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CHAPPAQUIDDICARE: looking out for the important things…

Or should it be ChappaquiddicKare, do you think?

“Chappaquiddicare, because we can!”

Ummmmm, maybe not…..how ’bout this:

“Ted’s dead, so support Chappaquiddicare, lest we send you a horse’s head!”

TedCare: we’ll reduce healthcare costs by cutting off your oxygen.

ChappaquiddiCare: The cure for a nation already under water.

(Grrr… There’s got to be a better “budget” & “under water” joke in here somewhere.)

ChappaquiddiCare: With a nation drowning in debt, we need this to help keep people’s heads above water.

After that man is in the ground, I’m going to get a little glass jar, fill it with water from under that bridge, and set it at his grave site.

Motherfucker should be buried with it, but I can’t make that happen, so this plan is the best I can do.

TedCare: You simply can’t fathom better coverage.

ChappaquiddiCare

Your future’s bubbling under…

The TeddyCare Bill: Fat, bloated, impossible to understand, and willing to leave people to die whenever politically necessary.

Too blatent? Yeah, probably too blatent.

How about ‘Diving deep to get you what you deserve’?

No, that’s doesn’t really pop, does it? Oh wait, I know:

ChappaquiddiCare: Everything else is just water under the bridge.

Death Panel now called Oldsmobile Delmont.

ChappaquiddiCare: “Fluid in lungs” – not covered.

“TeddyCare” rocks, harbqll. So I’m thinking:

“TeddyCare—It will leave you Breathless”

TedCare: Before you die, you’ll find yourself wishing for a brain tumor.

TedCare: The best plan available couldn’t save him, so quitcher bitchin’ about waiting 8 hours for a band-aid, peasant!

TedCare — only a ten hour wait to obtain treatment for a girlfriend under water.

Kopechne Care: You’ll be dying to have it.

TedCare — coverage is guaranteed for each and every American drunk.

harbqll – Let me fix that for you..

“The TeddyCare Bill: Fat, bloated, impossible to understand, and willing to leave people to die whenever politically EXPEDIENT.”

There ya go, all fixed up……

Chappaquiddickare – re-join the party or go soak your head!

Chappaquiddicare – cutting health costs for seniors. If Mary Jo had lived she’d be a burden on Medicare

Via Ace of Spades, we learn that not only was Teddy a philandering alcoholic douchenozzle, he wasn’t averse to getting in bed with the Soviets if it might damage Reagan.

They’re going to bury this piece of refuse in Arlington. In Arlington! If there’s any justice the ground will spit his coffin out.

Chappaquiddicare Lite:

Half the Compassion Treating Caring, All the Pain Cost Deficit Fucking.

Kinda sorta in the same vein but not really I guess. The Kennedy clan has been at times called the U.S. royal family.
Upon careful analysis this data pops up.
The Brit royals have been drunks, drug addicts, drunken drug addicts, drugged drunks, womanizers, rapists, pedophiles, murderers and practitioners of bestiality.
The Kennedys seem to miss in only one area. Still hoping for pics of Teddy cavorting with a chicken or shagging sheep or boinking bossy.
Perhaps that Wonderful Weasel Woman, with her English contacts, could pad the list out a bit. Needs the attention of those who recognize depravity and God knows I resemble that remark.

I seem to be recycling a lot of comments the past 2 days, but I keep finding good ones – This, from iOwnTheWorld:

I suggest the proponents of the “Anyone Who Refuses to Lionize Ted Kennedy is a Soul-less Schmuck Health Care Reform Bill” add the following to the “Death Squad Booklet of Healthcare Options for Useless Eaters” — In the “Check which Option you would prefer in the event the cost of your health care divided by your age falls below Allowable Federal Standards” section, add “The Kennedy ‘I Care’ Option: Rather than force my fellow Americans to spend their hard-earned money on the Kevorkian Cocktail and Cremation Option, I choose the Environmentally Sound, No Greenhouse Gasses Option. Just throw me into a pond and leave me there.”

I heard a rumor that they were going to name a Carrier for Uncle Teddy. It will be 50% wider than other Carriers in the Navy, Will be Christened with a bottle of Scotch rather than Champaign, and on it’s maiden voyage, they will test the catapults by shooting black Oldsmobiles off the deck….

After which it will immediately sail to Vladivostok to offer it’s aid to the Russians in sinking the USS Ronald Reagan…..

😉

http://returnoftheconservatives.blogspot.com/2007/01/us-navy-welcomes-uss-ted-kennedy.html

Ted-Care, because it’s more effecient than drowning them one at a time.

Thanks for the fix, SF. Much better flow. And the aircraft carrier joke just got swiped.

I also like ‘Fluid in lungs not covered’. Awesome.

Another possible alternate name for ObamaCare:

KopechneCare, because it’s dead in the water.

(I’m not the author, I swiped this one)

KopechneCare. I like it. Quite apart from the joke, JeffS, it remembers the better person.

Indeed, Sweasel. Indeed.

Be sure to check in on the Dead Pool Thread. I have just added the fabulous prize.

Courtesy, as usual, of Uncle B, who grunts and shrugs whenever I put absurd things in the shopping cart, bless ‘im.

KopechneCare: Drunk men first. Then women and children. Wait; forget about the women and children.

LOL… On a lighter note, I am watching what is probably the WORST movie since BRAZIL…..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa7ck5mcd1o

I thought it was a joke when I saw the trailer, but apparently not 😉

OH….

GOD……

MUST…..

CHANGE….

CHANNEL……

EYES….

BEING…..

RAPED……..

LOL… I wonder if I should change my dead pool choice to Deborah Gibsons career. This stinker would break Tom Servo and Crow T Robot’s will to live…….. 😉

Dude. That is at the top of my netflix list, as of now.

No slogan, just a heartfelt wish that the syphillitic sonofabitch will spend eternity somewhere inside of Satan’s anus.

How about:

Shut up and get in the car.