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So I get to paint my whole body with myrrh, anyway

Yeah. No, really.

Remember that case of ringworm I picked up before Christmas? Yep. I’m still a crusty, boogery mess. Damn thing heals in one spot and breaks out in another.

I dropped by a walk-in clinic at Christmas, saw a doctor I didn’t know and got five tubes of ointment. I saw my own GP last month (for my annual blood pressure check), rolled down my sock and showed him my nastiest bit, got a shrug and one tube of ointment.

My medical intervention is deescalating.

I’d blame the NHS, but my doctor in Rhode Island noticed a patch of ringworm on my leg and gave me nothing. (Yes, I’ve had it before. Fungus seems to like me. I should try growing champignon mushrooms on my ass).

So, in desperation, I’ve seen a qualified herbalist. Earning qualifications here requires a pretty rigorous medical course, so it’s not like going to Sunshine McButterfly the spirit healer. I’ve got some chance of getting something that works.

Which turns out to be myrrh. And tea tree oil. She made up a bucket of “paint” and I literally take a paintbrush and slather it onto the affected areas.



Comment from Scubafreak
Time: April 14, 2011, 11:17 pm

Oi.. If haven’t the foggiest idea why, but when you got to the end, all I could think of was Shydove over on the cornfield telling us all about FIGGING, which (apparently) she and her SO are into quite often.

Now, you didn’t mention freshly peeled ginger there, but still, I would advise being very careful around the lady bits, or the experience could take a WHOLE new direction… 😉

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: April 14, 2011, 11:17 pm

Never had ringworm, but I’ve had other fungal fun.

Athlete’s foot was annoying. Jock rash was intolerable.

So what I want to know is, where do the damn fungi live? Why is it that scrubbing with soap and water doesn’t just kill them? Or coating the affected area with antiseptics like straight propyl alcohol?

Where do the little bastards hide?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 14, 2011, 11:19 pm

I gather they’re pretty much always on your skin. Or many people’s skin. What makes them flare into nastiness, I don’t know.

I had athlete’s foot repeatedly as a kid. And the toenail thing some years ago. And the scalp one.

I’m telling you, fungus LOVES me.

Comment from Nina
Time: April 14, 2011, 11:52 pm

And I don’t even like mushrooms. 🙂

Comment from JeffS
Time: April 15, 2011, 12:24 am

“No pain, no gain.”

[ducks, runs for cover]


Comment from Oceania
Time: April 15, 2011, 1:00 am

Looks like a copper etch print?

Comment from Argentium G. Tiger
Time: April 15, 2011, 1:01 am

The tea tree oil is the anti-fungal in your herbalist’s mix, and it’s probably a lot better than most OTC anti-fungals, frankly.

I wish I’d thought of using tea tree oil during my last fight with the DemonFungus<tm> a few years back. I ended up finding out from my local pharmacist that she could (and did) save me a ton of money by selling me a 500g tub of the same antifungal medicine that they charged $10 for a 30g tube of. Used most of that tub too.

Comment from Oh Hell
Time: April 15, 2011, 1:31 am

Maybe Oil of Oregano? Not the cheap stuff (of course…) but the good quality undiluted stuff. Seems to work on the toenail fungus pretty well.

Comment from Can\’t hark my cry
Time: April 15, 2011, 1:33 am

In answer to the question, “Where do the little bastards hide?”


Apparently, they don’t. (Warning: the article at that link will make you seriously itchy.)

Comment from Mono The Elderish
Time: April 15, 2011, 2:12 am

technically all fungus is flesh eating (in theory) …. so you could (in theory) say that you have a flesh eating fungal infection. You know, for partys.

Comment from Pablo
Time: April 15, 2011, 2:33 am

I gather they’re pretty much always on your skin. Or many people’s skin. What makes them flare into nastiness, I don’t know.

It’s the moisture. Especially with that jock itch one. Arizona is where you can go and hide, I think, and yes, if it works IT BUUUURRRRNNS!! Always.

Comment from Oceania
Time: April 15, 2011, 2:57 am

Manuka tea tree? Hydrocarbons and innate signalling proteins will attack the fungal eukaryote.
I would recommend activated manuka honey instead.

Comment from Frit
Time: April 15, 2011, 3:35 am

I had ringworm a long time ago. Cured it with an ointment called “Blue Star” – burned like all get out towards the end, but the ringworm never came back. (A web search for Blue Star Ointment will give you their website, if you’re interested.)

Other searches which might yield helpful info:
– Doug Kaufmann Know The Cause (Theory based on the notion that the body can be purged of fungus with proper diet and supplements to prevent nasty break-outs.)
– Fungus Focus (Their product guide has some supplements designed to purge your system of fungus, and prevent new flare-ups.)

[Didn’t post links to avoid spam filter. Also, figured if you were interested, you’d be willing to search, if not, links would be a wast of time anyway.]

Personal note about the info on the websites noted above: Everyone has a different metabolism. What works for one person may be worthless to another.

Good luck!

Comment from David Gillies
Time: April 15, 2011, 3:58 am

So it’s true: girls do have cooties. I knew it!

A steam power washer is very good at getting moss off a concrete path. Maybe that would work. You could probably hire one at your local garden centre.

Comment from Scott Jacobs
Time: April 15, 2011, 10:40 am


Damnit, she mixed up the myrrh and the holy water again…

Comment from some vegetable
Time: April 15, 2011, 11:55 am

All around her rosy butt
the ringworm plagued the weasel
So she dipped her ass in hot tea made of myrrh
It burns! Screams the weasel

By the way, this episode puts a whole new spin on the the Wise Men’s gifts to Jesus. Just sayin’

Comment from Steve In Tulsa
Time: April 15, 2011, 12:02 pm

I learned a good cure when I was young. Take clean blank paper and burn it on a plate. As soon as the fire goes out, quick, take the ashes away and there is a yellow residue on the plate. Get that on your finger, fast, and rub it into the ringworm. It has worked for me everytime. Well, maybe three times. You have to apply a couple of times a day but it will rapidly heal up.

Comment from Sporadic Small Arms Fire
Time: April 15, 2011, 12:55 pm

May we have a re-do of this Flash animation this time with the fire/fumes coming from the naughty bits? A trail of champignons would be a nice touch.


Comment from Joan of Argghh!
Time: April 15, 2011, 1:31 pm

Maybe this guy can help.


Comment from Uncle Monkey
Time: April 15, 2011, 4:04 pm

My take would be to see if you can solve it with a diet.
Fungus likes you for some reason?
Change the ph makeup of the petri dish!

There’s a theory floating out there that cancer is a fungus, and great strides have been made by treating it as such. I’ve seen the results first hand.

It seems to me Western medicine tends to treat the symptoms – in your case topically – rather than going to the root of the problem. And I gots doctors in the family.

Just my 2¢

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 15, 2011, 8:45 pm

I’m generally in sympathy with that view, Uncle Monkey (though I didn’t know the cancer thesis). But when you consider I’ve had various fungal incidents all my life, while I’ve lived in three very different places eating very different food (and kinds of food — my tastes have changed), it’s hard to see what’s been consistent in my diet all that time.

Comment from Noelegy
Time: April 15, 2011, 8:46 pm

About 13 years ago, I found out the hard way that I was allergic to myrrh. I had a rather large laceration on my arm (dropped something ceramic and the shrapnel got me but good) and my new-agey but very competent massage therapist prescribed myrrh oil once the stitches came out, to promote healing.

My arm swelled up like a balloon.

But now you should see the looks I get at the doctor’s when they ask if I have any known allergies and I list as my topical allergies: Band-Aid brand bandage adhesive, and myrrh.

Comment from Mark Matis
Time: April 15, 2011, 11:11 pm

Hey SWeas – I would bet that you have had water to drink in ALL of the places you have lived. You might want to try giving that up and drinking something else instead. Maybe cider? Or Guiness? Or Retsina? Or Oozo? At least you’ll have a good time trying to find if any of that will help…

Comment from lauraw
Time: April 16, 2011, 3:18 pm

Undiluted tea tree oil burns my skin where it’s healthy, never mind putting it on a boo-boo!

If you’re susceptible to fungi, maybe try using Domeboro as a soak once in a while as a preventive.

Comment from Rich Rostrom
Time: April 16, 2011, 4:44 pm

Uncle Monkey: I looked into that. There have been a number of discoveries in recent years about unexpected causes of various ailments. For instance, the bacteria that causes stomach ulcers. I could envision possible causative links between fungal damage and cancer triggers.

But this one looks extremely bogus, That’s if you’re talking about Simoncini, the crank who says he can treat cancer with sodium bicarbonate. David Icke touts him, so I guess he’s not a disguised lizardoid.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: April 17, 2011, 6:16 pm

While mis-adventuring abroad in my youth, I picked up what I like to call “athelete’s foot of the gods.” The only thing that keeps it in check (without making me permanently ill) is Betadine ointment.

They’ve pulled it from the market because it can be used to cook meth.

Damn tweaters.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: April 17, 2011, 6:23 pm

Or “tweakers”

Comment from teresa
Time: April 18, 2011, 8:55 pm

So sorry about your ringworm sweasel. –Bob, seriously? betadine ointment is related to meth? How wild, horse supply outfits still sell povidone iodine ointment, I just checked on valleyvet.com. I live in colorado –no fungi issues so the horse/livestockstuff I personally use is bag balm for minor scrapes or seriously dry chapped hands and soreNomore for an arnica liniment.

Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: April 18, 2011, 9:59 pm

That’s what my pharmacist tells me. I can order it online from the UK, but I’ll get a visit from the OSP.

Damn tweakers. You know how at the end of “Shaun of the Dead” they have zombies competing in all sorts of demeaning gameshows? We should do that with tweakers.

Comment from The Dread Pirate $ADJECTIVE Beard
Time: April 19, 2011, 7:57 pm

Late, but my solution is to rub the spot raw (debriding I think “They” call it), and then anoint it with zippo lighter fluid. Hurts like a bitch, but it does kill the fungus eventually.

Comment from Hector Owen
Time: April 24, 2011, 4:32 am

I had something similar (tinea versicolor) a number of years ago. Tried lots of different things for it. What finally worked was a cream called Lotrimin, active ingredient of which is clotrimazole. FWIW.

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