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Damien sez: more global warming, please


February 26, 2007 — 5:06 pm
Comments: 2

Shall we play a game?

I read a lot of True Crime. The first thing I do when I pick up a TC title is page to the middle and look at the pictures. Then, not knowing anything about the story, I play a game I call “Victim, Perp or Copper?” You know, look at the faces, not the captions, and see if I can tell who’s who in the melodrama.

Most murders involve lowlifes who kill other lowlifes, but those don’t tend to have books written about them. Unless it’s a serial killer of the hooker-slaying variety. So, you know, just because the picture is a mugshot, doesn’t mean it’s not a victim.

It’s axiomatic that murderers don’t look like the monsters they are, but it ain’t necessarily so. Some murderers do us all a favor and look explicitly batshit insane.

“Is the man you saw in this lineup?”

“Yes, sir. That’s the man. The hunchback with the pentagram tattoo. The one singing ‘I’m a Little Teapot’ while driving a salad fork into his temple. I never forget a piece of silverware.”

White collar mayhem is a little harder to pin down. Nice people keep their batshit crazy on the inside.

The three people pictured here are all Britons. Brits have a very low murder rate, but they make up for it in quality. British murders are either very twisted or weirdly pointless (well, not today — it’s mostly drug dealers shooting it out these days).

So, let’s play a short round of “Victim, Perp or Copper,” shall we? These three people are from three different incidents. I flipped through Ye Giante Booke of Murther and picked three that (as you may have guessed) look nothing like what they are.

When you’ve made up your mind who’s who, click on each picture to find the answer.

Hm. Okay. This one works in Opera and IE, but not Firefox. Also, it looks like the code change I made to the Milkworld post causes FF to lose its shit completely from there on down. The logs tell me a surprising amount of traffic is using Safari. Is that Mac? Linux? Is it working in that? When you click a picture, does it change? Testing the script is kind of what I’m up to here. It’s a javascript. Perhaps I should stick to PHP.

— 6:31 am
Comments: 11