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I’m wrapped a little too tight for this

I had to play host to a Zoom lecture tonight. I’ve never done that before, but the speaker has done a lot of it and told me not to worry, to turn over hosting to him once he started speaking.

Bad. No. That’s not how you do it. Once I gave him hosting, I had no controls at all. I couldn’t mute or kick anyone or let in latecomers in, and he was too absorbed in his subject to do it (and I don’t think he knew how).

Chaos ensued. It was a very small chaos, to be sure, but I was braced the whole time for a bigger chaos.

There were several loud and unmuted. There was that guy who didn’t know his camera was on and strolled around his house the whole time. There was one with no name, no camera and no mic that I was sure would turn out to be a wrong ‘un.

But we got it sorted in the end and, more the point, absolutely no penis pictures were thrust upon my elderly employers. Whew.

I need gin.

DING-DING-DING. We have a dickwinner. Catnip takes it with George P. Schultz. I think we have time to squeeze a DEAD POOL in tomorrow! You know when, you know where!


Comment from Carl
Time: February 11, 2021, 9:23 pm

At least you didn’t have a cat in your Zoom group.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: February 11, 2021, 11:48 pm

So, no more Peanuts cartoons?

Oh, wrong Schultz!

Ich weiß nichts. Nichts!

Comment from Armybrat
Time: February 12, 2021, 1:03 am

Our HOA meetings are by ZOOM right now. I think the board is starting to regret this….at least as they concern me. It’s FABULOUS! I can sit in my altogether, in my recliner, with the beverage of my choice and interject my issues/complaints any time I want. Gone are the days of shower, makeup and clothes, driving 10 min and sitting with a bottle of water and hoping the meeting will end so I can get to Happy Hour at the bar down the street. And let me tell you, when you bring up the same concern 3 meetings in a row and refuse to shut up when they want you to shut up (because there is no longer a quorum if I’m not on) the bastards take care of that item…and email and stop by to let me know they’ve taken care of the issue. ZOOM HOA meetings may be the BEST thing ever to happen!!!

Comment from Teej
Time: February 12, 2021, 1:57 am

That’s awesome, armybrat!

…but I’m still glad I have never, ever had an HOA.

Comment from Armybrat
Time: February 12, 2021, 2:15 am

@Teej- no HOA is not an option for me. When I spend just shy of a million dollars for a house I don’t want to see boats, boat trailers, RVs parked on the “lawns” around me. People are assholes….they want to do what they want when they want. The right deed restrictions, a strong HOA and a complaining asshole- like me- keep my neighborhood from looking like the boat storage yard down the road. I rest easy at night.

Comment from durnedyankee
Time: February 12, 2021, 9:46 am

Here an HOA would mean my gruppenfuhrer neighbor, who does ALL the things you describe on his own lawn, would by Jove make damn sure no one was doing those things on their lawns!

He’s a Biden voter and truly understands how two sets of ‘rules’ work.

Comment from drew458
Time: February 12, 2021, 2:41 pm

Every chicken treat ever!!


Our HOA does Zoom meetings too, and it’s awful. The condo boss is a stinker, and locks out anyone who has complained about anything. Plus, the meetings are very size limited, so many of the nearly 500 homeowners here can’t get on.

Comment from BJM
Time: February 12, 2021, 3:10 pm

My HOA gave up because we couldn’t maintain a quorum, the chickens kept wandering off and the president was a cantankerous old goat, literally.

Comment from LesterIII
Time: February 12, 2021, 5:35 pm

Heh… I was the bane of HOAs when in high school. Too much fun to mess with. Thank goodness the ease of high-quality digital photography and video didn’t exist yet.

Comment from Bill Emory
Time: February 13, 2021, 2:53 am

Gin! Yes. What kind?

Comment from BJM
Time: February 14, 2021, 6:51 pm

@Bill Emory…perhaps Sandringham Gin?

A Bombay Shappire lemonade or spritzer is my preferred summer tipple…but only Elijah Craig Barrel Proof will do in the winter.

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