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I love watching the bird videos that show up on YouTube.

We have five trees at our house: Three in the front, and two in the back yard. All are full of nesting birds: grackles, Eastern Kingbirds, and starlings, and maybe other birds I don’t know about. The Kingbirds are especially aggressive, though all of the birds give my little dog hell. But the wind has blown so hard this entire spring, that a lot of eggs have ended up on the ground, where that same little dog has eaten them. Then she has a tummy ache and lies on her pillow on the sofa until the pain passes. She has a gimpy leg, but still jumps, chases and barks at the birds. It’s like a circus round here 🙂

I downloaded the Merlin Bird ID by Cornell Lab for use on my smart phone. It really works to identify bird species that it “hears” through the phone mic.

Bird aficionados may already know about it but it never hurts to alert others to the app.

Pigeons are very, very smart. One summer, before we changed the style of our bird feeders, our little garden was chosen for gang headquarters for a gang of a dozen or so. I chose to defend my turf, and the battle was on. They quickly learned how high on the roof put them -just- out of the range of the garden hose. Then they learned that opening the house door to the garden was usually a bluff. Soon, not only was I losing,but they were taunting me through the windows, because, they knew I couldn’t reach them through the glass.

Forced by circumstances, I escalated. You understand.

I bought a snake. No, not a real one, but a fake-snake that looked very, very real – none of your kid’s party rubber snakes, but a good-enough-to-really-terrify one of Mrs. Vegetable’s visiting friends and (HA!) good enough to fool the pigeons. They would not land -even in the trees- near the snake. I made sure to move the snake around at least once a day and it was working a treat!

However my victory in the war was fleeting and it was the Dove Of Peace ©️(Used with permission) that ruined everything. Stupid, stupid dove. Seriously, they really are stupid. The pigeons were smart enough to avoid the snake, but not the damn dove. He landed beside the snake, and started eating the scattered bird seed that the pigeons had been afraid to go after. The pigeons gasped (I assume anyhow) and waited around at a safe distance to watch the upcoming gory spectacle… which obviously didn’t happen. I actually saw all this and realizing what was happening ran into the garden shouting and waving my arms as a distraction.

But it was too late. The snake never worked again. The pigeons knew it was a fake, and they remembered it. Not even a new different fake-snake worked. They just bullied one of the new kids in the pack to go and test it out and when he lived, they were all down seconds later.

I made one more attempt using modern mechanized technology

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-19lV4hVZ5o

But, like the early tanks of WWI it wasn’t really ready for the realities of war in the trenches, er, up the garden path, and I eventually abandoned the fight.

Pigeons! Bah, humbug!

@Some Veg…the last I saw of the fake snake was a hawk flying away with it.

We had a pair of woodpeckers drilling the house siding so I got a fake owl…it worked for a while until the blue jays exposed the ruse…damned male jay landed on it, cackled and pooped.

I ended up stuffing the woodpeckers regular pecking spots and storage holes with cotton balls soaked in peppermint oil. It was very unsightly, but it worked. So many critters abhor peppermint oil…we dab it on the cars frames to keep mice from chewing the wiring…you get a fresh minty smell in the car too!.

Speaking of peckers…didja all notice that Mickey Tindall called Harry a bellend? Zara must have drawn the short straw to mind them. I particularly enjoyed Peter Phillips delivering a brilliant cut direct on the steps outside St. Paul’s. The Duchess obviously didn’t get it which made it even funnier as her smile grew ever more strained.

@Anonymous — Ooh! Ooh! I love learning new words, especially somewhat naughty ones. Thank you! Bellend is a very pleasing addition to my impolite vocabulary.

I don’t quite understand how I failed to hear/see it before now; evidently the term has been in use for centuries.