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A question for the marrieds


Another from the inn I posted about yesterday. All my flash photography looks shit but sharp, all my hand-held shots are lit like old masters’ but shaky and out of focus. But if you want to see that thing in all its glory, here you go (yes, this four poster has a ceiling to it, and yes it’s carved, too).

Weird question. Someone in one of my FaceBook groups said he’d done an informal survey of his married co-workers (goodness knows what made him think of it), 90% of whom said that the woman sleeps on the left side of the bed and the man on the right. That is, as you stand at the foot of the bed facing the headboard, she is L and he is R.

It’s true of Onkle B and me. It’s true of these two in this 17th C bed. How’s about you?


Comment from Hutch
Time: January 19, 2017, 9:56 pm

Mrs. Hutch always sleeps on the side of the bed closest to the TV wherever we are. At our house this the right side.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: January 19, 2017, 9:56 pm

I’m on the right, she’s on the left…currently. Since we were married we’ve lived in six houses and in some of them it was the other way around. It mostly has to do with the way the bedroom furniture is arranged: we each are closer to the chest or bureau containing our own clothes. It just seems scandalously improper to commingle my boxer briefs and her panties in the same drawer!

Comment from Syracuse1989
Time: January 19, 2017, 10:24 pm

In this house, girl on the left and boy on right. Always been that way.

Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: January 19, 2017, 10:26 pm

Well, I sleep on the left, and Mrs. Bahadur sleeps on the right. But that is based on the fact that it is closer to the phone, door, and incidentally access to firearms. I am generally the one who handles situations requiring a response to any of them in the middle of the night.

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: January 19, 2017, 10:56 pm

The guy sleeps closest to the door so when armed intruders burst in, he gets it first. 🙂

Comment from Ben
Time: January 19, 2017, 11:07 pm

I’m on the left, she’s on the right.

Comment from Niña
Time: January 19, 2017, 11:52 pm

I’m not married, but I prefer the right.

Comment from Bob B
Time: January 20, 2017, 12:08 am

Mrs. B sleeps closest to the bathroom. In this house that’s on the right.

Comment from Fritzworth
Time: January 20, 2017, 12:13 am

Yep. Been married twice; in both prior & current marriages, I’m on the right (per your description).

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: January 20, 2017, 12:20 am

Hey, Ace of Spades is doing a real time re-inactment of election night. He’s posted all these media tapes and you have to comment as if in that time period. Since I dont have tv and was busy following it on the net, it’s nice to see all the media coverage and enjoy the tears. 🙂

Comment from RimrockR
Time: January 20, 2017, 12:22 am

Ric Fan’s observation matches my experience. I am the wife and always am on the side furthest from the bedroom door – which in the current house is on the right side. The dogs are on the floor at the foot of the bed so I have a reasonable chance of escaping any intruder.

Comment from RealMc
Time: January 20, 2017, 12:42 am

She’s a lefty, I’m a righty and it’ll be 28 years in March……

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: January 20, 2017, 1:08 am

@Ric Fan et al
Have you seen this hilarious exchange between Rick Perry & Al Franken? It’s epic:

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: January 20, 2017, 1:26 am


Comment from feynmangroupie
Time: January 20, 2017, 1:30 am

Much as I love dark stained wood, it does make me wonder why it was so prevalent in other centuries and why it has gotten progressively lighter. I would assume that it had to do with the availability of natural stains from berries and such, but I wonder if it was just a trend.

Comment from Armybrat
Time: January 20, 2017, 2:38 am

I’m on the right, he’s on the left, always, even when we travel. Been that way for 37 years now, don’t see any reason to change things up now.

Comment from bds
Time: January 20, 2017, 2:44 am

Re: the darkness of the wood, some is probably fashion, but some is due to age and the finish. Oil finishes soak into the wood, as opposed to modern finishes which mostly dry on top of it. Even pine looks a fair bit darker when wet, which is how the oil looks. Most woods naturally darken as they age also (not to mention years of grime, polishing oils, waxes,etc), so these pieces of furniture probably were noticeably lighter when they were new.

As for sleeping arrangements, it’s always been me on the left & the missus on the right. I think that was the side closest to the door in our first residence, and now the other way round seems odd.

Comment from Bob B
Time: January 20, 2017, 3:01 am

Off topic: I was browsing the Innertubes and came across this. It’s not exactly a chicken, it’s the Chinese Red Pheasant with the Trump coiffure. A quick google shows this is normal (the bird, not my taste).
This bird should be officially renamed the Trump Pheasant in time for Chinese New Year. http://www.haaretz.com/world-news/americas/1.753566

Comment from Ccs
Time: January 20, 2017, 4:00 am

I sleep on the left she sleeps on the right. In our first house it put me closer the ac vent to block the cold air from directly hitting her.

Comment from Davem123
Time: January 20, 2017, 5:00 am

She’s on the left and I’m on the right, through five different residences. It’s always so that I’m closest to the door.

Now here’s the chicken\egg question – is that coincidence, or have we unconsciously arranged the furniture to make it so?

Comment from Nina
Time: January 20, 2017, 5:23 am

I sleep on the right (where I am right now, actually) because I sleep mostly on my left side (an artifact from my first pregnancy when it was more comfortable) and like to be able to hang appendages out of the covers to thermoregulate. I like to face the bathroom, too, which in my present house I do.

It looks like I’m the only single weasel fan, though!

Comment from BJM
Time: January 20, 2017, 6:00 am

We too seem to arrange ourselves so the SU sleeps nearer the door. I like to think he is protecting me, but in reality he likes the draft and I do not.

Our bed is a modern Italian sleigh bed, with reclining leather headrests and sliding side tables that can swing over the bed as a bed tray (which is great for laptops and such). Anyhoo, it works best in the middle of the room not against a wall. So we’re sort of unanchored in a traditional bed sense.

In the summer we turn the bed 180 degrees to take full advantage of the ceiling fan and cross window ventilation. Which means I’m on the left in the winter and on the right in the summer. So, my answer is both left and right!

And because it never gets old: Hillary Clinton will never be president.

Comment from tinman
Time: January 20, 2017, 6:16 am

We are she-left/he-right now, but were the opposite until a few years ago. Can’t recall for the life of me why we swapped.

Comment from gromulin
Time: January 20, 2017, 6:29 am

Well, you folks drive on the wrong side of the road too. I’m port, she’s starboard. Like it’s supposed to be.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: January 20, 2017, 2:17 pm

In the early years, Husband and I swapped sides for all the usual reasons previously listed. We bought our first house in our 9th year of marriage, and I took the left side and he took the right. It has remained that way ever since.

It does make me wonder if there is a genetic default that makes the man want his fighting arm free or up.

Comment from Wolfus Aurelius
Time: January 20, 2017, 2:25 pm


You’re not alone. I’ve been married (x 2), and in both cases I slept on the right of the bed and on my left side. Nothing unusual about that, as I did that growing up — facing that way kept me from being bothered by the light from the living room downstairs.

Comment from Mad Ivan
Time: January 20, 2017, 3:51 pm

Just the reverse for myself and Mrs. Mad – she sleeps on the right-hand side by strong preference.

We even (usually) do that in alternative bedding (visits to parent’s houses, hotels, etc.)

I have no idea why this is so, but it has been this way for nearly 30 years. Works for me.

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: January 20, 2017, 4:51 pm

Sexy gossip about the late great Sir Patrick Moore:

Unbuckling Orion’s Belt

http://blindgossip.com/?p=83100 😮

Personally, I dont believe it.

Comment from OldFert
Time: January 20, 2017, 7:20 pm

Mrs Fert is usually on the left, but that’s because that side is closer to the bathroom. It’s been that way for a long time, though when we started out I was on the left, closer to both the door and the phone. Now it’s been her-left, me-right for so long that when we change out (visiting or motel or whatever) it seems almost unnatural.
We’re retired now, so she has the phone, too.
I’m closer to the door.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: January 20, 2017, 8:31 pm

True in our house.
At least on the evenings I don’t have to chase the danes off my side.

English types probably understand that whole bit of chasing danes off eh?

(Before we wuz durnedyankees in Texas, I admit, we wuz DurnedNormans in Ireland, but we wuz never Danes in England!)

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: January 20, 2017, 9:03 pm

Well, that’s another fine theory that just didn’t pan out.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: January 20, 2017, 9:32 pm

It’s okay, Hillary still won’t ever be President.

Comment from harbqll
Time: January 21, 2017, 3:40 am

I’m on the right, and Mrs Bqll is on the left.

However, I remember my parents being the other way round.

Comment from Retired Spook
Time: January 23, 2017, 2:00 am

I’m on the left, she’s on the right, because I’m left-handed, and I sleep on my right side, thus am better able to access the household “turn to and repel boarders” tools that are on my side of the bed, and give The Boss ample time (hopefully) to get her part of the arsenal into play.

Comment from bikeboy
Time: January 23, 2017, 9:45 pm

I’m on the right, she’s on the left.

She’s closest to the door.

Reasons for the man to be closest to the door:
– (possible) intruder response
Reasons for the woman to be closer to the door:
– (certain) the bathroom is through the door
– (certain) the young ‘uns are through the door (Our young ‘uns were always happier to see Mom than Dad, if issues arose overnight.)

If she didn’t like it, I’d likely aquiesce without a complaint, or without her needing to organize a Women’s March.

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