadur


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: April 21, 2012, 6:53 pm

Monotone The Elderish @April 20, 2012, 9:58 pm:Ruby Muhammad. She’s pushin’ 110

No, she’s pushin’ up the daisies. Working on a second crop, in fact: dec. March 2, 2011.

Rule 0: your pick has to be alive.

BTW, she’d only be 105 if still breathing. NTT isn’t pretty good.


Comment from Andy
Time: April 21, 2012, 8:23 pm

I should check with Mrs. Peel first. She’s a pro.

But I’m going with Loretta Lynn.


Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: April 21, 2012, 10:56 pm

Comment from Pablo
Time: April 20, 2012, 6:05 pm

Levon Helm Chuck Colson!

.
Hey, Dude, yer gettin’ some dick! Aunty’s Spotted Dick! Congratulations!


Comment from sandman says nothing to see here
Time: April 21, 2012, 11:00 pm

Chuck Colson ate the big one this morning, so Pablo gets some well earned dick. Him and some Colombian hookers…

*congrats*


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 21, 2012, 11:55 pm

Please to be dicking me! Thanks, Chuck! Um, God bless ya!


Comment from Redd
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:07 am

Rich Rostrom: Forget it! He picks her every time.


Comment from Nina
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:08 am

Dang, we have to go through all this again on Friday?! 🙂


Comment from RushBabe
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:36 am

Congrats, Pablo. Did you have some inside info or what? That had to be a record for fastest dick evah!


Comment from Armybrat
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:48 am

Pablo, I just shot beer thru my nose!


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:51 am

Well, yeah, RushBabe. Colson was erroneously reported dead a few days ago. http://twitchy.com/2012/04/19/how-not-to-retract-a-false-story-cbn-scrubs-chuck-colson-obituary/ Sort of had me thinking of Monty Python’s not-yet-dead fellow in The Holy Grail.

This time, it’s for the dick!


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 22, 2012, 12:53 am

The pleasure is all mine, Armybrat.


Comment from JC
Time: April 22, 2012, 3:17 am

And now I have a whole week for my choices to die without doing me any good.
Me and Pancho and Lefty. That’s me in the corner.


Comment from Veeshir
Time: April 22, 2012, 4:13 am

Drudge had a headline up “Where’s Hugo?” or something.

While I wouldn’t shed a tear if he kicked the bucket, I would like to see someone win the dick for it.


Comment from Amiable Dorsai
Time: April 22, 2012, 4:27 am

Mikhail Timofeyevich Kalashnikov. Because it’s well past time.


Comment from unkawill
Time: April 22, 2012, 4:42 am

Well Crap! Since Someone already grabbed my first pick
I was going to take Harry Belafonte, on the excellent advice
of Sandman.
Congrats Pablo.


Comment from pizza
Time: April 22, 2012, 5:55 am

callin on michael moore. don’t think anyone said it yet… not checking either.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 22, 2012, 11:20 am

Oh, I assumed that was a cutesy Rule Zero pick. You picked him before he shuffled off, Pablo? Swearz?


Comment from ms anthrope
Time: April 22, 2012, 4:35 pm

Can’t tell if this round is still going; and since someone beat me to my “usual” (If twice counts as usual) I’ll pick Abe Vigoda. Not that I wish anyone’s death.


Comment from ms anthrope
Time: April 22, 2012, 4:40 pm

just found someone already picked Mr Vigoda_ next choice: Burt REynolds


Comment from steve
Time: April 22, 2012, 8:36 pm

Chuck Colson’s official date of death is 4/21…..

So it looks like a clean win for Pablo…


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 22, 2012, 10:26 pm

Well, then, congratulations Pablo and see you all here next week.

(Hey, when you positively encourage dirty tricks, you have to ask).


Comment from Oceania
Time: April 23, 2012, 6:44 am

Your Google execs – for fucking up the new look gmail badly … they must be Sacrificed.


Comment from Mr. Dave
Time: April 23, 2012, 12:35 pm

Ramsey Clark. I have to be right one of these days.


Comment from Mrs. Compton
Time: April 23, 2012, 2:27 pm

UGH, I hate when we have a quick one. A whole 5 days of a chance of loosing a pick!!


Comment from RushBabe
Time: April 23, 2012, 2:35 pm

I know what you mean, Mrs. Compton. There are four souls still above ground that look as if they left six months ago! Watch all of them go this week and leave us dickless. Not that we’re a bunch of ghouls or anything…


Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: April 23, 2012, 2:45 pm

I want James Hetfield dead.


Comment from Pavel
Time: April 23, 2012, 8:00 pm

Janna very kindly informed me of the passing of the golden-voiced Etta James. Last January, even, which makes her very dead indeed.

Ima pick Al Gore in that case; not that he is in failing health, or even particularly old. He is, however, a peculiarly detestable hypocrite and liar, which, if God is fair, which He totally is not, ought to put Algore next in line to feel the icy finger releasing his seventh chakra.


Comment from Pavel
Time: April 23, 2012, 8:03 pm

Daygonnit, Pablo. Could you at least have given me a chance to get my wrong pick in the hat before winning?


Comment from Pablo
Time: April 23, 2012, 8:44 pm

Oh, I assumed that was a cutesy Rule Zero pick. You picked him before he shuffled off, Pablo? Swearz?

Yep. He slipped the coil Saturday AM. Levon Helm was my cutesy Rule Zero pick, as he just couldn’t wait until Friday. Chuck was for the dick.

Was he a ringer? Oh, hells yes.


Comment from Davem123
Time: April 23, 2012, 9:03 pm

Here’s an interesting procedural question (at least to me, but I’m easily amused.) What if Venezuela announces that El Jefe Hugo has bitten the big one and admits that they’ve been holding out on the good news for a week or so? Shouldn’t the person who had his name in the pool at that time deserve their celebratory Dick? I think it would be a shame for them to miss out.

I would be willing to put in a buck or two to help cover the expense of an extra dick in that case.

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