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The Steamboat McGoo thread

steamboatmcgoo.jpg

            The once was a steam-boatin’ man
            Who sported a show-boatin’ tan.
            The ladies said, “my!
            He’s as brown and as spry
            As that dream-boatin’ Ed McMahon!”


Steamboat McGoo is in the hospital being fitted with a shiny knew titanium knob. Here’s a helpful rhyming dictionary. Do it. Do it for McGoo.

Comments


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 12, 2007, 6:33 pm

There once was a man named McGoo,
Who (so rumor had it) huffed glue.
He blew out his hip,
his left knee, his top lip
and his lateral kalamazoo.


Comment from Dawn
Time: July 12, 2007, 7:08 pm

A challenge is lain
Wax poetic as McGoo
lies broken and lame


Comment from Gnus
Time: July 12, 2007, 7:15 pm

There once was a man named McGoo,
Whose hip had him feeling all blue.
He went to the doc,
Gawd, what a crock.
We hope he’ll be back pretty soo

n.


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 8:21 pm

McGoo, rhyming ‘booger’ one day,
Said Islamic Rage Boy was gay.
IRB, to get even
(even though he was grievin’)
Said “Sure hope lightning shoots out of your ass.”

McGoo, Steamboat, One each
Was issued to Weasel to teach.
Said Weez to the Goo: “Mac,
I’m cutting you no slack
Until you get hip with your speech.”

Steamboat McGoo was quite seedy
(His eyeballs were also quite beady.)
His clothes were a mess,
And hygiene? Take a guess,
But mostly, McGoo’s just plain kneedy.


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 8:38 pm

McGoo needs to recuperate, man!
So no rhymes about slowness of gait, man!
And don’t dress like Elvis
Just to wiggle your pelvis,
‘Cause McGoo will recriminate, man!


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 8:38 pm

Christ, I love that rhyming dictionary!


Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: July 12, 2007, 8:52 pm

Er… Titanium knob? As in uh… never mind.


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 9:00 pm

While away, a certain McGoo
Caused very bad poems to accrue
On the thread dedicated
(July 12 it was dated)
For wishing au ‘voir! (not adieu!)

McGoo’s poemistry, it could own ya
He could even make “moon” rhyme with “Sonya.”
Or “orange” with “twit”
“Islamic Rage Boy” with “shit”
Or “flu” with the “pleural pneumonia.”


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 9:02 pm

Titanium knob
Who among us hasn’t wished
For something so hip?


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 9:21 pm

Don’t know why I mixed “knees” up with “hips”
That’s as bad as “anus” for “lips.”
McGoo’s HIP was replaced
His knees? Not effaced.
(Hope his nurse has a dress that unzips.)


Comment from porkthebean
Time: July 12, 2007, 10:23 pm

We have a web friend McGoo,
Whose wit made the ladies coo,
He bowed and mid dip,
He blew out a hip,
He’s now worried about bedpans and poo.


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 10:26 pm

Unrepentant was hipster McGoo
But his doctor knew just what to do:
Cut a hole near his butt
Then installed a new strut
and then sealed it all up with some glue!


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 10:27 pm

rofl, P&B!


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 10:31 pm

McGoo, to his nurse (just to teach)
Said “Sweetie, of course you’re a peach.
But for total success
Simply exhale much less–
Blow’s just an expression of speech.”


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 12, 2007, 10:37 pm

PtheB.


Comment from whitishrabbit
Time: July 13, 2007, 12:30 am

Hang in there McGoo
tenacious syllable count
this haiku’s for you


Comment from Shuko
Time: July 13, 2007, 9:13 am

Whilst thinking about our McGoo,
We must send him our envy too.
With his new brass knob,
Doing its hip job,
The nurses won’t know what to do!

Chuggin’ down the Mississipp’
Ol’ McGoo threw out his hip
He cried out aloud,
“This hip done me proud,
But now I must live as a Crip.”

It’s too early for me to be “waxing poetic.” :p It shows, hahah.

I watched Weasel Stomping Day again. I felt compelled to return.


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 13, 2007, 12:02 pm

Weasel stomping day makes me sad 🙁 so here are two McGoo inspired quatrains:

O, sing the praises of Steamboat’s new knob!
A burnished titanium thingamabob.
It’s shiny as silver and heavy as hell
And all of the ladies declare it’s just swell.

Come praise the prosthetic of Steamboat McGoo!
It’s wond’rously clever and hygeinic, too.
It bolts to his pelvis and runs down his thigh
And he got it on Friday, 13th of July.


Comment from porkthebean
Time: July 13, 2007, 12:26 pm

Steamboat had a little pain
Emanating near his peas
And everywhere he tried to walk
It brought him to his knees

He sought out a doc’s sound advice
Who then replaced his knob
It made his friends break out in verse
In praise of that titanium job


Comment from porkthebean
Time: July 13, 2007, 12:37 pm

Rats. That shoulda read ‘Emanating from near his peas’
.
.
.
Weasel was a little stoat
Whose verbosity was sharp as needles
And in honor of McGoo’s new hip
He made us all eat beetles


Comment from Shuko
Time: July 13, 2007, 2:12 pm

McGoo, you old bean, you must take care.
Of greatest danger you must beware.
This shiny new knob,
Tempts weasels to rob.
This “sparklies” fetish should give you scare.

Ball and socket hip
Replacement with new brass knob
Where is my bedpan?


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: July 13, 2007, 4:22 pm

irbhaiku.jpg


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 13, 2007, 7:57 pm

Wonder how IRB’s right hand got so big…..


Comment from porkthebean
Time: July 14, 2007, 7:05 pm

Hand? That’s not a hand. That is his knob.


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 15, 2007, 9:56 am

It certainly looks like the two are well-acquainted.


Pingback from Habit. Fact. Meme. Goody. « Stop and Wander
Time: July 17, 2007, 11:07 am

[…] Yesterday I got tagged. I wasn’t even doing anything, honest. I imagine I got memed between the eyes probably cus I check weasel’s blog as often as I check my own (how else would I keep up on ass haiku or get the latest update on a cyborg friend’s titanium knob?) […]


Comment from jwpaine
Time: July 17, 2007, 11:48 pm

Abbreviated wobberjack:

And so McGoo limp’d back at last,
back to the minion-filled abode
of Weasel–He of sharpened wit
Undulled by scotch (now that’s a load).

Beware new-hipped McGoo, dear friends!
The shaft that gleams, the knob that glints
(Read thou into this gentle rhyme
Entrendre none, you naughty bint!)

‘McGoo has gulped the percoset?
Say No to dope, you fool!’ Weez said.
McGoo, abed, half out his head
Replied “I’ve got lightning coming out of my ass.”

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