sweasel.com

The way Howie Carr used to do it, he’d throw out everything and start from scratch every time. Make everyone phone in and re-pick a celebrity. The downside is, you get the benefit of other people’s cleverness in the previous round. And you have to phone in again. And some people might have gone away thinking they owned a celebrity until he or she died.

The upside is, everyone gets the benefit of changing circumstances and a fresh start.

Wot fink?

I’m taking dibs on Robert Byrd this time! What’s my prize? Swine flu, by the way.

What’s that at the bottom of the dead pool?

Looks kinda like an Oldsmobile.

Whoot! I’m the big weiner! Yah you sent me some stuff before (prisoner crafts as you’ll recall) and you drew a cute weasel on the box. I’ll shoot you a note soon.

As for ol’ Teddy – well I’ll just say “Bye” and leave it at that.

Well I’m sure as hell not going to take the Lockerbie bomber guy for round 2. I predict a “miraculous cure” in his near future.

Justice < oil in Scotland it seems.

I’ll go with Kirk Douglas this time. I like him but he’s what 94?

Congratulations Enas! Couldn’t have happened to a better person.

Feinstein…in the garage…with a brickbat. Well, one can hope.

Herewith, today’s proof that God has a sense of humor.

Well, I don’t suppose The Weasel will post it to me if I win but, damnit, I’m going to take part this time with a big fat Madelein Albright.

Cause?

I couldn’t care less.

Oooh, Albright..good one. While we’re on vapid trolls, someone claim Helen Thomas..quickly.

Heh. Listening to Howie Carr streaming over the internet (WRKO if you’d like to listen, too). I knew he’d be doing a Ted Kennedy memorial show. He’s good enough to steer the conversation from getting TOO nasty, but partisan enough to make it a good palate cleanser after the mainstream hagiographies going on.

But my favorite part? Listening to the Boston traffic reports. Yay! I’m not stuck on 95 South in Canton!

…or on the rotary in Lynn, Lynn, city of sin.

Hmmm…

How about that celebrity crime host guy… whats-his-name?..

Oh, yeah. Dominick Dunne. I’ll take him. He seems sickly.

What?

Hahahaha…you almost got me, Blue.

Poor bastard. I didn’t know he died today, overshadowed as he was by Teddy K. As an avid follower of True Crime, I liked Dunne’s Power, Privilege, and Justice TV series.

I believe I’ll keep my original pick- Amy “WTF” Winehouse.
How is it still breathing?

I was gonna change to Byrd but he done got snatched up, so I’ll stick with Patrick Swayze. He’s gotta die sometime, right?

After the whole David Carradine thing, I have high hopes for Steven Seagal to off himself in a most spectacularly humiliating fashion.

I still gots Arlen Sphecter!

I’d like to pick Jimmy Carter. I’m hopin we’re on a roll.

John Holder, Science Czar.

Because it’ll be good for Mother Gaia.

I’m going with Carrot Top, in deference to the Power of Positive Thinking.

I’ll take Mymood Iminajihad, Who I predict will NEVER notice the predator circling over his head until it’s too late……. (we can hope)

Mongo might be winning next….unfortunately.

I’m sticking with Art Garfunkel. That Nancy with the high-pitched voice has got to go!!!

I’m standing on Ruth Ginsberg, another deserving leftard.

Wait….can I change that to Chris Dodd so he can join his favorite sandwich partner.

I guess this was a quick Dead Pool. Domminick Dunn died a couple hours ago.

Yeah, that was kinda the joke. I was just being a smartass.

I enjoyed his true crime stuff, too. The story of his daughter’s murder and the travesty of justice that resulted in her killer only serving a few years still makes me angry.

I pick desperately unpleasant Keith Olbermann. Anyone that bilious is daily scoring enough bad karma to get a meteor strike, never mind a lightning bolt.

BTW, Weasel, I’m finally looking at that graphic on a decent monitor. Is that from scratch? When HM’s beloved government finally deigns to let you work for a living, you should be absolutely minted.

Lawrence O’Donnell–of thundering apoplexy.

Which graphic, David? The latest Obama one? Neh…best described as a collage of stolen photographs held together with spit and illustration. Weaseltrivia: the hands belong to Tony Blair. I *am* legal to work now; I just can’t figure out what to do with myself. I’m a lousy freelancer. There isn’t an entrepreneurial bone in my body.

Gender check, mongo – m or f? You look likely to walk away with the pool this time. I was thinking of making the fabulous prize a copy of Balls magazine — one of the UK’s tackier titty mags — but if you’d rather have a kidney pudding or some spotted dick…?

S. Weasel writes:

“Gender check, mongo – m or f? You look likely to walk away with the pool this time. I was thinking of making the fabulous prize a copy of Balls magazine — one of the UK’s tackier titty mags — but if you’d rather have a kidney pudding or some spotted dick…?”

Isn’t that what killed Kennedy in the first place? Drinking so much that his kidneys turned to pud’? Or, maybe he got the spotted dick from..

..oh well, I’ll leave it there.

Weasel, I feel like a proud papa! If you check your archives, you will find that I suggested the Deal Pool way back when. I know this is vain, but the winning entry fading from view makes me absolutely giddy..

..as does the image of Ted reporting to the pearly gates, only to see a young lady, in dripping wet attire whispering into St Peter’s shell-like.

My money’s down on Dodd and then Byrd for a Demo-crat tri-fecta.

..ummm, Let me revise my pick(s). I opt for Jimmuh Carter who, of late, said about Kennedy’s midnight swim in Chappaquiddick, “He’s more than made up for it.”

Please, God. Call this pantload home. I’m down on my knees beggin’ ya!

Robert Mugabe. The Zimbabwe government vehemently denied that he is ill, so I figure he’s about to croak.

Has anyone called Elizabeth Edwards yet? I’m betting Johnny-boy would be more than happy to cut her off, these days.

Oooo OOOO I pick Kim Jung-Il!

My theory is that Nancy Pelosi has been deceased for years, and a giant cockroach has stuffed itself inside her botoxed carcass; therefore, it is too late to pick her…guess I’ll vote for the cockroach! *goes in search for some RAID*

Suze Orman

I’m not dead!
I’m getting better.
I think I’ll go for a walk…

Oh, and that article was from last November!

If armybrat’s truly going with Dodd, I’ll take Bader Ginsburg (she needs to be represented). If not … I’ll have to think about it.

Armybrat snagged her up the line, Felix. But hold a happy thought!

Yeah, but in her next comment she asked to switch to Dodd. I hope she comes back & makes her preference clear.

Oh and, Stoaty, did you get my email t’other day?

Actually I meant the dead pool graphic. That skeleton looks fairly anatomically kosher to my untrained eye. If that was you then you gots mad skillz, girl.

It sucks being freelance. I’ve done it and the pay is good but it’s a nervewracking existence. When you do decide what you want to do, then you have the almost equally fun task of bombarding people with CVs.

I did, Felix! Thank you and apologies. I read email all day, but I only answer it once every few days, because I have to download it to a mail client to keep my identities straight. I’ve answered a few business mails as Stoaty, which is pretty bad mojo. Though I don’t suppose answering my blogmail as Mrs Soandso would be very good, either.

Why the HELL webmail and email clients don’t just let you type whatever you like on the “from” line, I do not know!

Same difference, David. I cut that illustration together with pieces of photos, too. IIRC the top part of the skull is a photo. And the glass. And perhaps the umbrella. And then strung it all together with mad Photoshop skillz.

Though I should point out, I owned a human skeleton for many years (in addition to the one I’m wearing), so I kind of know from skeleton.

Man, getting rid of THAT thing was one of the harder components of my move…

Congrats Enas, don’t eat it all at one sitting.

As much as I’d like to pick an anti-establishment Russian journalist, I don’t know any.

Fidel Castro is looking pretty healthy lately.

Dibs.

Thankee Dawn & Pups! I have to be kinda careful with carbs these days so no, not all in one sitting. 😀

I’m going with Michael Moore. Not particularly old but he looks pretty ripe for a heart attack.

Whups! This comment is by me and not Patrick Swayze.

-Enas Yorl

sorry, iamfelix, I was just makin’ a funny with Dodd. I think the only thing coming his way will be a bolt of lightning from the voters (you hear me CT…vote the bastard OUT!!!). I’m sticking with Ginsberg. Bitch deserves to be next in line….although I’d be thankful if Jimmah actually went next.

Ha, speaking of skeletons. Some friends and I decided to take a road trip to Yucatan, Mexico. Now there are some really bad hombres in northern Mexico, my solution: I propped a skeleton in the back seat and put big radiation stickers on the car.

Not a single problem, man what a trip. I think I danced with that skeleton one night but it’s kind of hard to remember, Tequila! Jeebus, don’t eat the worm.

Seeing as somone has already grabbed my man Jimmah I’m going with ole Fidel Castro.

Same difference, really. And equally as sweet.

I’ll take 2. Noam Chomsky and Ariel Sharon.

You wanna just pay me now?

Oh shit, I just picked 2 Jews, didn’t I? Gimme Reverend Wright too.

Bernie Madoff, shivved in the kidney by an irate fellow inmate serving time for insider trading who says when arrested, “He made us all look bad.”

Hey, as long as I’m guessing; go for baroque.

I picked Fidel in the cabana with a cigar, Princess.

Olivia DeHavilland…..

She is over 90 years old, after all….

I’ll go with George Soros – wishful thinking, because I’m all about teh hate.

Nancy Pelosi. Her face has been stretched so tight that it is going to snap like an old rubber band.

Maria Kennedy Shriver Schwarzenegger looks 2/3rds dead already, but I’ll go with Mr. Kennedy Schwarzenegger.

All the steroids in the 70s have already give him heart disease.

Damn, Fidel’s taken, too. Guess I’ll have to come up with a new one.

Betty Ford – not that I want it to happen.

I’m going to take Bill Cosby. According to my aunt, he has diabetes.

Yah that diabeetus is death sentence for sure. {eye roll}

Hmmm, haggis eh? Could be worse I suppose: Heinz Haggiz. 😀

Ooooo…don’t diss dude’s diabeetus 🙂

Dangit, my smilies are broke again. Why? Whyyyyy?

Ohhh. Your smiley has a nose, Enas. I didn’t make a nosey smiley.

It’s not in color, so I can’t tell for sure, but is that Haggis bedecked in MacLeod of Lewis?

Last time I didn’t think of her till afterwards: Helen Thomas.

I don’t have an encyclopedic knowledge of tartans, harbqll. It’s this:

Damn, I had Betty Ford in the last one…

As tempting as it would be to go with Abe Vigoda (mostly because of the website), I’m taking Henry Kissinger.

Aw man, I was going to pick Helen Thomas. I mean, jeebers, she looks like a corpse already.

OK, my next pick is Keith Richards.

My chit is for Margaret Thatcher. And I’m not sure how I feel about that. But I don’t think she’s going to be with us much longer.

One could only hope it would be Robert Gibbs. A Press Room slip-N-fall in the oily pool of his own arrogance would be worth a tin of Haggis!

Sweet. I knew it was going to be Canned Haggis. I was going to suggest it but I didn’t want to sway the karma.

I would gladly trade you a can of Haggis for a jar of Pickled Pork Skins And here you thought “pork rinds” meant something else. I call ’em “pig flaps.”

I can also get pickled pork lips if you’re interested.

Okay, I’m ging with emotions here, and for no good reason except that I’m hoping it will happen, I’m choosing Hugo Chavez by assassination. Let that f*er rot in hell.

Regarding that tartan —

The closest thing I can find with the totally appropriate Tartan Ferret is if the thin pale-colored stripe was yellow, it would be STA 1208 Wallace. Grant has multiple tartans, but this isn’t close to any of them. Darned if I can figure out what that is, even with all my whizbangery Algore-created innerweb stuff.

Speaking of which, I pick Algore, the High Priest of Global Alarmism (he did flunk out of divinity school, after all) by freezing to death on the ever increasing Antarctic ice mass.

Also… as a Highland descendent, I would personally treasure a can of Glorious Haggis (even if I merely enter it into the local Haggis Hurling Competition).

John Murtha. One can always hope …

I’m gonna go with Robin Williams. Why? Well, it’s not like you really want to know, is it?

Hmm. Given the events of this weekend, I am going to have to change my vote to Glenn Beck, who’s death will likely be ruled an unfortunate suicide (after all, everyone who lived through the Clinton era should remember how many of his enemies in Arkansas “committed suicide” with multiple shotgun blasts to the back of the head) 🙁

The tartan might be Wallace Modern.

http://www.scotlandshop.net/designertartanclothing/wallacemoderntartan.php

Appears death has taken a holiday vis a vis our list…

It seems that Jim Carroll has shuffled off his mortal coil. I’d never heard of him until today but according to the NY Slimes he was Kind of A Big Deal at one time.

Awww, Patrick Swayze has died. Poor guy. Somebody got the haggis today I think.

Mongo just a pawn in game for haggis.

In a related story; Mrs. Pupster found and purchased a can of ‘Heinz Spotted Dick’ at the local Piggly Wiggly. What is the proper alcoholic beverage to over-indulge in over a big pile of that treat?