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Jack thinks it’s awesome we brought a tree in for him to sleep under, but he’s a little concerned for our mental health. Also, what’s up with all the twinkly lights?

This’ll be my Christmas Eve and Christmas Day offering, so lemme know what Sandy Claws brings you in this thread. Merry Christmas, folks!


Comment from mojo
Time: December 24, 2014, 8:21 pm

Waiting for a squirrel to show up.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: December 24, 2014, 8:24 pm

Merry Christmas fellow minions!

Now, where did I put that cognac bokkle? 🙂

Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: December 24, 2014, 9:05 pm

You can imagine my disappointment when I read that his name was not Newton.

Merry Xmas Stoaty & Badger & all !

Comment from CrabbyOldBat
Time: December 24, 2014, 9:14 pm

mojo: Waiting for a squirrel to show up.

There he is:

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: December 24, 2014, 10:05 pm

Happy Christmas!!

Comment from Oceania
Time: December 24, 2014, 10:52 pm

Prince Harry, the Little Ginger Bastard!

Comment from Nina
Time: December 24, 2014, 11:15 pm

I’m in Norway, which is gift enough. And since it’s after midnight, Merry Christmas!

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: December 24, 2014, 11:46 pm

Jack: “Look deep into my eyes. Deep…deep… You are getting calmer…calmer… Breathe in…hold a second…now exhale. Beginning with your fingers and toes, and coursing upward to your heart and soul, feel the Christmas Joy infuse your whole being.”

Now, show Jack’s picture to everyone who will sit still for a few minutes!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all.

Uncle Al

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: December 24, 2014, 11:55 pm

I managed to get a nasty cold for Christmas! Thanks, Santa, you elf-raping, diabetic sack of poo.

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: December 25, 2014, 12:22 am

Merry Christmas everyone!

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: December 25, 2014, 1:54 am

Mad Jack looks satisfied! and a bit possessive, too. He must really love that tree.
I guess all the mustelids are tucked into bed (visions of sugar plums … ).
So—Good Morning, and Merry Christmas to Badger House!
Merry Christmas to all Stoaty and Uncle Badger’s friends 🙂

Comment from Anonymous
Time: December 25, 2014, 2:33 am

Not. Done. Yet. Zzzzzzzz……

Comment from jwm
Time: December 25, 2014, 3:02 am

I am in awe of your cat pictures. My pal Buddy, the incredible posing cat, sets me up damn near every day. OOOO I gotta get a shot of that! And by the time I get the camera- bleah- nothing. I’ve wasted countless zillions of pixels in the attempt. Good thing they’re cheap- pixels, that is.


Comment from Some Pickled Vegetable
Time: December 25, 2014, 5:42 am

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring – they were all much too soused
Empty bottles and cans were strewn there and here
But there were hopes that fresh drinks soon would appear

And out in the driveway there arose such a clatter
That car mechanics for miles wondered what was the matter
A carb or bad battery, a holed muffler, and a starter gear chattering
Those problems were all present and more – and not just a smattering
But on a 56 Caddy such things are expected
Especially when that old sled’s been neglected.

When Stoaty got to her feet and opened one eyeball
She looked outside just in time to see some old fat drunk fall
Grandly laying a finger to one side of his nose,
He sniffed up some snow and somehow he rose.

Mumbling, “Got Vodka, got Tonic, got Gin and Vermouth”,
“Got Scotch Whiskey, Tequila, and Schnapps – Hundred Proof.”
“Got Budweiser, some Guiness, Bass Ale, and Corona”
Potato Chips, Pretzels, Rye Bread and Bologna.

He was shouting, “Come help me you bastards, com’on and get out here!”
When from inside the house there arose an impressively loud cheer:
“Good ol Santa’s rescued Weasel’s party again this Christmas!”
“She never predicted her minions could drink this much“.

Uncle Badger raised his Scotch glass and shouted with great might:
“Damn your bloody old eyes Santa, this is a bit of alright!”
He turned to the minions, and all raised their beers,
Shouting,” Merry Christmas, Weas and Badger, and a Happy New Year!”

Comment from gromulin
Time: December 25, 2014, 6:23 am

Merry Christmas! Good storm offshore here, good swell expected. Kids getting their own surfboard and longboard. Should be fun! Or Hospitals! Either way, sunny and memorable. What more can you ask for?

Comment from AltBBrown
Time: December 25, 2014, 11:37 am

Merry Christmas to all!!

Comment from BJM
Time: December 25, 2014, 3:21 pm

@Some Pickled Veg


Merry Christmas to all!

Comment from Skandia Recluse
Time: December 25, 2014, 6:13 pm

Happy Holidays and good cheer to all who hang out here.
Including the most personable cat.

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 25, 2014, 8:13 pm

Merry Christmas, you guys! I got a toilet seat and a box of Premium saltines! (And some other great stuff).

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: December 25, 2014, 9:02 pm

That Uncle Badger! What a sweetie—He knows what a girl wants. I love Premium Saltines. As a child, one of my favorite treats was leftover chocolate buttercream icing on saltine crackers.

Topping my list of Christmas treasures is a painting done by my 11-year old granddaughter of Joseph, Mary and Baby Jesus in the manger, and a 4-lb! Collin Street Bakery fruit cake from her parents.

Tonight for supper Husband and I will have fruitcake, and hot toddies made the first lemon off my Meyer Lemon tree.

Comment from Some vegetable
Time: December 25, 2014, 9:22 pm

Mrs.Vegetable is now the (happy?) owner of a remote control electric rattle snake. So far it is scaring the HELL out of those pigeons that were bothering the bird feeder!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 25, 2014, 11:14 pm

Saltines are really hard to find here. The ones I can get are Italian, and they’re okay but they’re kind of…harder and heavier than saltines I’m used to.

Premium saltines, believe it or don’t, are imported and screamingly expensive.

Comment from Mrs Compton
Time: December 25, 2014, 11:56 pm

I got a Squatty Potty!

Comment from Armybrat
Time: December 26, 2014, 12:56 am

I got a cold…oh yeah, and a diamond tennis braclet. I feel miserable, but I’ve got some nice bling to look at. Oh… And I work the next 4 days. Just shoot me now.

Comment from Simon Oliver Lockwood
Time: December 26, 2014, 1:36 am

One of our cats made herself a little nest among all of our daughter’s presents last night. Another one planted herself on one of the bigger presents. Now that daughter has opened every possible permutation of “Frozen” toys (including Anna & Elsa in three different scales), the cats are wondering where all the cool stuff disappeared to.

Comment from Simon Oliver Lockwood
Time: December 26, 2014, 1:39 am

So about saltines–or the lack there of–in Britain. Do you have crackers with soup over there? Or is that just an American quirk?

Comment from mojo
Time: December 26, 2014, 2:46 am

Clothes. I always get clothes.

Nobody ever gives me an Imodium-Q Space Modulator…

Comment from Anonymous
Time: December 26, 2014, 8:10 am

Lazarus, my Norwegian Forest cat, believed in sharing my pillow with me. He also believed in making a round trip up the tree every day in December. Man, that cat smelled good!

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 26, 2014, 11:58 am

No, they don’t eat crackers with soup, and that’s the rub. I love soup. I eat a lot of soup. I have a cup of it every morning first thing, instead of coffee. AND I WANT IT WITH SALTINES, dammit.

The Italian ones are good enough to soak in soup, but it sure is nice to have a box of good old Premium Saltines.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: December 26, 2014, 4:59 pm

My son was stationed in the U.K. and used to joke about boot-legging zip-lock bags into the U.K. (which could not be bought there in the early 90s). He was on an RAF base, but there was a store (and restaurant) for the American personnel only—he bought boxes of zip-lock bags, grape jelly, and 5-lb bags of Ore-Ida Tater Tots for his friends. I guess the subject of crackers never came up.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: December 26, 2014, 5:43 pm

In case anyone is wondering how Our Leader is spending Her afternoon at this special time of the year, when peace and goodwill to all men is said to be paramount in our minds.

Her Stoatliness currently has her nose pressed to the screen, her claws are rattling like demented crickets on a game controller and the air is filled with the cries and screams of the maimed and dying.

Business as usual in the mustelid household, in other words.

Happy Boxing Day! 🙂

Comment from gromulin
Time: December 26, 2014, 5:51 pm

Saltines and a ripe avocado. If the avocado is just right it’ll sqwoosh through the little holes when you squeeze the crackers together. Doesn’t get any better than that.

And soup without saltines? Barbarism.

Happy boxing day!

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: December 26, 2014, 7:24 pm

Try substituting a grillt ham & cheese sandwich for the saltines.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: December 26, 2014, 10:48 pm

Oops, forgot the Sandy Claws report.

I got a knee. The left one. Plus one hella scar.

Recovery is going according to plan, perhaps just a bit faster than is normal for a 65-yr-old. It hurts like hell, but that’s a normal/expected part of that damned plan. Hydrocodone plus a smidgen of ethanol work well but I have to be cautious about dosage or I’ll forget where I parked my walker (OK, OK, “Zimmer frame” for you on Zulu time).

Comment from mojo
Time: December 27, 2014, 1:11 am

Hello. Jack’s the name, Jack T. Cat.

I haven’t seen you in here before, new in town? Sit down, let me buy you a drink…

Comment from dissent555
Time: December 27, 2014, 4:26 am

Cheery holiday greetings to Teh Mustelid Abode. And Mad Jack. And the feathered ones. I hear there is some winter headed your way. Stay safe and stay warm.

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: December 27, 2014, 6:24 am

Santa left me a SIG Sauer 1911 in .22lr, so it can be shot economically.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: December 27, 2014, 11:34 am

Now that is what I call a Christmas present, cousin, Scott! 🙂

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: December 27, 2014, 2:57 pm

Not as far south as us. We’re getting below freezing, but no snow.

I meant to post last night but got distracted. Oh, well…we can keep at this thread for the weekend. If you have anything further to report.

Comment from JuliaM
Time: December 27, 2014, 4:19 pm

Ahhh, a real tree! We haven’t had one (that wasn’t a foot tall) since we got first the two Siamese sisters, then the SiaBengal, then took in a very young stray black & white cat. All mad climbers…

Hope you had a great Christmas. Wishing you a Happy New Year in advance 🙂

Comment from JuliaM
Time: December 27, 2014, 4:22 pm

“So about saltines–or the lack there of–in Britain.”

Imagine my shock when a trip to Tesco today to restock showed that, amongst the little ‘Thai/Polish/African’ sections, there was one headed ‘American’.

Hershey’s Peanut butter, grits (!) and something called ‘marshmallow fluff’. No Saltines, though.

Comment from dissent555
Time: December 27, 2014, 5:35 pm

Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff sandwiches on Wonder bread.

Welcome to the dark side.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: December 27, 2014, 5:52 pm

Funny thing is, I remember Saltines, so they must have been available in my yoof.

No cracks about an intervening war of indepence, please! 🙂

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: December 27, 2014, 8:09 pm

@Uncle Badger – All right then: no cracks about 1775-1783. But aren’t Saltines just a lighter version (and without the vermin) of the hardtack you ate in the War of 1812?

Merry Christmas a fellow geezer!

Comment from Nina
Time: December 28, 2014, 12:08 am

I have had FIVE christmas dinners with assorted family since I got here on Monday. Five. None were what you’d call “diet” or “healthy” meals, either. We have another Sunday, and a party on Wednesday night.

Our little walk along the frozen fjord today was not enough to offset all of that, I tell you, even without saltines.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: December 28, 2014, 12:47 am

The ones I can get are Italian, and they’re okay but they’re kind of…harder and heavier than saltines I’m used to.

It may be worth the effort to help those Italian crackers along a little. Spread the top with butter, sprinkle on a little extra coarse salt if called for, and apply a little top radiant heat – toaster oven or broiler – briefly. Just a touch of browning and you’re done.

And for goodness’s sake, don’t put any marshmallow or frosting on them. That’s what shortbread’s for! (Just kidding. Put whatever you like on them in your own personal Pursuit of Happiness!)

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: December 28, 2014, 9:16 am

Uncle Badger, for my birthday, back in August, I bought myself a SIG P-250 in .45ACP. But it is expensive to shoot, hence Santa’s Kindness. The P-250, since it was my Birthday Present, is, of course, named Precious!

Comment from armybrat
Time: December 28, 2014, 2:02 pm

I bought my husband an M1 Garand for Christmas. Springfield Armory, 1943 from the serial number. He may just keep me another 34 years!

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: December 28, 2014, 6:05 pm

[i]grits (!)[/i]

Alabama polenta!

Comment from ed
Time: December 29, 2014, 12:03 pm

Being the lazy sot that I am I love the sausage shaped packages of pre-cooked polenta. I slice them into thick rounds and pan fry them in some of the fat left over after cooking bacon until they are crispy on both sides but still creamy in the center. Then top each with an egg over easy with the yolk cooked a bit but viscous with salt, pepper and some hot sauce.

sigh. It’s almost impossible to get around here in New Jersey. As far as I know no restaurant in my area does them this way. Mores the pity.

Comment from ed
Time: December 29, 2014, 12:21 pm

BTW you know you can buy Nabisco saltines from Amazon UK right?


Comment from Lazlo
Time: December 29, 2014, 2:45 pm

That Cat is a repeat offender. I see it in his eye.
That is the kind of Cat I could drink with.

Comment from Wolfus Aurelius
Time: December 30, 2014, 10:15 pm

A little late to this thread; I haven’t checked the Internet for anything for a couple of days. I’m glad to see that the Uncle Badger-Stoaty Weasel-Mad Jack household is merry.

I took Miss Linda to a very nice, and expensive, restaurant for Xmas Eve. She keeps insisting I should buy a fresh water fountain for my two furry thugs. She: “They want a fountain.” Me: “How can they? They don’t know what a fountain is!”

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: December 31, 2014, 4:08 am

He is a handsome beastie, he is!

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