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Dead Pool Round 97: Zsa Zsa Gabor Still Dead

I’m a very, very deep sleeper. When I was younger, I tried all sorts of strategies to wake me up of a morning. For a while, I used my bedroom television on a timer tuned to a news station.

One night, I had the most intensely vivid dream that Maggie Thatcher and I were sitting together in a rowboat watching Panama City burn.

I can still see the firelight flickering across the locks of her wooden hair.

It was the invasion of Panama, of course, and I was mixing news reports with dreams.

And now the commenter Formerly known as Skeptic takes the dick with Manuel Noriega.

Let that be a lesson to us all.


0. Rule Zero (AKA Steve’s Rule): your pick has to be living when picked. Also, nobody whose execution date is circled on the calendar. Also, please don’t kill anybody. Plus (Pupster’s Rule) no picking someone who’s only famous for being the oldest person alive.

1. Pick a celebrity. Any celebrity — though I reserve the right to nix picks I never heard of (I don’t generally follow the Dead Pool threads carefully, so if you’re unsure of your pick, call it to my attention).

2. We start from scratch every time. No matter who you had last time, or who you may have called between rounds, you have to turn up on this very thread and stake your claim.

3. Poaching and other dirty tricks positively encouraged.

4. Your first choice sticks. Don’t just blurt something out, m’kay? Also, make sure you have a correct spelling of your choice somewhere in your comment. These threads get longish and I use search to figure out if we have a winner.

5. It’s up to you to search the thread and make sure your choice is unique. I’m waayyyy too lazy to catch the dupes. Popular picks go fast.

6. The pool stays open until somebody on the list dies. Feel free to jump in any time. Noobs, strangers, drive-bys and one-comment-wonders — all are welcome.

7. If you want your fabulous prize, you have to entrust me with a mailing address. If you’ve won before, send me your address again. I don’t keep good records.

8. The new DeadPool will begin 6pm WBT (Weasel’s Blog Time) the Friday after the last round is concluded.

The winner, if the winner chooses to entrust me with a mailing address, will receive an Official Certificate of Dick Winning and a small original drawing on paper suffused with elephant shit particles. Because I’m fresh out of fairy shit particles.


Comment from Hutch
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:01 pm

Olivia de havilland

Comment from Janna
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:01 pm

Kirk Douglas

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:04 pm

I re-nominate:
George Herbert Walker Bush
1) He is way old enough;
2) He has already had two close calls in rapid succession;
3) Democrats need another thing to accuse Trump of deflection.

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:14 pm

Nicolás Maduro Moros – The best damned advertisement for free market capitalism alive today.

Things have been heating up in Venezuela for some time and it is now very, very hot. Somebody’s gonna git that hijo de puta.

Comment from Formerly known as Skeptic
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:19 pm

Back to Hugh Hefner if you please.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:20 pm

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi

Comment from kwan3217
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:39 pm

Bob Barker

Comment from Ben
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:46 pm

William Shatner

Comment from AliceH
Time: June 2, 2017, 6:54 pm

Robert Mugabe

Comment from RushBabe
Time: June 2, 2017, 7:07 pm

Once more, into the breach. Rev Billy Graham. And I don’t want to win.

Comment from tonycc
Time: June 2, 2017, 7:11 pm

George Soros (an American can wish can’t they?)

Comment from gebrauchshund
Time: June 2, 2017, 7:22 pm

Jerry Lewis, comic genius.

Comment from dustoffmom
Time: June 2, 2017, 7:30 pm

I’ll give Henry Kissinger another go!

Comment from Jeff Weimer
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:03 pm

Glenn Campbell, again. He’s not doing well at all.

Comment from Deborah HH
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:07 pm

Maria Teresa Thierstein Simões-Ferreira Heinz Kerry

Comment from RimrockR
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:07 pm

Chuck Yeager again

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:10 pm

As always, someone new, and this one is a dandy.

Composer George Walker, the first black to win a Pulitzer prize for classical music.

Comment from Mitchell
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:19 pm

That POS Kim Jung Un – I’m hoping for a coup.

Comment from sassamon
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:32 pm

Peter Sallis, actor who played Clegg, for all 31 years of the hit british tv comedy “Last of the Summer Wine”. Also the voice of Wallace of the “Wallace & Gromit” claymation films from Aardman.
Hope I lose.

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:38 pm

Miriam Moskowitz

Comment from ea in ga
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:39 pm

Bob Dole

Comment from Carl
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:49 pm

Sir Bruce Forsyth

Comment from Mrs Carl
Time: June 2, 2017, 8:50 pm

Clive James

Comment from RealMc
Time: June 2, 2017, 9:12 pm

Clint Eastwood Punk.

Comment from Anonymous
Time: June 2, 2017, 9:33 pm

Shouldn’t that be:
Clint Eastwood, punk.

Comment from dissent
Time: June 2, 2017, 9:38 pm

Ima poach Bill Clinton this time.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: June 2, 2017, 9:45 pm

I notice no one ever dares to choose Chuck Norris.

Not that I’m choosing Chuck Norris you understand.
I’m just saying, because I don’t want him to send a couple of lads round to my place, chain me to the back of their tank, and take me for a scrape round to his to explain myself, it’s a long way up to Oklahoma from where I live.

Comment from Timbo
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:03 pm

Hillary R Clinton

Comment from gulliblepratt
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:05 pm

HEH Prince Phillip

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:07 pm

It’s Larry King!

Comment from weaselwannabe
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:13 pm

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Comment from Timothy S. Carlson
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:17 pm

Gene Hackman, because he’s old (87) and I haven’t picked him before.

Comment from Veeshir
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:37 pm

Darnit, I was going to poach Bill, then poach Hillary but they’ve been taken.
They both look really rough these days.

Okay…uhhh… a new choice.
Ed Asner!

Comment from Spad13
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:50 pm

Jimmy Carter

Comment from uncle grizzly
Time: June 2, 2017, 10:54 pm

June Foray – The voice of Rocket J. Squirrel….

Comment from Eirik
Time: June 2, 2017, 11:13 pm

Damn, both my regular picks were taken. I’ll go for Betty White.

Comment from Crabby Old Bat
Time: June 2, 2017, 11:27 pm

Carol Channing

Comment from thefritz
Time: June 2, 2017, 11:41 pm

Gordon Bowker co-founder of Starbucks. He’s 96.

Comment from Capt. Kranky
Time: June 2, 2017, 11:45 pm

Dick Van Dyke he’s married to a younger woman and she will eventually kill him I’m sure.

Comment from p2
Time: June 3, 2017, 12:03 am

way late….. got george the first poached soima gonna grab his missus barbara bush… cuz shes old too

Comment from Subotai Bahadur
Time: June 3, 2017, 12:32 am

I’m picking the blogger Kim Dotcom, due to his inconvenient mentioning of details around the death of Democrat operative Seth Rich, who apparently let loose all those classified bits and pieces that the Democrats wanted hidden forever. Or at least as forever as they could be when locked behind the password, “password”. Democrats have a habit of committing Arkancide when their crimes might be mentioned.

Comment from Armybrat
Time: June 3, 2017, 1:05 am

Desmond Tutu

Comment from David Gillies
Time: June 3, 2017, 1:47 am

Still Gordon “Texture Like Sun” Brown. Maybe a Corbynista will eat him.

Comment from Davem123
Time: June 3, 2017, 1:47 am

Bill Cosby. Lots of stress on that old man right about now.

Comment from catnip
Time: June 3, 2017, 5:56 am

Architect, I.M. Pei

Comment from naleta
Time: June 3, 2017, 7:25 am

Michael Moore!

Comment from J.S.Bridges
Time: June 3, 2017, 9:26 am

Sorta-like RushBabe put it…Once more unto the breach, my friends – once more –

(Been quite awhile since the last one of these got started…now, lessee…how does that go again?…Oh, yeah!! -)

I hereby nominate San Fran, Kalifornikatia’s Least-Finest Usual-Denizen, sour ol’ Red-Pants Janey-Insaney Fonda, the Fonda we couldn’t be less-fonda…C’monnn downnn-n-n, Janey – ‘at ol’ debbil, Satan, ol’ Scratch hisself, has got a nice, well-heated spot all set-out for you, just next to the River Styx outlet, an’ with an excellent view of the Burning Lava Pits! You’ll absolutely howl when you see it – and when it sees you, too!!…

Comment from tonycc
Time: June 3, 2017, 10:31 am

J.S.Bridges, such an eloquent and admirable pick. The sooner she leaves this earth, the better.

Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: June 3, 2017, 2:55 pm

Yes, but so far it seems like even the Devil doesn’t want her around…

Comment from currently
Time: June 3, 2017, 3:17 pm

Barbara Walters

Comment from BJM
Time: June 3, 2017, 3:21 pm

I’m waaay late this round but old lefties past their sell-by dates are thick on the ground in the formerly great state of California, so Ima picking Senator DiFi.

Comment from unkawill
Time: June 3, 2017, 3:26 pm

Stan Lee

Comment from Ripley
Time: June 3, 2017, 5:40 pm

Lest we forget. Vera Lynn

Comment from Mr. Dave
Time: June 3, 2017, 8:09 pm

Ramsey Clark, defender of the most vile tyrants on Earth. Maybe the ground won’t spit him back up.

Comment from spunkus
Time: June 3, 2017, 11:14 pm

Harry Belafonte

Comment from Cobrakai99
Time: June 4, 2017, 12:02 pm

Lord Mayor sadiq khan in one of the attacks he told the residents of London they should get used to.

Comment from Billy P
Time: June 4, 2017, 1:20 pm

Tommy LaSorda makes a visit to the pitcher’s mound in the sky.

Comment from platypuss
Time: June 4, 2017, 2:42 pm

Bob Dole

Comment from jwpaine
Time: June 4, 2017, 4:14 pm

Nancy Pelosi.

Because for just this once, couldn’t Death’s reach NOT exceed its grasp? I promise I’ll never ask for anything else, ever again.

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: June 4, 2017, 4:32 pm

Lord Mayor sadiq khan in one of the attacks he told the residents of London they should get used to.

Then it should be no bother to take Louise Mensch with him. tia

Comment from Cindermutha
Time: June 4, 2017, 10:27 pm

Valerie Jarrett

Comment from PatAZ
Time: June 4, 2017, 11:09 pm

Bill Ayres. Soon! Before he has time to write skinny O’s newest multi-million dollar best seller.

Comment from gromulin
Time: June 5, 2017, 12:44 am

Willie Nelson. Just…because.

Comment from Malcolm Kirkpatrick
Time: June 5, 2017, 5:09 am

The hideous toad, Jiang Zemin. of something stolen transplanted body parts cannot cure.

Comment from 16920502
Time: June 5, 2017, 7:37 am

Tony Bennett

Comment from harbqll
Time: June 5, 2017, 1:38 pm

Sean Connery

Comment from Ric Fan
Time: June 5, 2017, 2:32 pm

Jimmy Piersall died. RiP, Jimmy!


Comment from Can’t Hark My Cry
Time: June 5, 2017, 4:24 pm

I believe you have a winner. The BBC reports that Peter Sallis has died: http://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-40165443

Comment from Uncle Al
Time: June 5, 2017, 8:21 pm

@sassamon – looks like you’re a fast winner!
Sorry to hear about Peter S. otherwise…

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: June 5, 2017, 8:36 pm


“Press on, lad. We’ll meet up later.”

Why couldn’t it have been someone evil!
Farewell Wallace.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: June 5, 2017, 8:43 pm

A very short one! Good thing I have another splendid pick queued up already.

Comment from BJM
Time: June 5, 2017, 9:03 pm

Oh dear, I hope Sallis wasn’t wearing the wrong trousers.

Comment from Niña
Time: June 5, 2017, 11:08 pm

Well, that was fast!

Comment from sassamon
Time: June 6, 2017, 3:26 am

Sad to hear that Peter is no longer among us. I enjoyed his work as both Clegg and Wallace.

Hope everyones picks can stick around until after you make your choice in the next Dead Pool. I’ll make an exception for those persons that should go to the very hot place for eternity.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: June 7, 2017, 3:31 pm

George Soros wins the most wished for death, with a 2nd place tie going to Hanoi Jane and Lord Mayor “terrorism is normal” Sadiq Khan of London.

Comment from bikeboy
Time: June 8, 2017, 7:59 pm

Jerry LEE Lewis (aka “The Killer,” NOT the Nutty Professor / Rat Pack guy… who’s already on the list anyway)

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