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Let me tell you how my day started

I was biking ahead of yet another storm this morning. Bearing in mind how wet I got the other day, I wore my full banana suit. I was tearing down the path when my bike suddenly shuddered to a halt.

Upon examination, a doggy poop bag had been picked up by the chain and wrapped securely around the gear shifting mechanism at the back. I mean, that sucker was cinched up tight.

For once, I wasn’t carrying my trusty Leatherman. Not even a pocket knife. What did I have?

My fingers, dear reader. My fingers.

I won’t overdramatize what happened next. I was able to pick away the neck of the bag in little bits and then advance the chain to free it. I don’t even know if there was poop in the bag.

It wasn’t like squeezing a pastry bag full of flaming dogshit, which is I’m sure the image that went through everyone’s mind. In fact, I even made it in ahead of the rain. But still – screw you, Thursday morning!

Dead Pool tomorrow! Comest thou here and choose!

Comments


Comment from ExpressoBold Pureblood
Time: November 16, 2023, 10:00 pm

“doggy poop back” = “doggy poop bag”

If the citizen is not going properly dispose of the non-biodegradable container, then what’s the point of having them laying about in an ordinary bike path where mayhem can occur?

Hootie-Hoo !!!!!!
Dilly Dilly !!!!!


Comment from Pupster
Time: November 16, 2023, 11:46 pm

Must have been a pretty tall doodie bag to get caught in the chain.

You do have the strangest adventures.


Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: November 17, 2023, 12:23 am

Dear lady.
If might offer a suggestion on your curse.

“Screw you moron who leaves your dog poo bag laying around”.

That is a weird adventure though you must admit.


Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: November 17, 2023, 1:07 am

I should like to add, in the interest of diversity, you promote and campaign for this picture to be a diversity replacement for the Gorton’s Fisherman in the Gorton’s advertising.

For those unfamiliar with Gorton’s, they hail from the city of Glou-chester in Masswatuchetts. And here is their fisherman.
https://carboncostume.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/gortons-fisherman.jpg


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 17, 2023, 2:38 pm

Fixed. Thank you, ExpressoBold.

I think the handle of the bag was sticking up and just caught the chain, which reeled it in.

It’s the second time I’ve had the bike just stop. First time, the bungee cord slipped off the rear basked and tangled itself around the axle. Weird feeling, and I always worry it will happen in a more urban spot.


Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: November 17, 2023, 4:25 pm

S. Weasel @ November 17, 2023, 2:38 pm:
First time, the bungee cord slipped off the rear basket and tangled itself around the axle.

I’ve learned to make sure the bungee cords on the (front) basket are not loose.

When unloading groceries, I unhook them and let them dangle while moving the goods out of the basket. Then I forget about them while carrying the goods into the house. Then I don’t notice they’re still dangling while I start on the next trip, and they wrap around the front axle. This usually unbends the hook, though the last two times there was just enough hook left to use.

On another subject: Ms. Weasel, please remember the DP numbering. Friday’s DP will be _171_, not “161”. (The real 161 was held last December.)

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