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Welp, it’s Steam Sale time again, that Amok Time when Valve cuts prices so low you buy a ton of shit you don’t need and somehow believe you’ve saved a bunch of money. Ninety percent off Goat Simulator? Sign me up!

So I was browsing titles and came across Castlevania — you play an old and weary Dracula, yearning to retire. But first you have to fight your boss, Satan, to get out of your contract. It is rated 17+ for Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Language, Nudity.

The punters loved it. The critics, not so much. In fact, it got a mysteriously low Metascore of 58 (user votes are excluded from Metascore). A halfway decent game is always going to be 80+. Then I noticed the disclaimer above.

For those who haven’t been following this particularly complicated internet shit-storm, the simple version is: pro-#GamerGate = people who love videogames just the way they are. Anti-#GamerGate = people who think today’s video games promote violence and sexism and would like to see that change. Much of the professional gaming press — like our lefty betters in journalism everywhere — are firmly in Column B.

See the little #GamerGate recommends icon? Yeah. Steam is promoting games off of the back of the #GamerGate controversy. Gabe Newell is a sooper genius.

Hells yes I bought Castlevania.

And, um, Goat Simulator, too.

Good weekend, folks. Assuming you’ve shaken off the tryptophan coma yet.


Comment from Mojo
Time: November 28, 2014, 11:04 pm

Tried combat goat sim? Same as regular, you go around wrecking shit, but you can strap on missiles, Gatling guns, etc.

I mean, c’mon. Who wouldn’t love it?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 28, 2014, 11:33 pm

I’m playing the MMO version at the moment, Mojo. Butting hippies and elves and shit.

Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 29, 2014, 12:23 am

Oh! Goat Simulator is a GAME!

Well, duh.

I was… Well, my mind naturally… I mean … er …


Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: November 29, 2014, 1:00 am

McGoo was hoping for Goat Stimulator, perhaps?

Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 29, 2014, 12:35 pm

Actually, SD, my relief was palpable when I figured out it wasn’t.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: November 29, 2014, 3:02 pm

It’s quite popular in Pookiestan, or so I hear.

Comment from buffalone
Time: November 29, 2014, 3:05 pm

Thought you might enjoy these Stoatster:


Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 29, 2014, 4:58 pm

Hee hee. Very funny, buffalone.

Comment from ExpressoBold
Time: November 29, 2014, 5:50 pm

Comment from buffalone
Time: November 29, 2014, 3:05 pm

Thought you might enjoy these Stoatster:


Vincent van Gogh…
Regardez! C’est un coq!

Comment from Some alcohol-steeped Vegetable
Time: November 29, 2014, 6:04 pm

Gamergate fascinates me. One could argue that, in some ways, ”’Twas ever thus'”. [See James Thurber’s “. http://johnesimpson.com/images/warbetweenmenandwomen.jpg The War Between Men And Women”.

Certainly we can point to previous examples in The Hague Convention’s Disarmament Talks of 19(05?), and Prohibition where the Social Justice Warriors of their day ran rampant. The current parallels would seem to be Climate Change and ‘Social Justice For Women And The Similarly Oppressed’.

In the past cases, men (aka conservatives) let the women (liberals) chatter on, and gave them their way until, as always, things went too far. In the case of disarmament, only the ‘Good Guys’ – Britian and the U.S. paid much attention as much for financial reasons as moral ones. The Germans gave it lip service until it meant something in August 1914. The parallel now would be Climate Change using China in Place of Germany. For Prohibition, I would say that Social Justice is the equivalent – a genuine problem where everyone can agree that ‘something should be done’ about but the something actually done reached insane levels (total prohibitition) that resulted in problems worse than the original problem. During Prohibition, bootlegging became common enough that everyone kept drinking but now with more expensive, bad quality booze, and organized crime introduced drugs using their established distribution chain when legalization dried up the original market. With the current Social Justice movement, the American Black Community has been set back 50 years and may never recover. Women’s Liberation has gone insane demanding equality while insisting on maintaining victim status. One can’t have it both ways, where we pretend we are playing Big League Ball, but using special rules for girls.

Gamergate may not mark the high water point of feminism but as Winston Churchill once said, it may mark “…the beginning of the beginning of the end.” The demands have become so arbitrary and capricious that at a minimum a whole generation of young men who had paid zero attention to the issue are now soured on it, perhaps beyond the point of return. The pushback has started and soon it won’t just be a resistance, it’ll be a war.

As for Blacks, the same thing is happening. I (believe that I) see that the current generation are not racist in any meaningful way, but see themselves wrongfully attacked as oppressors any way. They know Black American culture well enough to know that it’s bullshit – something my generation didn’t have enough cultural experience to say. I don’t think that welfare dependency can ever be fixed now, but the attention that Blacks get for their grievances will fade as Hispanics displace them as the tipping point vote for the Democrats. They will once again be discarded to the fringes, supported just enough to keep the riots down to a minimum. One might even argue this has already happened as I can’t think offhand of a single program introduced to help them in the past six years.

Sigh… Sorry for the deep rambling thoughts… Sometimes the hair of the dog kills the hangover but leaves the sourness

Comment from Christopher Taylor
Time: November 29, 2014, 6:28 pm

The whole “gamergate” (and STOP USING -GATE, use -QUIDDICK instead!!!) thing is basically the left trying to muscle in and control Anonymous and the internet gaming community. Its an island of often rude and awful, but wild and free liberty in an ocean of political correctness, and that cannot be allowed.

Comment from BJM
Time: November 29, 2014, 10:01 pm

>Hells yes I bought Castlevania.

Me too, just because.

Who the hell cares about gamergate? A coven of whiny women and pussified media types? The PC/SJW mob has to muck about in every facet of our lives. Enough!

Just leave gamers the hell alone, m’kay?

Comment from S. Weasel
Time: November 29, 2014, 10:17 pm

Yes, videogames are extraordinarily libertarian places. They can be terribly unPC.

I’m playing my way through Far Cry 3 at the moment (and enjoying it very much). There are lots of mini-games inside the main game. One type is the timed marksmanship contest. For targets, you shoot gulls and crows out of the sky. BOOM. Red mist and a cloud of feathers.

That’s the sort of thing boys used to do when I was a kid, but it was startling to see in 2014. Also, I kick all sorts of ass at that one (the car racing ones, not so much).

I’m amazed the left hasn’t gone after games harder. No kid who grew up playing games will ever hate guns.

Comment from Steamboat McGoo
Time: November 29, 2014, 11:49 pm

Chris Taylor – your most-excellent suggestion (-quiddick, instead of -gate) Is duly noted! I will use -quiddick it from now, on and suggest it to others whenever I can.

It’s a pity that both suffixes are effectively meaningless to almost anyone younger than about 40.

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: November 30, 2014, 3:06 am

I’m amazed the left hasn’t gone after games harder…

“Come on, Dick…it’s the only education we got!”

The lefties have been trying to control video games since at least the 80’s…do-gooder, pinko-fascist twats. If we were in Prohibition times, I’d definitely be smuggling booze down to the States :+) …hell, I’d build a pipeline…Keystone V.O. Pipeline, heh.

Comment from BJM
Time: November 30, 2014, 4:04 am

>I’m playing my way through Far Cry 3 at the moment

Doncha enjoy stealth mode? The game is totes good fun…however I was a little disturbed by too much guyliner.

@QuasiModo–The left seems determined to create a joyless society.

Comment from Uncle Badger
Time: November 30, 2014, 11:06 am

The Left is, at least in part, a product of the neurotic neo-puritanism that reoccurs every few decades to blight Western society. ‘If we enjoy ourselves, something terrible will happen to punish us!’

Comment from QuasiModo
Time: November 30, 2014, 1:11 pm

@BJM: Yep, pretty soon they’re going to try making us all wear those dreary grey uniforms like the communist Chinese.

@Uncle B: Yep, that’s why they used to throw pretty virgins into volcanoes or burn people in those wicker baskets…so they could indulge themselves the rest of the time without worry…somebody else always winds up paying for their sins.

Comment from SCOTTtheBADGER
Time: December 1, 2014, 6:17 am

You can shoot all the crows you want, but leave the gulls alone. If it wasn’t for the gulls, the local McDonalds and Burger King would be knee deep in French fries dropped by little kids.

Comment from Stark Dickflüssig
Time: December 1, 2014, 9:36 pm

Gulls saved th’ Mormons back in the day. That’s all I know.

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