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Lookit me! I’m a tree!

This is how I know it’s Chicken Bedtime: when they fly up and settle on my shoulder. It’s not because they love me, it’s because they are roosting birds and I’m the next best thing to a tree.

And no, thanks for asking, they don’t have little chickeny accidents very often. Let them hop down onto my keyboard and they let fly the chicken plop, but they haven’t decorated my shirt yet. They’re ladies.

I was going to go with Rachel Jeantel and her apologists tonight, but then I thought, “it’s the weekend. I don’t feel like having a conversation about race. Chikkens!!!”

And for the record, I’m pretty sure Nelson Mandela has snuffed it and they’re keeping his chest going up and down until Obama is ready to enter stage left, but I won’t call the Dead Pool until the official announcement. It is The Law. It’s okay; gulliblepratt’s dick is surely safe for a few more days.

Have a good weekend!


Comment from Skandia Recluse
Time: June 28, 2013, 11:33 pm

Oh ya, chicken deposits. I watched the Decorah Iowa eagles grow up last year and they’re good about aiming the dispenser in a safe direction, and I once watched a pigeon take extra steps to see to it that guano went over the edge. But I was working with a fellow on a project where we were going to climb a communications tower, and there were a lot of birds, and doing a preliminary visual inspection from ground level, and as looking up with your head back your mouth goes open, and ya it happened. What are the odds?

Comment from dissent555
Time: June 28, 2013, 11:33 pm

It’s okay; gulliblepratt’s dick is surely safe for a few more days.

Well, thank goodness for that.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: June 28, 2013, 11:44 pm

If bloody Obama “raises the dead” I will not be surprised.


Comment from twolaneflash
Time: June 29, 2013, 12:16 am

Has anyone seen Joe Biden? I believe he’s dead, too.

Comment from Paula Douglas
Time: June 29, 2013, 12:30 am

They are just way too cute like that, regardless of their motives.

A friend of mine has an African gray (named Dorian. Get it?) which she has trained to poop on command. Over a wastebasket. Chickens can be trained to play ping pong; surely they’d make poopie on request, if properly motivated? Then they’d be safe for, what, couple of minutes?

Comment from AliceH
Time: June 29, 2013, 1:59 am

So help me, I actually laughed at this:
Rare bird last spotted 22 years ago reappears then is quickly killed by wind turbine

(link goes to Gateway Pundit which quotes/links Daily Mail)

Doom. Oh – and happy weekend.

Comment from Paula Douglas
Time: June 29, 2013, 2:08 am

AliceH, I laughed my ass off when I saw that today. Sorry about the bird, poor thing, but it serves the eco-fascists right.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 29, 2013, 2:40 am

Rachel Jeantrel – prima facie evidence of an illicit coupling between a sumo wrestler and and Easter Island tiki goddess.

Either that or she’s a reincarnation of Angelfood McSpade (ref: R. Crumb).

Comment from weasel tablet
Time: June 29, 2013, 2:32 pm

Crumb would be arrested for some of those strips today. And I don’t mean the racial stuff.

Comment from ed
Time: June 29, 2013, 6:52 pm

Amazing isn’t it? A 19 year old *high school junior*, soon to be a 20 year old high school senior, who cannot read or write cursive.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: June 29, 2013, 9:19 pm

“Amazing isn’t it? A 19 year old *high school junior*, soon to be a 20 year old high school senior, who cannot read or write cursive.”

But, but, SHE wrote it!!!

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: June 30, 2013, 1:34 am

I’m annoyed by the apologists who say “you have to understand, she’s not racist, and she’s not changing her story; that’s just the way her culture works.” However Zimmerman, who merely used the descriptor, “Black” was instantly branded as a racist.

As for the fundamental facts of the case, I’ve been confused since the beginning. As I understand it, it’s clear there was a fight. If I was being followed by a creepy cracker and he was waving a gun, I don’t think I would hit him in self-defense. I’d put my hands up. Alternately, if Zimmerman intended to shoot him, I don’t think he would jump on Martin first. I can’t see any reasonable scenario in which Martin did not attack Zimmerman first. Perhaps I’m missing something though. Still, it seems to me that the Prosecution’s fundamental argument is that Zimmerman should have taken his beating like a man.

Please correct me where I’m wrong.

P.S. I denounce myself, to save time.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: June 30, 2013, 9:53 am

Thought experiment: if Honey Boo Boo’s mom was the star witness in a murder trial, and she made a total mess of her testimony, how far would you be willing to defend her on the grounds, y’all wouldn’t understand, it’s a white thang?

Comment from weasel tablet
Time: June 30, 2013, 10:46 am

Oh, and I concur, some veg. An armed man doesn’t start a fistfight. Does not compute.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 30, 2013, 12:25 pm

RE: thought experiment.

How far? About as far as I could throw Michael Moore.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: June 30, 2013, 4:41 pm

Split Atoms, not birds!

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: June 30, 2013, 6:08 pm

Oh, man, this is what happens when you don’t beat your kids.

Comment from bastiches
Time: June 30, 2013, 7:24 pm

Some Veg,

For what it’s worth, police had Zimmerman to return to the scene the next day and record a vid tape description of the events. All without a lawyer present.


Comment from tomfrompv
Time: July 1, 2013, 2:33 am

Thankfully, the media hasn’t stooped (yet) to Rodney King style reporting. You know, when all of LA got re-runs of the cops beating on King but NO MENTION of why. The riots were the result of that media lynching.

I fear Zimmerman may well get Manslaughter, not because he shoukd, but because those 6 good women don’t want a riot on their conscience. The LA version ended up killing 60+ people, all bystanders who didn’t deserve it.

And lets not forget Holder and the JustUs Department! He can file all kinds of charges if the jury doesn’t convict.

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: July 1, 2013, 9:43 am

I believe the media has stooped to the RK reporting. If they had the video of TM being shot during a struggle, they’d cut right to the Skittles in his dead hand. They don’t, so they keep showing the pre-teen photo of TM over and over and over.
I pray that Zimmerman gets a Duke lacrosse team day in civil court.

Comment from TBinSTL
Time: July 1, 2013, 4:07 pm

If only there was a Zombie Sadat campaign we could rally around….

Comment from GIL, formerly Mark
Time: July 1, 2013, 5:11 pm

Wanted to say hi, Sweas & UB: hot enough over there w/ the chickies? I started day-dreaming the other day and decided an Alaskan cruise ship might be kind of nice this time of the year. Then the electricity ran out on the meter and had to be topped up. Oh, well. Instead, I made us cups of tea and we went over to the dog park at 7:30 on a Sat morning. All the nice people chided me for not bringing a flask. Inner city parks up here ARE nice! They should be! Glenda ain’t gonna live in no dump, is she now? Heh.

Comment from mojo
Time: July 1, 2013, 8:06 pm

Jim Kelly (JIM KELLY!) has left the building.

Anybody call that one?

Comment from scottthebadger
Time: July 1, 2013, 9:00 pm

With Jim Kelly gone, is there any way to protect gullibleprat’s dick? Mr. Mandela is nt long for this world, and gullibleprat did get in first.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 1, 2013, 9:17 pm

Well, but, contra my cynicism, it looks like Mandela isn’t dead after all. Or so it would seem. When’s Obama due back in the country?

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