Gorilla in the mist
We have a badger! This is actually a very bad thing. He’s digging great holes in the lawn looking for worms (their favorite protein source). And there’s jack shit we can do about it. They’re a protected species, and even if they weren’t, what would you do?
We caught him on wildlife camera (he’s been digging up the lawn for days), but the picture quality was so poor owing to ground mist, you can barely make him out. The above was an artist’s reconstruction. By which I mean Grok, of course.
Note the stripes.
Posted: April 6th, 2026 under personal.
Comments: 11
Comments
Comment from QuasiModo
Time: April 6, 2026, 7:41 pm
I had to look at it for a while to tell what it was 🙂
Comment from Anonymous
Time: April 6, 2026, 10:14 pm
🎵
If I were a Badger, I’d badger you in the morning
I’d badger you in the evening, all over the house!
I’d dig holes in the garden!
I’d snuffle round the pantry!
Singing about worms to eat with my brothers and my sisters
All over England! 🎵
Comment from Some Vegetable
Time: April 6, 2026, 10:16 pm
Damn!
How did Akismet know that was ME?
Cause, ah, cause it wasn’t!
Comment from Pupster
Time: April 6, 2026, 11:05 pm
April 6th 7:03 PM EST
Oh man! I get it, destructive and dangerous but BADGERS ARE COOL AF! Stripey-assed snarly grubbers.
Comment from Uncle AL
Time: April 6, 2026, 11:33 pm
Are there any convenient local sources of industrial quantities of worms? Or does “protected species” mean you are committing a crime by feeding one?
I wonder what the going rate is for a kilo of worms.
Comment from Durnedyankee
Time: April 7, 2026, 1:12 am
Badger lawn service.
Removing those pesky earth worms!
Stripes?
Badgers have ranks?
Comment from ExpressoBold Pureblood
Time: April 7, 2026, 2:03 am
Call in a midwest farm boy OR just study his technique for grabbing a badger…
Comment from technochitlin
Time: April 7, 2026, 12:34 pm
Brings back fond memories of “The Wind in the Willows”.
Comment from durnedyankee
Time: April 7, 2026, 2:15 pm
Catfish Tickling
Badger Grabbing
Clogg Dancing
Sheesh.
Comment from S. Weasel
Time: April 7, 2026, 8:35 pm
In case it’s non-obvious, the stripes are an AI hallucination.
Comment from Bob Mulroy
Time: April 8, 2026, 3:39 am
Moth flakes and/or ghost pepper powder if you did want to send him elsewhere.
Do they monitor for TB?
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